Over 4,000 Recaps!

Mister Greco

Battle rap enthusiast living in Timbuktu

Swave Sevah defeats Batas

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Recap: Harlem, NY battle vet Swave Sevah travels overseas to hip-hop hotbed Manila to take on local Filipino battler Batas and despite receiving star treatment in a stadium of onlookers, nearly blows it with a slip-up and near choke in round 1. Thankfully for Swave, his opening round hiccup would be slight and with a fine mixture of fiery personals, righteous bully semantics and witty but also rigid punchlines, the Team Homi leader would be able to easily take the opening rounds before a punch-heavier Batas stepped up his game and handily took the final round.

Verdict: Swave Sevah (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Swave Sevah –  “I was the toughest kid in the sandbox, by 16 I ran blocks, and I dare you to test my Will when that Smif [Smith] is in my hand cocked [Hancock]!”

Ty Law defeats Boogie Flat

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Recap: Ty Law’s wide range of rich personals, potent (“Catch him in his whip, let a Tek aim, head banging on a steer wheel, hit his left brain, had the horn beeping when the feds came, van horn [Van Horn] still was going off like a old ass Nets game!”) schemes and sizzling (“Challengers I’m homy-ing and I’m bodying this slouch, this snitch Jacob the Jeweler, he diamond [dime-ing [diamond] niggas out”) punchlines prove to be too much for even a spelling champ like Boogie Flat, who displayed some (“See, the glock be the toy that’ll leave your spot fractured, I gotcha block mastered, bitch you better back up, watch my bitch act up, son I ain’t no rapper, cock the .4 and let you meet the real 5th factor”) highlights here and there, but until the 3rd round, failed to match Law’s consistency, versatility and overall verbal onslaught.

Verdict: Ty Law (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Ty Law – “I’ll pop your toddler, in ya crib, spark her mad [pow! pow!], two to [tutor] ya kid like I’m smart in math!”

Ah Di Boom defeats 40oz. Jess

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Synopsis: Who knew 40oz. Jess had bars on deck? Still a loss nonetheless as Ah Di Boom’s personals, schemes, performance and aggressive wordplay clearly outnumbered Jess’ hilarious (“See, your flow’s aight but mine’s sicker, only time you need to {w]rap is when you taking it off the stickers”) jokes, but considering 40oz. having little to no experience at this battle rap thing, this wasn’t as bad a look as one might’ve expected.

Verdict: Ah Di Boom (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Ah Di Boom – “Put all that noise in the air, that’s a soundcloud”

Ty Law defeats Clemenza

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Synopsis: Despite a midway slip-up, Ty Law gets his grind up and takes out a competitive, but clearly outclassed Clemenza in this last-minute promo battle.

Verdict: Ty Law (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Ty Law – “This dopehead sniff and drive, nosebleeding and all, like a bitch that caught you cheating, hoe’s keying his car”

Goodz defeats X-Factor

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Synopsis: No battle rapper gets booed outside his home turf more than Aye Verb. Yet, I can’t see Aye Verb ever letting booing stop him from delivering a round like X-Factor does here. Shame too, because this isn’t even Goodz at his best and after the 1st round it was kind of close. And while X-Factor’s 2nd was just wack, a real vet wouldn’t let the crowd get to him like that. Clearly unprepared combined with a “priority’s” angle that went nowhere fast, X-Factor should lose a lot of fans for pulling this crap.

Verdict: Goodz (W) 3-0

Best line: Goodz – “And I heard your tenderoni was a sleaze, she a golddiger, I could mac your roni with some cheese, bake her, until she oven hot then I leave her, you open, so you take her out then you eat her, that’s crazy”

Fonz defeats Yung Daz

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Recap: Showing off his funny bone with a bunch of piercing storytelling bars and witty personals when he wasn’t being his usual punch-worthy self, Fonz easily wins all 3 rounds in what was essentially was a lay-up over a mostly subpar Yung Daz in this matchup from TwoSixteens.

Verdict: Fonz (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Fonz – “So what if ya bitch a little thicker I’ll still dick her to her waist so, you don’t never hit her, you just lick her like a state stub!”

T Top defeats Juice

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Recap: I don’t what’s worse, watching this one-sided battle or Chinese water torture. Yeah, it’s that bad as Juice’s consistently lame (from that horrible ‘milk this cow’ spiel to that terrible ‘I’ll come to your head quarters like George Washington to bring you pain’ line) bars, underwhelming delivery and annoying hypeman seemed to even make the steadily on point (“Your battles getting views my nigga, I’ll give you that, but now your career getting cut shorter than Midget Mac”) T Top have a hard time getting through this battle. Granted, Juice scored just enough points to prevent a bodybag, but the simple fact that he didn’t even know what position Terrell Owens plays (he was only a Pro Bowl wide receiver and NOT a tight end) should be reason enough to never have to watch him battle rap again.

