No Bias. No Narratives.
Recap: Two round Grind Time promo battle between John John Da Don and Bravo goes JJDD’s way pretty handily as the Yonkers, NY rapper scathing personals and flexing punch game easily beats back a gritty, but mediocre effort from his opponent.
Verdict: John John Da Don (W) 2-0
Favorite line: John John Da Don – “Fuck his girlfriend ‘cuz he probably the only nigger that hasn’t yet!”
Recap: Finally, a Grind Time battle where all the judges (and me) were on the same page as John John Da Don uses just about every Asian stereotype he could find to out-punch a witty at times, but mostly pedestrian Passda in the first two rounds for the win before JJDD pretty much gives up on getting a 30 to instead dish on some much-needed rants on how Grind Time judges battles.
Verdict: John John Da Don (W) 2-1
Favorite line: John John Da Don – “All his Chinese chicken is really Siamese kittens!”
Synopsis: I agree with the judges (funny watching Swave Sevah and Iron Solomon judging battles) as this was an easy win for Lotta Zay who came with better punchlines, meaner consistent bars and nicer name flips all throughout. Clearly, John John has a lot of growing to do.
Verdict: Lotta Zay (W) 3-0
Best line: Lotta Zay – “His man crying like why you hit him in the mouth for?, he came from the dirty so I hit him with the southpaw!”
Recap: Yet another judge’s mishap from Grind Time as a sometimes filler-prone, but punch-heavier and more versatile John John Da Don clearly took rounds 1 and 3 here from an inconsistent 30/30 for the win. But Grind Time being Grind Time, amongst 5 judge’s, only Direct gets the decision right. Thus, an OT round that shouldn’t have taken place allows a more prepared 30/30 to get the “win’ as well as JJDD’s $400 bucks.
Verdict: John John Da Don (W) 2-1 (not including OT round)
Favorite line: John John Da Don – “Why 30/30?, you don’t aim for them crosses, you probably got your name from your age and your losses!”
Recap: Outside of a 2nd round choke, John John Da God stays nice with his, spouting a barrage of piercing punchlines, witty barbs and fiery boasts/name flips to easily beat back a mostly mediocre 3 rounds from Bok Da God in this one-sided battle from Grind Time.
Verdict: John John Da God (W) 2-1
Favorite line: John John Da God – “You pussy Blood, what set you claim, PMS?!?”
Recap: Pretty close 3-rounder from Grind Time with John John da Don facing off against PC in a battle that came with your usual assortment of festive (JJDD: “Top gonna crack when the rocket snap, I’ll blow his eyes from the spine, make him watch his back!”) gun bars, rugged boasts, solid punchlines and casual name flips. And while both battlers were prone for filler here and there, with the best bar of the round PC took a very close 1s, before a punch-heavier JJDD edged the 2nd round. The deciding 3rd round, even in length, was pretty mediocre on both sides with very little on the haymakers. making this one a draw.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: PC – “Don’t hype him up, get him souped like Wan Tan, I’ll pull the shotty and have him smelling like a porta potty, that’s the definition of a john, John!”
