Recap: To be fair, I don’t think that Saint Mic’s flow is as slow and robotic as Stuey Newton would have you think it is. But other than the so-so impressions, Newton’s gambit on a lot of visceral guns bars, witty personals, righteous punchlines all coupled with a more condensed plus freestyle and rebuttal-lit 2nd round not only pays off, but more importantly gets him the win after a slow start from Saint Mic contributed to him losing the 1st round, before a dope and punch-heavy, but elongated turn in the 2nd helped the Nebraska battler lose the match. A pretty solid turn by both battlers in the 3rd round was equally potent enough to call a draw.
Verdict: Stuey Newton (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Stuey Newton – “You pop where?, I’ll sock him square in the eye, leave him sleep standing up…like a heroin high!”
Recap: Sure, Ace Amin was able to get an assist from opponent So Supa’s gritty/cocky stylings being impeded by a couple of slip-ups near the end of his turn. But in this gritty 1-rounder from CBG’s Battlegrounds, it’s still Ace who deserves the credit for putting in most of the work what with an aggressive round filled with hardbody missives, stifling bully bars, fiery anecdotes and visceral gun bars/punchlines that earned him the win.
Verdict: Ace Amin (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Ace Amin – “You?, ain’t ahead of nuthin’, I, am beheading something, he be like ‘nah, that shit ain’t about nuth…’, it’s something if I said it’s something!”
Recap: 40 B.A.R.R.S. can make it look so easy sometimes, dishing intricate punchlines at a rapid pace without breaking a sweat. And that’s certainly the case here as outside of a slip-up near the beginning of her turn, 40 uses some exquisite lyrical dexterity to beat a solid and aggressive, but not as consistently hitting Drugz in this intergender matchup from Do or Die Battle League.
Verdict: 40 B.A.R.R.S. (W) 1-0
Favorite line: 40 B.A.R.R.S. – “You like .5 on a scale, misdemeanor fuck you telling me?!”
Recap: Just not quite enough. From URL, a fiery and confident JC gives opponent Geechi Gotti all he can handle with a barrage of gritty (“I’m changing everything…like the moment you found out wrestling was fake!”) punchlines/gun bars, righteous (“bangers, mind-blowing darts on the afterlife and fiesty lyricism. But while JC was scoring a gang of 9’s with some 9.5’s and 10’s mixed in, a bullish and aggressive Gotti came prepped with 3 near flawless rounds. The Compton spitter giving a gut check to his Michigan adversary with a consistently spicy lot of stifling gun bars, real street talk, piercing personals, low-down, grimy punches/wordplay, rich storytelling and vicious name flips to take both rounds 1 and 3 (call the 2nd round debatable) for an impressive win.
Verdict: Geechi Gotti (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Geechi Gotti – “Look, I used to hold the shit sideways, I wasn’t feeling it, now it’s both hands on a handle, I’m double-dribbling!”
Recap: This Skytier Northwest 3-rounder sees a slow-starting Starr get busier and better with the punches as the battle proceeded to the point of even winning the 3rd round. However, by then it’d be too late as a gang of stinging punchlines, witty barbs and brazen personals by Real Deal in rounds 1 and 2 had already sealed the win for RD.
Verdict: Real Deal (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Real Deal – “You have the intelligence of a 4-year-old, the only times Starr’s goes over heads is the more you know!”
Recap: Dope 1-rounder between C3 and Coffee Brown sees the former get plenty lit with wit, spicy name flips, some potent wordplay and pointed braggadocio bars. However, it’s a more versatile Ms. Brown, delivering more consistent heat via spitfire punchlines, jaunty personals, visceral schemes, lofty haymakers and stinging set-ups, who ends up taking this one.
Verdict: Coffee Brown (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Coffee Brown – “You’re a dyke, you think we believe you shooting when shit get tough?, stop the fuss, you pull a strap, that shit never bust!”
Recap: When not entrenched with way too many Daylyt references/name flips, King Los makes for a solid effort here in this 3-rounder from RBE versus noted vet Head Ice. The West-coast industry rapper showing off swaths of jaunty lyricism and some intricate punchlines throughout the battle, while also scoring here and there with some daunting personals and racial pontifications. Still, Ice being Ice, the Harlem vet with his vaunted bully bars, abstract polemics and sometimes witty personals stayed in the battle, even if he was often hurt by his own penchant to spout nonsensical raps along with angles that were completely ill-assorted. And tho Loso had his own bouts of pedestrian bars, pointed Lux-isms that didn’t quite bite and plenty of filler, after taking a loss in round 1, the noted freestyle emcee’s ability to submit more ringing wordplay as well as more steady and potent shiners (including some nice off-the-dome darts) in the latter two rounds gets him the win here.
Verdict: King Los (W) 2-1
Favorite line: King Los – “I got a gun so big…it only exists in battle rap!”
Recap: In this 1-round Battle on the Beat matchup from CypherCity TV, Bonnie Godiva gets a little payback for her loss to C3 on QOTR some years back with 2 minutes of lyrical ecstasy, rapping in unison with the beat and pouncing on her mostly pedestrian opponent from jump with a barrage of hard-hitting punchlines to get the win.
Verdict: Bonnie Godiva (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Bonnie Godiva – “Either keep it PG or you’ll get Smacked like one!”