Verdict: T Top (W) 3-0

Favorite line: T Top – “Listen bitch, all that staring could get your vision split, 20/20, that’s a big .40, now spit and whip”

DNA defeats The Saurus

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Recap: When he wasn’t talking throughout DNA’s rounds, The Saurus mostly kicks some lame (“What do you call the people who ghostwrite his bars? DNAides”) rhymes as well as Charlie Clips/DNA fodder that we’ve long been privy too. Thus, it’s a pretty easy 3-0 for DNA, who before spazzing on race matters along with his opponent’s noted hypocrisy for style points in round 3, took round 1 and edged round 2 with better delivery, (“I came with all my niggas, we rolling 60 deep, don’t ask me if I ball, just know that I grip the heat, ain’t got nothing but white shooters, so you could die from a Pistol Pete”) wordplay and punchlines.

Verdict: DNA (W) 3-0

Favorite line: DNA – . “Now you wanna act like it’s words nigga, your brains will be on that curve nigga, shoot you and your bitch with a .33 on her, now you on the back of that Bird nigga!”

O-Red defeats Yung Ill

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Synopsis: Since he hasn’t spoken about it publicly, one can only guess what’s going on in Yung Ill’s personal life these days and one can only hope that its gotten a lot better since this battle dropped. Still, the belief here is that once you step on the stage and into the ring…all bets are off. That said this is just hard to watch as Ill pulls consecutive choke after choke that makes you not only cringe, but wish he had listened to the audience and just stopped mid verse (or freestyle) in each round. Of course, with the repeated hot bars O-Red spits throughout here, I’m guessing that even if Ill had brought his A-game, he probably wouldn’t have been able to stand up to Red anyway. But if you paid your hard-earned dollars to see these two at their best, it’s a shame only one of the them was able to give you your money’s worth.

Verdict: O-Red 3-0

Best line: O-Red – “But now you standing here like you poppin’ thangs, stop it lame, you nervous, I can hear you shaking nigga, you pocket change…”

Moon defeats Gooch

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Recap: Excuse the loud and aggressive, but mostly basic raps from Gooch as this one is all Moon. Whether delivering stifling personals (esp. in the 3rd) or dishing on raw, authentic street shit or spitting fire schemes or spouting spine-tingling gun lines, an all-business-mode and consistent Moon puts it all together for 3 rounds to take this one going away.

Verdict: Moon (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Moon – “I ain’t gotta kill you, I could cock back the pistol, hand it to you and let you do that yourself!”

Dizaster defeats Loonie

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Recap:  Filipino battle rapper Loonie, arguably the most viewed rapper in the world, holds his own with some witty barbs/personals and stinging punches here and there against Dizaster in this Sunugan 3-rounder. But one too many dry spots from Loonie plus his inability to sustain enough consistent bite to beat back Diz’s mocking personals, boastful darts, raucous multi’s and aggressive name-calling/name flips, costs the Filipino battler a hometown win.

Verdict: Dizaster (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Dizaster – “You’re not even a Filipino emcee, you look like a Vietnamese Beastie Boy!”

O’fficial defeats Unique Barrz

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Recap: Plenty of dope punchlines in this close matchup between O’fficial and Unique Barrz (“I’m like lazy detectives the way I let a case go”), but Unique might as well as have been reading from a book the way so many of her bars lacked passion and delivery. Edge it to O’fficial for a better performance overall and a little more variety with her bars.

Verdict: O’fficial (W) 2-1

Favorite line: O’fficial – “Your names Unique, that’s what bitches call themselves when they know they ugly”

Presidential Dubz defeats Eclipse Da God

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Recap: In what started out as a bit of a snorefest what with Presidential Dubz and Eclipse Da God feeling each other out through a haze of mediocre bars, earns with mark when Dubz takes flight about midway through his second round, dizzying his opponent with spitfire punchlines along with righteous personals, fiery performance bars and heated gun liners that left the haymaker-challenged Eclipse probably seeking another lane to display his rap talent.

Verdict: Presidential Dubz (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Presidential Dubz – “Fuck you doing singing to the next nigga, that shit’s homo, R&B ass nigga, I’ll let that K see Jojo!”

Tay Roc defeats Rolla

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Synopsis: Real good battle. I had no idea who Rolla was before seeing him here, but judging from this battle vs. Tay Roc we need to see more of him–he’d make a good impression on URL’s Proving Grounds stage ’cause he’s funny with performance and has bars (love the shots he took at Roc’s hypeman here). However, Roc was typical Roc tho with aggression, vet status, delivery, nice schemes and just better consistent bars (esp. in rounds 1 and 3) to give him the win.

