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Caustic

Stuey Newton defeats Caustic

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Recap: In a KOTD Season 1 battle that certainly lagged with the punches at times and saw Stuey Newton announce early on in round 1 that he wouldn’t be using any gun bars for the match (then proceed to use a gang of them), despite some lazy angles from both Stuey and the ever-witty (and at times here pretty lyrical) Caustic, a spicy rebuttal in the opener helps a more condensed Newton edge that round, before he also edges the deciding 3rd for the win thanks to a steadier hitting punch game.

Verdict: Stuey Newton (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Stuey Newton – “On the best white rappers list, even 100 Bullets is ranked higher than you!”

Caustic defeats Mackk Myron

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Recap: Gritty punchlines, aggressive gun bars, righteous mayhem and of course, because it is a Caustic battle, plenty of racial shiners here in this 3-round, KOTD matchup versus Mackk Myron. Add in a handful of fly rebuts and freestyles by both rappers, this close and competitive battle stays tied going into the 3rd round, before the slightly more consistent and personal-flexing Caustic edges a pretty solid turn by Mac to edge the deciding round on points and potency for the win.

Verdict: Caustic (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Caustic – “I gotta ask y’all, what kind of Mac is this?, look like he be in the Popeye’s throwing hands and shit, you like the heavyweight champion of defending chicken sandwiches!”

Bonnie Godiva and Caustic [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: Credit to Bonnie Godiva for holding her own here, mixing it up with one of the most witty and disrespectful battlers in the game, Caustic, and outside of some flat rebuttals, delivering a bunch of fire punches, piercing personals and disrespectful (“If you really Italian bro, I’m a need you to bring ya momma to prove it, ‘cuz with that nose, you gotta be Jewish!”) shiners of her own to wholeheartedly compete and score a draw (got Caustic taking the 1st round, Bonnie took the 2nd and with the help of some dope rebuttals by Caustic, score round 3 a tie) in this 3-rounder from Rotation TV.

Verdict: Debatable

Favorite line: Caustic – “Bitch, no matter what the fuck we do, you don’t seem to go away, bitch, you’re an abortion clinic, your whole career is a bunch of Nuborn throwaways!”

Caustic defeats T-Rex

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Recap: Here in this KOTD 3-rounder vs. T-Rex, after getting edged in the first round to some more pertinent heat from his wily opponent, Caustic’s witty barbs, hitting personals/punchlines and fiery wordplay combine to easily take the latter two rounds and gain the win over a by then pretty redundant Rex.

Verdict: Caustic (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Caustic – “The last few years we haven’t really seen improvement, they should call you Tomb Raider Rex, this bitch’s career is in ruins!”

Bigg K defeats Caustic

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Recap: Bigg K and Caustic make for a spirited, competitive and memorable battle with plenty of mocking personals, lyrical shiners, righteous punchlines, witty barbs and for Caustic, especially during his tension-filled, uber-personal 3rd round, a plethora of real-life drama that let you know he isn’t just about getting a laugh. Even tho his opponent clearly wasn’t impressed, a punch-heavy (“Like you wasn’t a nerd up in prison, I bet you got checked on sight like terms and conditions!”), funny and more consistent Caustic takes a close first round before Bigg K ups his punchline/personal game and easily takes out an elongated and sometimes-indirect turn by Caustic in the 2nd round to even things up. And while the aforementioned turn by Caustic in the deciding 3rd was an at-times emotional and notable one, K’s ability to ‘kick’ his opponent’s real-life struggles aside for a (“But I guess when you’re Mr. Disrespectful, that’s how you do things, walk around Oakland with a cat on a shoestring!”) hilarious, creative and mocking turn on Caustic’s cat, wins him the round and the battle.

Verdict: Bigg K (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Bigg K – “Razor to ya face, get severed in cold cuts, you soft, peanut butter and jelly with no crust!”

Big T defeats Caustic

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Recap: Spirited matchup between Caustic and Big T sees the Cali rapper kill with the fat (“Look at him up here, acting like he a calm dude, you put some hot sauce on his grits, the shit will change his whole mood”; “One time this motherfucker did a somersault…shit took all summer!”) jokes, but fail to show much of anything else–an admitted bar deficiency that literally making him lean on what he does best: humor. In the meantime, Big T slowed down on the gun sounds and went instead with a steady mix of rich personals, potent (“This blade will scar bro [Scarborough] like a hood in Toronto”) wordplay and brash storytelling (“Nigga I’ll pull up to your door like it had a lift on it, and get to shooting at the door like somebody hung a plastic rim on it”) bars, all backed by a steely flow that stayed forthright enough to pull off the win.

