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DNA defeats Serius Jones

Recap: Serius Jones’ return to the URL stage is a topsy-turvy one as after laying down and pretty much giving up the first round with a load of lackluster (“Take half your head off like Casio, and after that plastic around your face, I bet your G shock”) bars/schemes versus DNA’s steady (“You are one of the worse, word to Eric you in for a long Sermon, be smart, or see hawks [Seahawks] as soon as I call Sherman”) wordplay, fiery personals and aggressive bars, it looked like Mr. GTFOH was on his way to an easy 3-0. But out of nowhere Jones made things competitive in round two, although DNA shined with both his rebuttal (“Yo Serius Jones you fucking up a bad rhyme, nigga stop talking while I rap, you seen what happened last time!”) and punchline (“Your career should’ve been took a hike, Roethlisberger”) game, Jones edged the round with some righteous (“How could call me a hypocrite or front me ‘cuz I’m living lux and I never even act religious, but I prayed over every bag I sold, yeah I’m sacrilegious!”) haymakers and punchlines that finally hit. However, with a chance to win things in the 3rd round, Jones came apart again with mostly lame bars, name flips that fell totally flat thanks in part to getting his opponent’s government name (that’s ‘Eric St John’ NOT ‘Eric Wright’) wrong and spits a Queens scheme that came off hard, but lacked the linguistics to back it up. And while DNA’s 3rd wasn’t resounding either, at the end of the day he had much cleaner, (“Now Smack called me, I was getting some head, he said I got a battle for you and it might involve you getting some bread, I jumped up, grabbed my tooth out the water, pushed the bitch off the bed…”) funnier and consistent round.

Verdict: DNA (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Serius Jones – “I’mma tell y’all what GTFOH could stand for in your case…ok, it could be ‘Got The Face Of Hurt!'”