Verdict: Tay Roc (W) 2-1

Best line: Tay Roc – “You dead, your family gonna need a wigi board to talk to you”

Conceited defeats The Kid

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Recap: The straightforward style of Aussie rapper The Kid works best here when he cobines wit with performance as he does in the 3rd round. Other than that Kid’s basic wordplay, as showcased in the early rounds, is no contest for Conceited’s versatile (“In this battle while I’m beating The Kid, this is child abuse!”) name flips and fiery punchlines.

Verdict: Conceited (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Conceited – “See, thee lesson I’m trying to teach is when that heat squirting and that infra-red beam working, he’ll be another Aussie to die from a ray like Steve Irwin!”

DNA defeats Anecdote

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Recap: From Australia’s Got Beef league, against a solid overall punch game from Anecdote, DNA uses a steady diet of fierce name flips, rigid schemes and a couple of spicy rebutalls to edge rounds 2 and 3 (call round 1 debatable) of this 3-rounder for the win.

Verdict: DNA (W) 2-1

Favorite line: DNA – “Your metaphors and schemes are stretched out like a rubberband, and your punches are like Alice ‘cuz you can’t get one to land [Wonnderland]!”

Rich Dolarz and McKims [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: If Rich Dolarz is going to waste some bars and throw some shots at his peers in a battle, he might as well do it in a one-rounder here against a relative unknown in McKims. Still, for all of Rich’s (“It’ll make you commit suicide, not because you ain’t feeling well, my honey cocaine [Honeycomb] make a nigga wanna kill themselves!”) swagger-jacking, too many lines here just didn’t quite add up to the deft of his sheer intensity. Thankfully, for McKims that’s just enough room for his witty, but filler-prone banter to score a draw.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: McKims – “I forever hold the peace [piece] like I didn’t have anything to say at the wedding!”

Luciano Crakk defeats Kinaze

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Recap: Very close battle between Luciano Crakk and Kinaze. Better jokes (that “Quack bitch” line/rebuttal killed) on Kinaze’s side, but tighter bars, metaphors and execution on Crakk’s. Those who think Kinaze clearly won might be caught up in the hype provided his cheerleaders.

Verdict: Luciano Crakk (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Luciano Crakk – “I’m like a real estate agent, as soon as she saw homes I had to give her that property”

Bigg K defeats 9DM

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Recap: “Every bar that I made is as sharp as a blade”, “turn white into green like incredible hulk”
…basic lines like that might’ve worked in the 90’s, but a couple of decades later you need heavy wordplay, metaphors, similes, etc. in order to hang with the big boys and as shown here 9DM isn’t equipped with any of those. That said, easy win for Bigg K…and yes that’s ‘Bigg’ with two g’s…how dare he.

Verdict: Bigg K (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Bigg K – “I’m from Shark city where the goons ride and the bricks cook, where you from y’all make moonshine and hunt Big Foot”

Scripts defeats Young Kannon

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Synopsis: I remember Scripps from his battle with B-Magic, so I knew he’d bring his A-game here. And against an earnest YK, you knew this would be a good battle. I had it tied after round one, but Scripps was more consistent and delivered better bars and personals in round 3 to earn the W.

Verdict: Scripts (W) 2-1

Best line: (tie) YK – “Kidnap ya shortie and hold her longer than Smack footage” and Scripts – “The way she sucking on the dick, Kan I got your bitch rubber-necking, fuck her from the back, look like I’m discount double-checking”

K-Shine defeats DNA

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Recap: First of all, salute to Lil Caeser and Wyclef, who co-hosted this battle and of course, R.I.P. Biggie Smalls. That said, besides an educational, spitfire and classic appearance in round 3 from ‘Professor Shine’, a couple of things always stood out about this battle between K-Shine and DNA. For starters, there’s the dope schemes/name flips and personals shown by each battler throughout the bout. Secondly, you have all the Charlie Clips mentions. And then there’s the fact that for all the ridicule DNA’s gotten for that WTF moment in choosing to rap-on-beat towards the end of his turn, up until that disastrous decision, his final round was not only crazy, but competitive and looking to be his best round of the night..Either way, a pretty memorable battle that would spearhead one of the greatest battle-rap duo’s of all-time, would be decided by a speed-rapping, but gritty and punch-heavy Shine taking the 1st round before an equally-stout, but also condensed DNA edged the 2nd. And ably assisted by an electrifying cameo from the rarely seen and previously mentioned Prof. Shine, a versatile and consistently hitting Shine would take the 3rd for the win.

Verdict: K-Shine (W) 2-1

Favorite line: K-Shine – “I’m in shape like Rocky when was boxing Apollo, ‘If he dies, he dies!’, I got the conscious of Drago!”

 

Ave defeats P.G. Skillet

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Recap: Loud with the heat and aggressive with the parlay, it’s too bad that overall PG Skillet’s bars lacked so much intricacy, leaving a solid, but very beatable (esp. after the 1st round) Ave with a pretty banal sweep of this battle from 7 Cities Sharks.