Recap: Rare is a classic round from someone who ends up losing the match, but QP’s 2nd round here, dedicated to his opponent’s choice of footwear, was a fire tutorial on (“Size 12?, well, I guess you’re putting your best foot forward!”) off-the-dome acumen and delivery. That said, a 3-round close punch-fest with fellow vet Young Kannon equates to a whole lot of witty bars, dope wordplay, stinging (YK: “Black Ice, milking you for nothing…that’s a wig voucher!”) personals and fierce schemes on both sides. But at the end of the day it’s a more consistent and haymaker inclined YK who takes rounds 1 and 3 to earn the win.
Verdict: Young Kannon (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Young Kannon – “Ever since you been hanging with Qleen, you been acting way too hard…off John Q, the nigger SONned you and gave you heart!”
Recap: Judging from his smile’s and head nod’s of approval throughout the battle, you just knew that Snake Eyez kicked the kind of shit that the veteran Math Hoffa likes: gritty street bars, flexing punchlines/gun bars, steady in-ya-face aggression and little to nothing when it came to the resident name flips Math normally hears. However, after splitting the first two rounds with Math, Snake’s elongated rounds, quixotic personals and lastly, a surprise tag-in by Hoffa’s ex, Bonnie Godiva, would slowly lead to his downfall. First Hoffa, who has struggled with keeping his flow together of late, managed to stay in his bag with enough witty barbs, potent personals, steely bully/gun (“I’ll raise these two arms and have them kicking like a musty nigga!”) semantics, nicer angles and haymakers to edge a more condensed round 1, before a solid round 2 is only edged by Snake having the (“Morgan Freeman, Mountain Dew [claps his hands], I’ll show you how to put a legend on ice!”) best bar of the round. The deciding round 3 is a competitive and a highly entertaining one with both battlers spitting juicy punches, rich performance bars, fiery schemes and visceral (Snake Eyez: “Nigga’s have all those blind jokes, till they eating smushed down pea’s!”) jabs. But after already dishing a hard turn, Snake’s choice to go extra with a blown-up photo prop, unexpectedly getting his Young X on with a ‘Get ‘Em!’ roast session and the aforementioned cameo by Ms. Godiva would backfire as a Hoffa not known for a rebuttal game, would start his turn with a couple of fire (“And as far as Bonnie, you really wanna go the rhyming route?, you taking about eating ass?!, I watch your battles, you got other nigga’s shit coming out your mouth!”) rebuts before seguing into a plethora of nasty written’s, Lux-inspired pontifications and real street banter (altogether a classic turn) to edge the round and take the battle.
Verdict: Math Hoffa (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Math Hoffa – “See, what you do with your battle money, you go buy some clothes, maybe cop you a chain, so ya bum ass could look fly while you hopping the train, nigga, you real corny, for everybody that take care of their kids, that’s real glory, you can’t feed yourself, what you gonna feed a kid, a jail story?!”
Recap: Jakkboy Maine versus Steams reps for the first URL/Smack “Banned” battle and it’s a doozy as Steams’ crafty wordplay for the most part, competes well with Jakkboy’s electrifying darts and righteous performance bars. Looking back however, this one comes down to the second round as a tight and sizzling on both sides 1st gets edged Jakbboy’s more potent, versatile and consistent heaters, while Steams takes the 3rd with a more condensed, lyrical and gritty turn to beat back what was a less satisfying and elongated round from Jakkboy. And while a dope and competitive throughout Steams came through with a solid 2nd, it’s Jakkboy’s exhilarating set-ups, witty N.Y. trolling, fiery name flips and the scintillating execution of his bars that makes the round the only decisive one, with the Richmond, VA rapper getting the win by taking it easy.
Verdict: Jakkboy Maine (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Jakkboy Maine – “[Bwoh!] his name Steams, but when it disappear, who really miss it that much?!”
Recap: A fire, haymaker-drenched, Mexican-lit and (“Paranormal activity, I had lay powder down so you can see my next step!”) punch-heavy 2nd round from Don Marino serves as the best round of this PG battle versus Gunpowder Patt. But one too many repeated themes and a surprising 1st round choke from Marino along with GP’s witty(“You look like you got bullied in class all ya life…nigga, you was home-schooled!”) musings, solid personals and fiery 4-bar set-up’s/fierce schemes in the 1st and 3rd rounds gives the We Go Hard grad an earnest win.
Verdict: Gunpowder Patt (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Gunpowder Patt – “Drug bars, y’all know that saying, ‘Step on a crack, break ya mama back’?, yeah I see that shit real clear, in the trap, so much crack getting stepped on my mom in a wheelchair!”
Recap: If Swavatar Jack really was waiting to a long time to battle Chef Trez, it certainly showed as the Atlanta Battle Rap spitter came through with some fire (“Bon appetite, put the Mil in a Chef plate, feast your eyes!”) punchlines (mostly in round 1) and gritty wordplay to make this 3-rounder competitive. But a few too many dry spots from Jack and Chef Trez being Chef Trez what with a boatload to rich set-ups, fiery gun bars, spirited name flips, stinging (“You was bugging me for years about being Chef Life, I did the nigga foul, put up a ‘Not Hiring’ sign, when Jack put in the app, I shut the kitchen down!”) personals and just to throw them in there, a couple of fire rebuttals, just ends up being too much for the begrudging Jack to pull off the upset.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “We can’t get real jobs, a drug test?, nigga we passing scales!”