Verdict: Big T (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Big T –  “Chest shot, expose his heart, he ain’t got nothing but love for me”

Pass defeats Caustic

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Recap: Basement battle between two seasoned vets, Pass and Caustic, is highlighted by a boatload of pointed personals, freestyles, rebuttals and fiery punchlines. Close throughout and competitive despite neither battler really being on their A-game, a more condensed and consistent with the barbs Pass edges rounds 1 and 2 to take the win.

Verdict: Pass (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Pass – “Ill give this boy the biz-ness [business] like rich, white parents!”

Arsonal da Rebal defeats Caustic

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Recap: Arsonal da Rebel and Caustic (who did really well despite having one day to prepare) battle for the crown of  “Who’s The Most Disrespectful?” in this one-rounder from KOTD. A close, personal and oft-times pretty heated (hey, as many times as Arsonal’s brought racist bars to battles with white dudes in the past, no one should be upset when a white dude turns around and does the same to him) battle throughout, despite a more consistent flow from (“How the fuck am I racist? I use such colorful language”) Caustic and a horrible “fanny pack” line from da Rebel, it’s Arsonal’s more formidable haymakers and variety with the bars that edges him the win.

Verdict: Arsonal (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Arsonal – “I’m disrespectful, I’ll walk in your house and shit everywhere…that’s a hoarder nigga”

Head Ice defeats Caustic

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Recap: Even against a well-equipped (“How you 50 years old making tracks that are garbage?, you gonna be the first rapper to die from natural causes”) jokester like Caustic, Head Ice’s repeated tales on urban theatrics, introspective machismo bars and (yes, he has a funny side) dope (“How ya sister call her slippers house shoes if she got ’em on at the corner store?”) one-liners along with fanged lines dipped in personals and an eccentric (“I keep the peace like I’m Sharif brother, I bang, but ain’t no set gonna find these colors”) thug life are too much for those obsessed with racial semantics versus the simple thesis of who rapped better. Indeed, much as Caustic’s collective witticism garnered plenty of guffaws, too much filler and average bars against Ice’s quantitative heat and variety also did him in.

Verdict: Head Ice (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Head Ice – “Fucking bird, when you go sniff coke your nose hit the table first”

Caustic defeats Aye Verb

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Synonym: Sorry, but as long as Aye Verb’s been in the game he has no business complaining about time to prepare for a battle, much less choking. Not that any of that mattered anyway, as Caustic, with a busload of elite bars, jokes (that Shotgun Suge line was hilarious), personals and wicked freestyles, was well on his way to a victory anyway. Hopefully, Verb got a nice paycheck for just showing up….literally.

Verdict: Caustic (W) 3-0

Best line: Caustic – “I mean this dude’s trippin’ like I can’t bag his broad cuz’ I’m white, until I put a cracker in her mouth like I’m the body of Christ”

Caustic defeats Cortez

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Recap: Never lacking for confidence all the while overwhelming his opponent with a boatload of mocking personals, gritty punchlines, witty barbs and potent schemes, in this 3-rounder from KOTD, Caustic makes going past the time limit a non-factor, easily beating back a mostly pedestrian Cortez in each round to score a 3-0.

Verdict: Caustic (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Caustic – “What does it say about you as a man when a bitch named Medusa can’t get your dick hard?!”

JC defeats Caustic

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Synopsis: JC takes the first two rounds with better (“I wasn’t even gonna take you bro’, I don’t even joke, they said it’s 4:20 I got all the weed you can blow, I said ‘bet’ [and] I don’t even smoke!”) bars over Caustic’s jokes and delivery (tho like JC said that ‘Boston’ line in round 3 was crazy mean and nice) for the win.

Verdict: JC (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Caustic – “So what you gonna do?, hit me with the 9 next, 5 techs, talk about killing people for 5 years and ain’t nobody died yet”

Caustic defeats John John da Don

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Synopsis: Caustic delivers a steady stream of jokes, personals, bars and even calls out a John John da Don still in heavy denial about his penchant for stealing bars, to take the win.

Verdict: Caustic (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Caustic – “This is Office Space, watch a white boy beat the shit out this copy machine!”

Dizaster and Caustic [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: Similar styles, similar wit and similar intensity in this Grind Time battle between Caustic and Dizaste, which sees them both go equally at it with the meanest personals, hip freestyles, race (Caustic: “I am whiter than the flag’s you use to surrender!”) jokes and fierce braggadocio bars. A two-round battle that should’ve easily been a 3, when considering the level of talent, with a share of haymakers and off-the-dome one-liners mixed in by each battler, each round was pretty even.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: Dizaster -“You’re a redneck, that gets nervous whenever he’s not near…a cold can of tall bear!”