Verdict: Ave (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Ave – “Nigga’s never picked you for blazin;, you like Jordan with Portland!”

prez mafia defeats Double R Mafia

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Recap: This “Battle of the Mafia’s” sees a horrible coin toss, prez stumble and Double R literally almost run out of gas with his bars, but lyrically it’s still the kid from the Bronx who comes one better.

Verdict: prez mafia (W) 1-0

Favorite line: prez mafia -“I’ll punch you in the middle of April, that’s a boxspring”

Sno defeats Gambitt

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Recap: Easy win for Sno who literally goes ham with an assortment of gun bars, sexual innuendo lines and crisp punchlines to outcook Gambitt.

Verdict: Sno (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Sno – “I’m sonning your monkey ass, like the man in the yellow hat!”

O-Red defeats T-Rex

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Synopsis: Good to see Rex came to win as too many of the veteran battle rappers still don’t seem to take O-Red seriously (despite the great run’s he on). And yet while I had it tied going into the 3rd round, Red easily took round 3 with enough over-the-top personals and stellar bars to make Rex leave with his first loss in Jersey.

Verdict: O-Red (W) 2-1

Best line: O-Red – “You just talk tough, I ain’t gotta show you my cocky side, my machine could do all the talking, Johnny 5”

Bonnie Godiva defeats Shiest Raw

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Recap: Damn, they just walked into that “Who in here think Shiest raw?’ line by Bonnie Godiva, who also used a bunch of other hitting set-ups/punchlines, witty/aggressive personals and boastful barbs to easily beat the gritty, but mostly pedestrian stylings of Ms. Raw in this 1-rounder from WBL Philly.

Verdict: Bonnie Godiva (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Bonnie Godiva – “I hate you, you Black bitch…I’m Uncle Rufus nigga!”

Danny Myers and Emerson Kennedy [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: Even if it’s just for only one round, two battle emcees going at it on 24-hours notice is always impressive. That said, with Danny Myers taking awhile before he really got in his bag and Emerson Kennedy dishing consistently nice (“All of your nigga’s hitters, but ya didn’t often know, is they running trains behind ya back like Mister Rogers show!”) schemes/bars that was only spoiled by a slip-up towards the end, let’s call this one even.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: Danny Myers – “Beat you the fair way, he the type to tie his album to a kite just to get some airplay!”

Math Hoffa defeats Shotty Horror

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Recap: A somewhat bizarre match between Math and Shotty Horror as Math shockingly takes a round off (which I don’t have a problem with considering that other athletes do it, like boxers and tennis players) and Shotty besides some nice Tupac schemes, surprisingly underwhelms before totally slipping up in round 3 and having to resort to freestyling in order to save him from a choke. That said, overall an easy win for Math, who despite at times struggling with his delivery, easily took rounds 1 and 3 with better penmanship, consistency and personals to gain a win in Manchester over one of Europe’s best.

Verdict: Math Hoffa (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Math Hoffa – “Now if you ain’t in Manchester, you probably can’t win fights, this slave went to the North so he could land [swings punch] his rights!”

40 B.A.R.R.S. defeats Phara Funeral

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Recap: QOTR 3-round main event between Phara Funeral and 40 B.A.R.R.S. had its moments of addressing rumors, spicy personals, fierce schemes and punch-heavy linguistics here and there, but for the most part settled into a solid bar-fest with a kill switch that surprisingly was never turned on when considering the seeming dislike these two had for each other. And while a sometimes prone to missteps Phara performed straight through without any unforced errors, a couple of elongated rounds and one too many aimless spins would help an aggressive, gritty and more steady with the heat 40 handily take both of the opening rounds for the win before a 3rd round debatable.

Verdict: 40 B.A.R.R.S. (W) 2-1

Favorite line: 40 B.A.R.R.S. – “How you a pioneer?, it only took me a year for me to get to P, that’s ‘cuz I’m raw, Salmonella, common codeine ain’t as sick as me!”

QB (Black Diamond) defeats Don Ladyii

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Recap: This was unfair. For all the talking these two did before this battle, the results are a one-sided affair that had you wishing someone had thrown in the towel for Don Ladyii after round 2. Funny too to see that Don Ladyii’s attempt to put QB’s alleged criminal past on blast didn’t go over well with the crowd…at all. Only Couture could pull that shit off. Again this was unfair….QB all day.

Verdict: QB (W) 3-0

Favorite line: QB – “So when that Mac-11 click shit, I been a feen, squeeze on a boss like Rick Ross in skinny jeans”

Jay Rell defeats HBK

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Recap: After a somewhat lackluster round by HBK, Jay Rell goes hard in the paint, delivers fiery bars with hitting jokes and shows why he belongs in the big leagues.