Recap: Unafraid to stamp her mark in the female battle rap game, hitting with visceral punches left and right all the while dishing some extra heat with piercing name flips as well as hard gun bars, E-Hart easily beats back a solid at times, but inconsistent Ms. Miami in this 1-rounder from Step Your Ink Game Up.
Verdict: E-Hart (W) 1-0
Favorite line: E-Hart – “I threw her in the trunk, where no one could hear the screams, then burnt the body, in a dark place where nobody care or seen [kerosene]!”
Recap: Two talents like J. Murda and Fettuccine 20 should not be battling each other for only one round. But here they do anyway and as should be expected, they both put on quite a show, each spitting some stealth-worthy bars, spirited personals, lofty gun lines as well as displaying the occasional wit. A close one, no doubt, but Murda with a cleaner flow, performance-heavier and a slightly more condensed turn, gets the edge in this one.
Verdict: J. Murda (W) 1-0
Favorite line: J. Murda – “Head shot…this the game winner!”
Recap: While J. Murda definitely got robbed by judges in his infamous JC battle a couple of years back, the feeling here in this judged battle (coincidentally, like Murda vs. JC, also on RBE) is that B. Magic got a little jerked here. A tight 3-rounder that was extra impressive when you consider that both battlers had only 8 days notice to prepare, after splitting the earlier rounds, while Murda had his moments via an aggressive and performance-heavy turn that certainly made waves, B. Magic, with a more consistent and of course, punch/wordplay-heavy framework, gets the 3rd and the win here.
Verdict: B. Magic (W) 2-1
Favorite line: B. Magic – “Fuck who I Disturb and this piece [Peace] is not Ludacris [ludicrous], I’ll leave him Smokey on the side of the house…’cuz I do this shit!”
Recap: Before we get the recap out the way, let’s admit that the ‘dunk’ on Shotgun Suge in round 3 by Glueazy was pretty epic–a high vertical leap with some nice velocity to it–that’s the way to get it done. And who said white men can’t jump? That said, despite the theatrics and some superb (“Don’t try saving him, the .357 is titanium, crack his chest open, I’m looking for vibranium!”) wordplay/punchlines by Glu throughout the battle, it’s a more consistently spitfire Suge who edges every round here. The veteran Suge showing that aggressive moxie plus sizzling bars can beat almost anybody, especially when he displays unfailing focus to go along with some stellar personals, witty heaters, hometown crowd-pleasing lines, fierce performance bars and potent (“Two 30s pop, son ain’t seen a shooter in North Carolina since Dell Curry!”) gun/bully bars. Indeed, a pretty solid, but at times pedestrian showing by Glueazy gets beat by a Shotgun Suge who reminded everyone why experience matters.
Verdict: Shotgun Suge (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Shotgun Suge – “If you do anything to that black boy they gonna have to nurse you, and I better not hear you making him do H&M commercials!”
Recap: As Danny Myers would say: “Yikes!” Yet, another choke by Nu Jerzey Twork, here in this 3-rounder versus a loud, hitting at times and aggressive (pardon the NJT impressions) Buttah From Da Block. However, a more bodacious, eccentric with the gun lines and consistent with the punches Twork does enough in the first couple of rounds to dismiss his final round collapse and gain the win.
Verdict: Nu Jerzey Twork (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Nu Jerzey Twork – “Pipe in the sock, .22’s on a rifle to prop…you ain’t see Ketchup vs. Mustard? [bwoh!], this nigga Buttah doing life in the box!”
Recap: The 5-0 resembling Deast scores with some hot punchlines here and there, but when a personal/scheme/punch-heavy Chilla Jones dropped the acronym haymaker on his opponent like midway through his round, you kind of sensed that this one was over. And it was.
Verdict: Chilla Jones (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Chilla Jones – “And I just heard you had a drug problem, what a misfit, went through them 12 steps so many times, he broke his Fitbit!”
Recap: In this fire one-rounder from Do or Die Battle League, bar-wise, both (“‘But I like to name my guns!’, where I’m from you only name a gun after a nigga you used it on!”) Quban and (“Try to run, just know that I peel with focus, I’m an Adderall lover!”) Ryda deliver the goods with an equal share of killer gun bars, momentous punchlines, stifling performance lines and dope personals. Still, while Ryda might’ve came with a little more consistency with the bars and more versatile material, a couple of mid-round slip-ups and a surprising choke by Ryda hands Quban the win.
Verdict: Quban (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Quban – “If Brian got a gun, he better pull it, ‘cuz while he was busy trying to name it, I was busy writing your name on the bullet!”