Verdict: Jay Rell (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Jay Rell – “This battle started bad, when I show him how this Tommy work, that’ll make Martin mad”

Math Hoffa defeats Shotgun Suge

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Synopsis: “Bully” vs, “Bully”, just what the fans had wanted. But based on experience and lyrics alone did anybody really think Shotgun had a chance? Despite a couple of early stumbles Math’s consistent personals, aggression, jokes and of course, bars like that just did a number on an over-matched from jump Suge–who while not aware that Tupac was actually born in New York, came with typical aggression, delivery, shit-talking (“You think life’s a fucking joke nigga, you gon fuck around with them fuck arounds and fuck around and get smoked nigga”) and even some hot bars (“you gonna catch a nugget in New York like number 7 from the Knicks”). Still, Math’s fat jokes (“he talk about he the shooter and the driver, cuz can’t nobody else fit in the whip'”) and that real talk during Round 1 about how Suge almost got Arsonal and Surf killed in Detroit, was more than enough for Brooklyn to take home the trophy.

Verdict: Math Hoffa (W) 3-0

Best line: Math Hoffa – “When Trick Trick stepped to Arsonal it was over you, if I was Surf I’d punch you in the face for what I’m gonna do, I guess this shit was overdue, a lesson learned for both of you, a shotgun does the most damage when it’s close to you”

Ty Law defeats Ajax

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Recap: Ajax kept it close here against Ty Law through two rounds thanks to a nice flow that spouted some dope (“I’m from Shark City where them heaters stay squeezing, you from PG County…where there’s PTA meetings”; “I’mma take this early, see the flow stupid cold [Cole], but I don’t date Big Shirley!”) bars and some fierce wordplay. But a lack of consistency with some filler here and there, a couple of slip-ups in the 3rd round and Law’s more steady punchlines game along with aggressive bully (“I’ll kick his features till his teeth is chipped, no cereal, I got him eating Kix [kicks]”) bars, ended up setting Ajax adrift.

Verdict: Ty Law (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Ty Law – “This guy will get his kin killed when I pull a glock, bullets hot, thought he coudl touch me but now he looking shot, back down B, all you get is a wooden box!”

Danny Myers defeats Rachit

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Recap: Good call by the host to end this one a little early as Danny Myers was just OD’ing on opponent Rachit here in this 1-rounder with $500 on the line. Indeed, while Rachit came with some gritty street missives, one too many subpar punches from him along with Myers rampant performance-rich bars, grandiose displays of mayhem, flexing punchlines/wordplay/schemes and jaunty personals were just too much in the end.

Verdict: Danny Myers (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Danny Myers – “You are battling the G.O.A.T. so that makes you the sacrificial lamb!”

Bonnie Godiva defeats Lexx Banko

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Recap: From QOTR, a dope, competitive battle between Bonnie Godiva and a fiery Lexx Banko with Bonnie’s wit making the difference after the two split the opening rounds. A consistently raucous, but also funny at times Banks stayed on her opponent’s neck with plenty of rich mayhem, real street shit and head-ringing punchlines, while a more versatile Bonnie kept it aggressive and earnest with loaded schemes, piercing braggadocios lines, some fire name flips/wordplay and stifling personals/jokes. After the punch-heavier Godiva took the first and a gritty Lexx edged the 2nd, a pretty solid 3rd round from both battlers goes to the slightly punch-heavier Bonnie for the win.

Verdict: Bonnie Godiva (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Bonnie Godgiva – “I know you chubby chasers like to eat the cake more than the twat!”

Viixen The Assassin defeats Ash Cash

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Recap: Well, at least Ash Cash’s hair looked really nice. Sporting some fire wordplay, a bunch of biting personals, piercing punchlines/boastful barbs and of course, helped too by the notoriously forgetful Ash Cash’s usual assortment of slip-ups and chokes, Viixen The Assassin gets an easy 30 in this 3-rounder from Barz N Brastrapz.

Verdict: Viixen The Assassin (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Viixen The Assassin – “You want to be a star so bad but you still got bum-bitch tendencies, how you expect to have the whole package when you lacking delivery!?”

J. Murda defeats D. Skrillz

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Recap: Getting downright nasty and spitting line after scheming (“My fighting style is influential, you get dropped, that talk come to a stop before the hook come, that’s an instrumental”) line with straight confidence and flair, J. Murda forgoes the filler and puts a hurting on D. Skrillz–who came with some (“I ain’t brought you in this world little nigga, but I’ll take you the fuck out”) shine and got better as his round prolonged, but overall didn’t produce near enough heat to withstand Murda’s repeated fire.

Verdict: J. Murda (W) 1-0

Favorite line: J. Murda – “Loss, y’all gonna pay the price to your boss for not showing respect, it’s looking bad boy, ambulance ain’t got no special delivery, and about to pay your G. debt [G. Dep]”

Young Kannon and Lil Dave [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: Lil Dave is funny as hell, came creative too with the “let me ask you a questions” lines, has some nice bars, knows how to storytell and can clearly play to the crowd. That said, while YK came hitting with the bars, there wasn’t much variety, he had a couple of slight stumbles and you’ve seen him hit harder as well as come with more consistent heat. So with all being fair, URL rapper vs. non-URL rapper and all, this one is a draw.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: Lil Dave – “And in your battle vesus JC you said some shit that was so untrue, you said you was blowing la with those Milwaukee niggas, Nigga we was smoking with YOU!”

Charlie Clips defeats Arsonal

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Recap: It’s been said plenty of times by both critics and his peers that Arsonal can be filler-prone and no battle exemplifies that belief more than this one versus Charlie Clips. I mean, how bad did Ars’ penchant for saying a whole lot of nothing get? When you’re inviting a female member of your hometown crowd to suck your you-know-what because she’s bored stiff at listening to your pedestrian raps, you just know that it wasn’t a good day at the office. And let it be noted that besides a versatile, punch-heavy, scheme-savvy, witty and off-the-dome efficient Clips doing him in for 3 rounds (to be fair, the 1st round, easily Ars’ shortest and most condensed, was close), Ars’ failure to consistently get disrespectful (his biggest strength) with his bars and his bent on weak personals, predictable punchlines, elongated schemes as well as random shots at DNA and URL didn’t help his cause either in a battle that was ultimately pretty one-sided.

Verdict: Charlie Clips (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Charlie Clips – “I could see mama Arsonal texting his phone, ‘Hey baby come over for supper!’, he walk in with an attitude ‘cuz the first person he spot is his brother, on his way to wash his hands in the bathroom, what did he discover?, a woman kissing on Joe Budden’s neck and it’s ya mother…everybody in your family like Joe Buddens’ Ars!”

Couture defeats Jai Smoove

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Recap: After surviving a lyrically sharp, wordplay-nice, fierce calendar-scheme dishing 1st round from Jai Smoove, an elongated, but no split-hair having Couture still makes the most of her latter rounds with a boatload of fiery gun bars, spicy punchlines, boastful barbs and hard-hitting/witty personals to beat back her gritty, but less substantive opponent and get the win in this 3-rounder from QOTR.

Verdict: Couture (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Couture – “Now you taking this death for free and these views?, don’t get ’em confused, they just for me!”

J.U.S. defeats Stuey Newton

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Recap: NorthWest Alliance Battle League matchup between Stuey Newton and J.U.S. stays close for 3 rounds with a nice mix of nifty punchlines, spicy name flips, solid wordplay and rigid mayhem/personals all there to keep you paying attention. Competitive throughout, it’s still a more steady with the bite J.U.S. who manages to edge the first two rounds for the win before a punch-heavier Stuey avoids the shutout by taking the 3rd.

Verdict: J.U.S. (W) 2-1

Favorite line: J.U.S. – “It only takes one phone call if I’m ever in a tough spot, the only time Stuey pulls strings is when his bus stops!”

Charron defeats HFK

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Recap: For two battlers that allegedly ‘didn’t want to battle each other’ due to their friendship, Charron and HFK still put on a dope show for KOTD, delivering 3 spirited, highly competitive rounds that was littered with frequent boasts/disses, piercing punchlines and a slew of spicy personals and storytelling bars. Still, while the battle stayed close throughout, it’s a slightly more consistent and less pontificating Charron who edges all 3 rounds for the win.

Verdict: Charron (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Charron – “You’re an impatient, ignorant bastard who couldn’t get any fatter, eating your Advent calendar in one day doesn’t make Christmas come any faster!”

Vicci defeats K Holla

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Recap: A sloppy 3rd round by K Holla along with consistently witty punchlines throughout by Vicci allows the little guy to take the win from this featured rooftop PG battle.

Verdict: Vicci (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Vicci – “Well since my Tek’s are shooting it’s like Western Union the way I wire them cans, to give him that 4-0 plus that 1 k, what’s that’s? a retirement plan”

Pat Stay and Shotty Horror [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: In a shortened 1-round battle that begs for a rematch, Shotty Horroh makes up for forgetting his rhymes by free-styling some solid punches and witty (“Who the fuck gave Organik loads of protein?!”) personals that had enough bite to earn a draw against a hitting at times, but also not on his A-game Pat Stay.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: Pat Stay – “Only thing you have in common with Wolf, is your flow backwards!”

Pat Stay defeats Math Hoffa

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Recap: Even with the usual narratives we witness with these two: Math Hoffa “bully”-semantics and Pat Stay’s alleged drug use/topsy-turvy friendship with Hollohan making appearances, these two top tier battlers still put on a dope, competitive showing in this entertaining 3-rounder from KOTD. Pat, with plenty of boastful shiners and witty personals included in his repertoire consistently wrecked havoc, while a wily and aggressively stunting Math impressed throughout the battle with a gang of slick wordplay whether it was directed at his opponent or at KOTD. Still, after a debatable 1st round, it’s Pat who manages to lay down a higher quotient of haymakers in each of the latter rounds for the win.