Recap: Not that he wasn’t bountiful with the haymakers, but a surprising freestyle/rebuttal game ends up saving Cortez from a loss here in what was a fire and competitive battle versus Ryda. Indeed, after an entertaining, (“I’m a hybrid, Ryda [rider], ain’t no gas in the clutch!”) personal-heavy/name-flip and braggadocio turn from Cortez to start things out in the first, Mr. I Like To Name My Guns comes right back with an aggressive, (“They say no fingers, no evidence, Gary Payton, O.J. Simpson, I brought both gloves for Cort!”) gun-savvy and spitfire turn of his own that with a couple of more haymakers, edges the Goonie member the round. Still, after a spazzing-on-both-sides first, things settled down a little bit in the 2nd round. But while Ryda was a little more consistently nice with his punchlines/personals/gun bars, a couple of solid freestyles by Cor towards the beginning of his turn and only one less haymaker gets him a draw for the round. With Ryda still ahead going into the final round, Cortez really gets in his bag of haymakers, crisply working his vaunted ‘Shit We Gotta Speak About’ angles to ill effect with some dope wordplay, fiery shots at Ryda’s team, a couple of rebuttals, fire Spanish idioms and more salacious (“I’m flaming out the projects, banging out with targets, 50 sparking, Ricky Martin, this shit just came out the closet!”) punchlines/gun bars mixed in to beat back what was also a turned-up and punch-heavy, but not quite as potent turn by Ryda.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Ryda – “Just because you out of arm’s length don’t mean I can’t bring you pain, just because you out of reach, don’t mean you out of range!”
Recap: Here in this 3-rounder from KOTD, the unorthodox, sardonic stylings of Copasetic are lit enough to take round 1, before a seemingly distracted and ‘begging’ to be beat Marvwon stays in vet mode with some stifling punchlines and witty barbs to pull off the comeback against a single-themed opponent who didn’t have the wherewithal to keep up with his convoluted prose.
Verdict: Marvwon (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Marvwon – “Everybody thinks it’s Planet of the Apes until they see I play Caesar, and I’m like Steve Francis, I ain’t come to Vancouver to play either!”
Recap: A ‘Priorities’-missing and (thankfully) ‘pause’-less X-Factor returns to the URL stage from a brief hiatus and puts forth a strong showing here against Jerry Wess with a gang of stifling punchlines/schemes, heated (“That Glock .20, long clip, it’ll finally hit his scalp and bullets will spit out Jerry like Tom finally caught the mouse!”) gun bars and some fire name flips/metaphors that more than proved that if there was any questions about ring rust, the Detroit vet had none. That said, Mr Wess was just better here…in every round. Using an entertaining mix of fiery wordplay, witty (“If it wasn’t for me, Smack would be denying you, with a nose like that, I envy whoever supplying you!”) punches and sometimes with the help of his friends, salacious performance bars that had the crowd roaring, Jerry Wess does it all while earning a 30 in a battle that to give X credit was still closer than the final score indicates.
Verdict: Jerry Wess (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Jerry Wess – “Just ‘cuz you never seen me before, don’t make me new nigga, your new girl my old girl, I was X [ex] before you nigga!”
Recap: In this competitive 1-rounder from Black Ice Cartel, despite a boatload of fiery punchlines, festive gun bars and manhood mocking personals from Viixen The Assassin, one too many dry spots from Viixen and a more consistently wordplay-heavy/witty/personal punch game by Showstoppa gets Show the win.
Verdict: Showstoppa (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Showstoppa – “And if I hit, the gang hit…it’s a party and we in this bitch!”
Recap: I’m guessing that there’s a pretty good reason, even tho this battle took place before his battle with Murda Mook, that RBE chose to drop this battle on YouTube afterwards: Pat Stay just kills Verb here. At his wittiest and punch-heavy best, the Canadian vet took the over the crowd with a swarm of too funny personals, mean (“Make him look like a little boy, like Jaz naked!”) barbs and spitfire punchlines throughout his 3 rounds, leaving Verb, while mostly solid but with too much of a bent towards lyrical showmanship (with little haymakers), preachy soundbites, 2 subpar ‘Showtime’ schemes and of course, when facing a white battler: race quotables that we’ve long heard before. But hey, with Mook up next, it’s hard to be too mad at Verb for not giving this battle his best effort.
Verdict: Pat Stay (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Pat Stay – “I ain’t got one person here with me, but look at me dog, seriously, If I kill you right now…when the cops come, they’ll just think I’m security!”
Recap: A couple of nice rebuttals and heated punchlines by Xcel makes things competitive, but a cleaner, witty throughout and set-up/personal-heavy turn by Cable Guy gives the latter the edge in this one-rounder from Colosseum Battle League.
Verdict: Cable Guy (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Cable Guy – “You oughta be top tier, main stage, making classics, but on your road to Summer Madness, you got stuck in Traffic!”
Recap: Never let it be said that Chilla Jones won’t battle in your hood as here we see the veteran Boston battler traveling all the way to New Mexico for 3 rounds with local spitter Biz. Put aside all the loud chatter in the background from the crowd throughout the match as well as Jones reaching a couple of times with crowd participation efforts that went nowhere, a pretty solid, witty and punch-heavy at times battle ensued with the name flip/gun bar/scheme-spazzing Jones easily taking the first two rounds from his inconsistent opponent for the win before a debatable 3rd.
Verdict: Chilla Jones (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Chilla Jones – “I’ll treat you like an airplane seat with my gat, you wanna why?…’cuz when I lft the tray [.3] you’ll see a magazine in his back!”
Recap: Gates of the Garden co-owner C Low has been putting in work as a battler for a minute now. And through the use of feisty punchlines, a consistent flow, fiery (“So pay attention, I learned a head shot can get you more views than main venting!”) gun bars and real street jargon, Low almost always offers a solid performance such as this one against a punch-heavy and vigorous Beddafi Green, where in addition to the aforementioned arsenal, Low displays some witty personals to come back and force a tie in the deciding 3rd round after the two split the first two.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Beddafi Green – “This is what you get when you call me out, you ain’t know that I walk around with rounds that could take a whole army out, or I’ll put a hawker out, mark your whole body down, zig zag across your body, now you Charlie Brown!”
Recap: Assisted by an up-n-down, name flip excessive opponent who rapped twice as long as he did, a more condensed Your Honor also supplies enough fiery wit, mayhem and righteous punchlines to beat back a solid Bear Witnez and take this 1-rounder from Bring Ya Barz Battle League.
Verdict: Your Honor (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Your Honor – “I’m from the District, with a 4-piece on me and a McChicken, sitting in his car, waiting on the nigga…like a ticket!”
Recap: Another one of those battles that’s a lot closer than what the comments section will tell you. But in this 3-rounder from Bar Fight Battle League, the ever-competitive A. Ward still pulls off a minor upset over the always hard to beat Geechi Gotti. Using a plethora of righteous punchlines, some fierce personals, witty (“One Tech, you trash, man you the idol they watch?, you got locked up and out of jail before the microwave stopped!”) barbs, one more haymaker and a nifty freestyle towards the end of his round, the Christian rapper manages to edge the 1st round before getting beat by a more condensed, raucous, shit-talking and gun bar (“Nina with me, I been through everything with this bitch, I think it’s time we settle down!”) spazzing Gotti in the 2nd. The deciding 3rd round was thisclose with Gotti going at length on his opponent’s spirituality vs. his own belief system, all the dishing fiery punches during a turn that was only hurt by some recycled themes and Geechi’s nimble attempt at freestyling (which, for the most part were really unnecessary). Any holes in Gotti’s 3rd would be taken advantage of by a more consistent Ward, who along with potent sermons/personals that spoke to the heart of Geechi’s gangster lifestyle, would deliver a series of loud barking religious zingers and bodacious shiners to edge the round
Verdict: A. Ward (W) 2-1
Favorite line: A. Ward – “You dead, it’s over in fact, your slogan is when it’s real you can see it in their eye’s…makes a lot of sense that yours stayed closed when you rap!”
Recap: Dealing all sorts of mayhem and dishing on some eerie situations with his massive load of guns bars, Chef Trez easily puts a hurting on Dubb Da Feenom’s loud, but less potent raps, that is before a late round choke by Dubb ends things for good.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “Let’s switch the plot, I’m in front of his doorsteps, through his house giving shots, the irony, as soon as the pound hit the door, the nigga knock!”
Recap: Maybe one day somebody will be kind enough to come up with a percentage on how many times ‘Hitman’s little brother!’ ShowOut was mentioned in a Bill Collector battle since their incident some years back. That said, in this 1-rounder from GOTG, a BC equipped with a gang of raucous gun bars, fiery/witty personals and consistently gritty punchlines makes easy work of an aggressive, but overall much less substantive Zay Smoove.
Verdict: Bill Collector (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Bill Collector – “See, I’m just rolling pass the bases I’m a ground ball, all them people riding with you?, that’s a clown car!”
Recap: In this rare battle over beats, both Chef Trez and Bandana Boogie show off their ability to switch up cadence’s and spout rhymes over a variety of popular Hip-Hop rhythm’s from days past. Close throughout with each battler dishing a barrage of rigid braggadocio lines, stinging name flips, spitfire punches and fiery set-ups, it’s a standout 2nd round turn by Trez that edges out the battle when you call the 1st and 3rd debatables.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “Old school shooter with revolvers, keep a magnum like your big sister dresser!”
Recap: Snake Eyez clearly did his research for this one, using some fiery personals to go along with his usual assortment of gritty punchlines and stinging gun bars to beat a pretty solid throughout, but not near as potent Shawn Hoffa in this dope one-rounder from Showtime Battle Arena.
Verdict: Snake Eyez (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Snake Eyez – “When it gets real, keep your lips sealed, or get your shit spilled, puts your hands up little nigga, I wish this bitch will, this right will give you your eye the best cookie ever…Ms. Fields!”
Recap: With Big T unable to get in his bag while transfixed on hit-n-miss punches throughout this battle, a civic-minded and nice with the punches Ooops survives a couple of near-chokes to take advantage of his opponent’s mediocrity and edge rounds 1 plus 3 for a win on the KOTD stage.
Verdict: Ooops (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Ooops – “I’m the man in my city and yours, you ain’t the one they admire, you Stefon Marbury you’ll have to move from the crib ti get your jersey retired!”
Recap: In a battle that was loaded with plenty of Bad Boy Records and Dot Mobb references, K-Shine versus E. Ness from The Battle Academy in Philly still made for a solid showing with both battlers kicking spicy darts throughout. However, at the end of the day this one would prove to be all Shine as after kicking a spitfire, punch-heavy 1st round that reeked with haymakers, the Harlem vet just proved to be hsrder with his bars, using eccentric Philly references, hot schemes, fiery performance darts and some wicked punchlines/gun bars to beat back a mostly pedestrian Ness in the latter rounds and walk away with a 30.