Verdict: Pat Stay (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Pat Stay – “Everyday you gotta put on that tough mood, God that must bug you, his mom’s be like, ‘Love you!’, he be like, ‘Whatever. Fuck you!'”

Lotta Zay defeats Sir Locksley

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Recap: Sir Locksley had some tough (“Cut him off while he still running his mouth like Kung Fu flicks”) bars and put up a fight towards the end, but it still wasn’t near enough to beat Lotta Zay’s consistent wordplay, performance (“When its beef you a hurricane victim, this punk just hides, wait until everything blows over then he comes outside”) bars, name flips and hitting punchlines.

Verdict: Lotta Zay (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Lotta Zay – “You gonna die it’s not cuisine when I lean treys [trays], you Smart Ones better help him make a Healthy Choice”

Arcane defeats Dizaster

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Recap: Taking advantage of a Dizaster too spent on allegations of stolen bars from his opponent, but also scoring left and right with a shitload of spicy punchlines, fiery schemes/gun bars, righteous mayhem and piercing personals, Arcane registers more than enough haymakers to take the opening rounds before the Diz we all know and love comes back with a boisterous, punch-heavy and near-flawless turn in the 3rd round to avoid getting shutout in a title match that would see Diz would have to give up his KOTD title chain.

Verdict: Arcane (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Arcane – “The way you recycle bars, that’s a cop out…laziness, your shit sound incomplete with The Lox without Jadakiss!”

Tone Montana defeats Cashis

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Recap: “This is the type of shit Tone Montana do”….a lyrically adept (and focused) Tone Montana impresses throughout with bar after bar of replete punchlines, jokes, schemes (esp. that “dreams” joint, round 1) and street shit, taking out Cashis while reminding viewers of what all the hype was about.

Verdict: Tone Montana (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Tone Montana – “You broke as a fat stripper”

Young X defeats Poetically Kushin

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Recap: Poetically Kushin’s mostly one-dimensional real rap (“Sunglasses at night nigga?, what you think you Canibus, son?”) talk and standard gun bars prove to be no match for Young X’s better mix of braggadocio (“Y’all about to hear more oooh’s and ahhh’s bars than an Ave. battle, but I’m really saying somethin’!”) bars, name (“See?, I don’t fuck with Kushin and them, I don’t fuck with Kushin’s crew…so I guess it’s safe to say that I don’t fuck with A Chosen Few!”) flips and aggressive punchlines.

Verdict: Young X (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Young X – “I got a revolver, his gun on safety, that make the score 44 to 2…I said I got revolver, his gun on safety, that make the score .44 to .2!”

Jai defeats Jus Juice

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Recap. Solid battle between Jus Juice and Jai is decided by more versatile turns by Jai. Who in the first couple of rounds, overcame a plethora of real rap stylings by Juice with a steady mix of sturdy name flips, hard-hitting personals, nice (“Won’t stop till I’m on top and they saying I’m great, long story short…this nigga couldn’t end J if he was abbreviating my state!”) wordplay and witty jokes. Still, give Juice credit for hanging in there with a potent (“Rocking them bright colors, I’ll roll up, smoke J…it’s the 80’s nigga!”) 3rd round that allowed him to avoid getting 3-0’d.

Verdict: Jai (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Jai – “…. so when that caliber spit…URL won’t be the only one’s with the footage of Jones battling Clips!”

Automatic Ray defeats O’fficial

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Recap: Slightly more intricate and consistent with his punches/schemes/personals in round 1, before snapping with some fierce and witty 4-bar set-ups in the second round, Automatic Ray beats back a lyrical, but mostly so-so O’fficial early to make what was a pretty pedestrian 3rd round irrelevant when it comes to the outcome.

Verdict: Automatic Ray (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Automatic Ray – “Bitch you keep having 3somes, Mike & Ike, Ben & Jerry!”

Lexcee Baby defeats Lady Caution

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Recap: Flexing throughout with a gang of brazen punchlines, witty personals, some rigid wordplay/schemes and head-ringing /gun bars/hometown heat, for 3 rounds Milwaukee battler Lexcee Baby puts an absolute hurting on a gritty, but lyrically over-matched Lady Caution and scores a 30 in this bout from Barz N Brastrapz.

Verdict: Lexcee Baby (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Lexcee Baby – “Cause a scene and I’ll shoot the movie…that’s a bootleg!”