Verdict: K-Shine (W) 3-0
Favorite line: K-Shine – “Two arms behind him like my baby took his first step!”
Recap: If you’re Furious Styles you gotta be pretty disappointed at that 1st round choke, because those hardbody punchlines, boastful barbs and salacious personals Ms. Styles was kicking in the latter rounds definitely made this battle interesting. Still, even with her opponent making for a solid comeback, Yoshi G still did more than enough to earn this one on her own, dishing 3 straight rounds of fierce 4-bar setups, braggadocio zingers, witty personals and ringing name flips/wordplay to take the first two rounds before a 3rd round debatable.
Verdict: Yoshi G (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Yoshi G – “Don’t let that burn, Furious Styles gonna die from Tre [.3] pop!”
Recap: Jakkboy Maine pollutes the air with ringing gun sounds, salient name flips and stirring (“I caught him a Home Alone set-up y’all…and my trap now Booming like a bitch!”) punchlines to beat back a gritty and (“This shit will kick off from the door…Mister Rogers!”) punch-heavy, but elongated and not as consistent Kaboom in this one-rounder from The Battle Academy.
Verdict: Jakkboy Maine (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Jakkboy Maine – “He started croaking, then I let go of Boom under water, that’s an implosion!”
Recap: For his comeback Murda Mook should’ve took Tsu Surf. That’s really the consensus here after watching this hour-and-a-half long battle between Mook and Aye Verb that was not only way too long, but drenched with filler and littered all over the place with pedestrian bars from both participants. Then too, besides Mook making his much-heralded comeback and a couple of old battle vets finally facing off against each other, what was the point here? Especially what with Mook’s continual narrative over the years stating that he can hang with the new guys…again, he should’ve battled Surf.
As for the battle itself, competitive by default with an undoubtedly record-setting 3rd round from Mook and way too much extra shit what with all the touching and machismo going on throughout it. And tho frequent bouts of elongated schemes, mediocre bars and quite a few reaches would hurt the match, for the most part the crowd (esp. Jaz the Rapper) was into it. And both Mook and Verb would dazzle at times with fiery punchlines, wily personals, braggadocio shiners and many a provocative dart. Verb, at his best when he flexed with stinging personals and rich storyline bars, would easily surmount his opponent on haymakers to take round 1, before Mook, aggressive and never lacking (“Yeah, I’m feeling myself like I don’t know where my phone at!”) for confidence throughout despite 3 inconsistent rounds, would match Verb on overall potency to make the 2nd round debatable. And despite Mook delivering 10-15 rounds of bars in one overlong 3rd, after a bit of a slow start it’s Verb who gives Mook a searing talking to, via a gang of fierce set-ups, schemes and mocking (“I was reading your transcript and it said, you got a problem with Math, well it’s ok, just don’t let it beat you over ya head!”) personals, to handily take the round and win the battle.
Verdict: Aye Verb (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Aye Verb – “It’s time to eat, I’m a throw noodles like a college student!”
Recap: Much hyped battle of two ‘Champions’ doesn’t necessarily live up to the billing (unless you want to count O-Red and T-Top almost getting into it and a tag-in to Nu Jerzey Twork by Red in the 3rd) as while lyricism, personals, mayhem and punches were at the forefront, anyone who has followed both DNA and O-Red’s career has certainly seen better from each. Still, the battle was close and competitive (I got a more versatile DNA edging the 1st and a surprisingly more-condensed-than-usual Red doing the same in the 2nd even if a couple of those gun bars were influenced by Twork) throughout with DNA getting the edge here in the deciding 3rd with a more consistent and solid turn that with a couple of freestyles and a very nice tooth scheme on top, beat back O-Red’s mostly so-so attempts at humor and less potent bars in the same round. Not to mention, the Twork tag-in was a little puzzling when you consider the strength of DNA’s rebuttal game.
Verdict: DNA (W) 2-1
Favorite line: DNA – “You was always in the back row and the last to grow, you like wisdom teeth!”
Recap: Chilla Jones makes it look way too easy here, using a plethora of sublime punchlines, hitting multi’s, piercing name flips and daunting gun bars to easily beat back a persevering, but mostly mediocre with the punches Shine9 in this 3-rounder from Smoked Out Battles.
Verdict: Chilla Jones (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Chilla Jones – “Boy, with the toy I’ll aim and pull it, two different.9’s, that ain’t Nerf I’m giving this New Wave a bullet!”
Recap: With Dre Dennis announcing at the beginning of this video that some of the audio got lost during Dougy’s turn, despite a fire turn from Eazy the Block Captain here, don’t feel it’d be fair to recap this battle.
Recap: After taking on some hot punches and rugged schemes/personals from G-Souldier, a confident Big Kannon goes on a fierce spree of piercing punchlines/wordplay, sizzling name flips and witty barbs to beat back his opponent in this 1-rounder from Rotation Hip-Hop.
Verdict: Big Kannon (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Big Kannon – “He’s weak and I ain’t listenong to shit dude telling me, don’t matter if you spit and it’s relentless, you get the business, bitch you already know what’s up…like women’s intuition!”
Recap: Even with a not-so-great, but solid 1st round and a 2nd round that while hitting with effective punchlines, witty schemes/personals and bully bars all over the spot, was still beatable considering his opponent’s capability, for two rounds Math Hoffa does more than enough to beat back a mostly subpar, redundant theme-dishing and filler prone Real Deal. And tho the punchline/scheme crazy RD we’re used to seeing finally showed up to easily take the 3rd, by then it was too late.
Verdict: Math Hoffa (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Math Hoffa – “You trash Trevor, and I know you been knew that shit, I found his rap book at the hotel, I picked it up and threw that shit, a couple of minutes later raccoons was going through that shit, I swear I heard on read a line and the rest of ’em boo’ed that shit!”
Recap: IMBL 3-rounder finds local spitter Steve McSwain earnestly contributing with a boatload of gritty punches/gun bars, some hard street rhymes and brazen/witty barbs. Still, in spite of a solid effort from his opponent, a well-equipped Aye Verb earns his bag with a gang of spicy hustler-themed punches, mocking personals and belittling vet talk to take rounds 1 and 3 (call round 2 debatable) for the win.
Verdict: Aye Verb (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Aye Verb – “I ain’t say your name in two rounds yet…’cuz I forgot it!”
Recap: Even with Bankhead rapping twice as long as his opponent, in this fiery 1-rounder from Black Ice Cartel against the also highly energetic Drugz, the future NWX member’s higher percentage of stinging (tho a bit excessive at times) name flips, potent gun bars, rapid mayhem and gritty, oft-performance heavy punchlines are enough to beat a pretty solid, but not as consistent showing from his opponent.
Verdict: Bankhead (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Bankhead – “What happened to that Drugz with substance? that’s the nigger people was actually feening with, how the fuck your name supposed to be Drugz with no active ingredient?!?”
Recap: From Premier Rap Battle League, an entertaining, versatile and often set-up/punch-heavy 1-rounder between 3SK and Bill Collector stayed close till BC (who might’ve been on his way to a win) started to recycle a bunch of bars towards the end of his round, in turn assisting the more original and steadily hitting 3SK to gain the win.
Verdict: 3SK (W) 1-0
Favorite line: 3SK – “See, me and Deast, gave this league a classic when we battled each other, so Premier said they always got a plate for me like an Italian mother!”
Recap: Using some potent wordplay, hard-hitting schemes and a gang of piercing punchlines to out-rap a lyrical opponent who was much nicer here with the personals than the punches, outside of a debatable 2nd round, Chilla Jones easily beats back Canadian rapper Illipsis in the 1st and 3rd rounds to take this 3-rounder from KOTD.
Verdict: Chilla Jones (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Chilla Jones – “The flow iller, and they used to call me boring well…save that for the old Chilla, when they compare me to NyQuil now, bitch that’s ‘cuz I’m a cold killer!”
Recap: Wily vet Craig Lamar dishes just enough heated punchlines and ringing set-ups to push back the slow, unorthodox stylings of a much less intricate Rob Blanks in this one-rounder from Gates of the Garden.
Verdict: Craig Lamar (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Craig Lamar – “Bitch I’ll make ya grandmama bite the curve, stand on her scalp, and keep putting my foot down like I’m the man of the house!”
Recap: With 3 rounds of basic raps that might’ve worked in say….2005, Germany battle rapper Tierstar not only fails to provide any competition in this TopTier Takeover battle versus Pat Stay, but such a poor effort here can make one re-think watching battles in which a no-name, wannabee up-n-comer pays to battle a top-tier. As for Pat, tho we’d get the usual gang of derisive jokes/personals, performance-enhanced barbs and hardbody punches in the 1st round, from there, matched up against such a subpar opponent, who could blame him for getting bored and just wanting to be done with this thing what with his continued crowd trolling, sometimes lazy raps/freestyles and condensed turns in both rounds 2 and 3? Indeed, so bad was Tierstar that Pat caught another bodybag anyway.
Verdict: Pat Stay (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Pat Stay – “Tierstar, who gave you that name?, take off ya hat it should be 50 shades of gray!”
Recap: A couple of roundhouse, heavy-punching/scheming and personal-drenched rounds by Charlie Clips gets him another win that still yet, may leave one scratching their head a little on how Clips has the uncanny ability to pull victories out of tight spots. In this case, surviving a pretty weak 2nd round that was blown away even more by a tremendous and vociferous turn by Ave. Or how about a close 1st round that Clips only edges because for some reason Ave chose to go overkill with bully bars on an opponent who’s never made his name pretending to be of that ilk? And of course, a deciding 3rd that while he most likely would’ve won anyway, because he’s Charlie Clips and he’s that nice when he wants to be. Yet still, for some inconceivable reason (perhaps, overconfidence?) Ave cuts short his turn and barely spits half a round. Indeed, you can’t make this stuff up.
Verdict: Charlie Clips (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Charlie Clips – “My nigga Roc, could’ve been Thanos, but he messed up when he built his squad around this PG, he from Maryland, you from Virginia, so why would we Marvel who based around D.C.?!”
Recap: Deftly punching back-to-back-to-back like her life depended on it, 40 B.A.R.R.S. takes down all-comers, even opponent Gutta’s family members when she wasn’t spouting fire wordplay, piercing personals, braggadocios zingers and swinging gun bars during this 1-rounder from Premier Rap Battle League. The loud and raucous Gutta, even if he got off to a slow start what with a Lil Mama obsession in the beginning of his round, still managed to keep things entertaining with some hot punches/performance bars here and there, but with such a topsy-turvy run overall, stood no chance of beating back 40’s more consistently spicy round.