K.O. defeats Presidential Dubz

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Recap: A nice barfest between Presidential Dubz and K.O. sees both deliver an assortment of potent gun bars along with quintessential wordplay. And while an aggressive and personal-drenched (“You have yet to win a fucking battle…nah, forreal, forreal, you have yet to WIN a fucking battle!”) Dubz came (“Let’s get something straight here, he went from snitching to being a barber,,,oh I get it, he like lining nigga’s up!”) crazy at times (moreso in rounds 2 and 3), K.O.’s more consistent flow, copious reconstruction of bars and steadier (“I leave more heads wrapped than a Dominican salon!”; “You could learn from mistakes, but for thinking with my dick I should’ve never spit you out!”) punches was more than enough to take first two rounds and the win.

Verdict: K.O. (W) 2-1

Favorite line: K.O. – “Bars outta control, I’m dead nuts, the lead bust, this bitch catching an Ocho head butt!”

Brixx Belvedere defeats Cityy Towers

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Recap: Proving once again that you don’t always have to win battles with haymakers, Brixx Belvedere takes Cityy Towers to school (tho that “I’ll make your life look like the Jersey Shore…right now” line was mean) with bars (“hammers might glow if the lights go coward, I’ll show this pupil what a pair is, you’ll get an eyeful [Eiffel] Tower”) galore that included nice metaphors, punchlines (“Fucking been savage [Ben Savage] like Topanga!”), history lessons and even a nifty Slow-it-Down to keep the crowd moving…all with Conceited’s stamp of approval. No doubt. S.O.N.S. all day.

Verdict: Brixx Belvedere (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Cityy Towers – “Nigga you don’t play the block and check for narcs, you text hoes and when they don’t text back you send them question marks”

Nuborn defeats Super Writer

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Synopsis: Very good battle with plenty of dope wordplay and punchlines on both sides. Nuborn was probably on his way to a win till he slipped-up bad near the end of Round 3. Still, since Super Writer (“You washed up like baptisms when we see Born again”) also had a slip-up in his last round, the edge here stays with Nuborn based off that ill “numbers” scheme, which was the best anyone had to offer in their final rounds.

Verdict: Nuborn (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Nuborn – “So I’m supposed to believe you run around and squeeze clips?, nigga when’s the last time you let your 4 point? Oh [4.0], it was the Dean’s List”

P Muny defeats Danny Myers

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Recap: Thought the crowd clearly yelled louder for P Muny on the 1st go-round after the battle. Either way, Muny definitely gets the win here as his nimble, but highly potent, witty at times and consistent punch/wordplay-game in the latter two rounds (call the 1st debatable) edged a mayhem-drenched, but stung by one too many dry spots Danny Myers in this competitive 3-rounder from AHAT.

Verdict: P Muny (W) 2-1

Favorite line: P Muny – “Cali nigga’s bugging, trying to rap so furious, you remind me of 40 Glocc…a Cali nigga that didn’t take The Game serious!”

Ill Will defeats Johnie Alcatraz

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Recap: A strong, (“My hands nice, I keep a cannon tho, big ARs, small k’s, all different size like a ransom note!”) punch/scheme-heavy and sometimes (“Silencer on the toast, you don’t know who did it, it’s like a dog fart!”) stirring performance by Johnie Alcatraz is eclipsed by a mightier, (“Hey because, just let him know, he just keep coming with all that bullshit, fronting out his mouth, talking about some shit that he knows nothing about, I’ll cock back, wave the steel and throw of ya cousin’s in his mouth!”) personal/mock-heavy and wordplay (“We don’t bang nigga, but play sweet, I’ll take a red rag and crack ya head till you blue [blew] blood…now you Grape Street!”) crazy 3 rounds from Pontiac, Michigan’s Ill Will in this Proving Grounds matchup from Smack/URL.

Verdict: Ill Will (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Ill Will – “This little nigga talk militant, [but] he Huey from The Boondock, I’m Huey Newton from the rooftop!”

Mr. Wavy defeats Yung Xerxes

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Synopsis: Damn, this was brutal. Wavy puts on a superb show complete with crazy punchlines, dope schemes, feelgood bars (“It’s Mr. Wavy I’m into bad bitch[es] on sight, and I’m known to be on skin like mosquito bites”) and altogether an over-the-top performance. And the other guy….yeah well this is brutal.

Verdict: Mr. Wavy (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Mr. Wavy – “Pardon my back lil nigga, it’s Mr. Wavy, shit I could walk away without a stain on em, he still talkin’ I moon walk it and bang on em!”

Emerson Kennedy defeats Pat Maine

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Recap: Confidently dishing fiery schemes like your local Hustle Man, while also flipping his opponent Pat Maine’s persistent, but often mediocre use of race angles with a fresh palette of stinging punchlines/personals and amiable wordplay, a consistently bar-heavy Emerson Kennedy easily takes all 3 rounds in this battle from Mic Masters.

Verdict: Emerson Kennedy (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Emerson Kennedy – “My last name Kennedy and you’re getting killed by a Dead President!”