Verdict: 40 B.A.R.R.S. (W) 1-0
Favorite line: 40 B.A.R.R.S. – “Y’all got Premiere’s front man like he got his bars up?, well it’s like I’m trying to gentrify the hood when I give your up and coming star bucks [Starbucks]!”
Recap: No ‘Strapped IN!’ bars, but still 5 minutes of utter mayhem, gritty wordplay and distinctive gun bars from Nu Jerzey Twork in this 1-rounder from WAU Battle League. And even with some recycled bars from Twork, it’s still all enough to beat back an SDK, who while rapping twice as long as his opponent, was able to dish some solid punches here and there, but too much filler, reaches and pedestrian name flips helped help lead to his demise.
Verdict: Nu Jerzey Twork (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Nu Jerzey Twork – “I’ll bang a pair, breeze in the house, call Steve on the couch…thinking chair!”
Recap: Raining down a host of spirited anecdotes, but failing to tie most of them together, a verbally spastic Daylyt goes in the heat of Loso’s way more cohesive punchlines, aggressive name flips/wordplay and stifling personals.
Verdict: Loso (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Loso – “Ya woke, but not conscious…ya sleepwalking!”
Recap: Hindsight is 20/20, but damn if Dre Dennis had chosen to spread out some of those hard-hitting and witty personals he used in the 3rd earlier in this battle against G Lowe. Because that could’ve been the difference here in what turned out to be a pretty competitive and close match after a one-sided 1st round. Instead, by relying too heavily on his standard usage of gun bars (which were hit-n-miss here) and hurt by a few reaches in both the 1st and 2nd rounds, even while getting back on his grind in the latter half of the middle round, it was too late for Dre, esp. when it came to going up against G Lowe’s consistently combative, but also exquisite punch game in the early rounds. The ‘Gun Bars n Glasses’ rapper, after putting together a sublime 1st round, coming back with another dope turn in the 2nd that featured a variety of piercing personals, cocky heat and flexing punches to gain the win, before Dre’s personal-driven comeuppance in the 3rd allowed him to avoid getting 30’d.
Verdict: G Lowe (W) 2-1
Favorite line: G Lowe – “It’s one button on the stick…I brought Atari back!”
Recap: Someone might want to tell The Saurus that E-Ness said his face looks like coffee cake, not ‘cheese cake’. Or maybe The Saurus knew that anyway and yet was just feening to get in yet another ‘cheese cake’ pun on his opponent. Still, with a gang of solid punchlines, rich performance bars and some witty barbs mixed in, it’s an inspired Ness who one up’s fellow vet, but a wily inconsistent The Saurus in rounds 1 and 3 to earn a win on the KOTD stage.
Verdict: E-Ness (W) 2-1
Favorite line: E-Ness – “The Saurus, why you force it?, it doesn’t come out natural, your flow sounds robotic and it lacks replay value!”
Recap: The hoodie taken off (we see you Calicoe) completes the comeback in what was a haymaker-filled, performance-heavy and personal/punchline/wordplay (“I’m at your crib, he like ‘It ain’t gonan be that tho!’ [bwoh!] yes it is!”) stifling, classic 3rd round from Nu Jerzey Twork. Indeed, after a pedestrian, slip-up prone 1st that was cut short, much less had zero chance of beating a solid, (“Your flow low-key blah, blah, my emoji monster’s, I’m solo with it, I never need a staff, I ain’t Loki partna!”), posturing and punch-heavy ‘Vegan Verb’, Twork literally turned it up, stunting heavy with a consistently rapid, gun bar execution in the 2nd, before the aforementioned spitfire 3rd finished the mission.
Verdict: Nu Jerzey Twork (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Nu Jerzey Twork – “One hit from this MC Hammer [emcee hammer] like Have You Seen Her?, if I had to arm you in a casket hugging the body, the Macarena [mac will ring ya]!”
Recap: In a tale of one guy (Franchise) for the most part sticking to what he does really well: performance rich while dishing potent gun bars and fiery trap talk and another (Prep) straying away from what he does well: freestyles, rebuttals and trendy punchlines/schemes, the former easily gets the win. Not that Franchise didn’t attempt to be more versatile here, mixing in a few spicy personals and punch-heavy darts/schemes along the way. But with Prep (outside a pretty solid 1st round) off-balance and filler-prone throughout, his Canadian opponent’s steady and aggressive heat could only add up to a 30.
Verdict: Franchise (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Franchise – “You watching Spongebob with your daughter?, I’ll ease my way in your crib then I turn it off, with a big clip, she can’t watch this, it’s Rated R!”
Recap: From We Go Hard, a couple of dope impressions and a gang of righteous heat from Lootchi still wasn’t enough to beat back a versatile Bill Collector, who when he wasn’t dropping some fire freestyles, scored left and right with a plethora of winsome punchlines, witty barbs, stinging performance bars/set-ups and even some rigid wordplay to get the win in this fiery 1-rounder.
Verdict: Bill Collector (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Bill Collector – “I’ll catch you while you playing 2K, playoff shit, and start fucking up your game like I’m J.R. Smith!”
