No Bias. No Narratives.
Recap: When he wasn’t faking a choke just to see what it feels like, a more condensed and versatile Goodz scores with more than enough punches to take out a mostly laborious D.I. Da Hennyman in this one-rounder from Do Or Die Battle League.
Verdict: Goodz (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Goodz – “iPhone texting an Android, don’t even hit me if you ain’t trying to talk green!”
Recap: Offhand, I think that Soul Khan is the last noted battle rapper to actually “retire” and really mean it. Still, when you’ve been in the game as long as he has, co-own a league and get the high-priced, legend that is Loaded Lux to come battle on your platform, if you’re Arsonal why not battle him yourself, call it your sendoff and go out on a high note? Then too, with battle rap being so unorganized what with fans caring way more about the here-n-now than the past, no one will care if you battle the likes of Da Uso Hipnosis and Hollow da Don less than a year after your “retirement” match anyway.
As for the battle itself? Elongated with a boatload of filler (esp. from Lux in the latter rounds, people can stop with that ‘over the head’ bar excuses) and even with the long history these two have… underwhelming, especially when it came to the personals and what with both battlers failing to bring their A-game. That said, Kung Fu Lux, with what was easily his strongest round, edges a (“Roscoe Jenkins in here, acting like he too good for the family reunion!”) boastful 1st with more haymakers before Arsonal (who had a pretty solid 1st), tho still beleaguered by a pen that constantly spouts pedestrian bars, takes the 2nd and 3rd with a nice combo of randomly impactful disrespect bars, fiery (“I shoot with one arm out, chin down, that’s a violin tactic!”) punchlines and deep-seated personals that brought down a bit his opponent’s Vanglorious chapter in battle rap.
Verdict: Arsonal (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Arsonal – “You Under Brother Polite, new covenant, where consciousness meets commerce, well right now you at Newark Symphony Hall nigga, where your conscious can meet Converse!”
Recap: In what was a straight-up punch-fest throughout, after a debatable 1st round with Madflex, Chilla Jones spices up his punches with some fiery wordplay and killer personals/name flips in the latter rounds all the while taking advantage of a shortened 2nd round as well as a flow-challenged 3rd from his opponent to take this 3-rounder from BOTZ Battles.
Verdict: Chilla Jones (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Chilla Jones – “You wanna know why they show me love in this town brother?, ‘cuz I been fucking with the West on the low long as LeBron mother!”
Recap: Heated punches from both sides allow (“It’s like I’m a youth minister how I reach the kid, transfer into an unfit parent and beat the kid!”) Mr. Mills and (“Mills, you can rap my nigga, but not quite a boss, you take shots but got no special powers…Natasha Romanoff!”) Aye Verb to split the first two rounds here in this 3-round battle from STL Street Report. But with Verb gamely schooling his opponent on his legacy in the game as well as saving his ‘Showtime’ signature raps for the final round, after a shortened (tho he had a nice rebuttal to start it off) and a little lackluster turn from Mills, Verb gets this one clearly
Verdict: Aye Verb (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Aye Verb – “Look at me King, tiem to reach inside yourself and find the higher you, you too old to be doing this Mills, but it’s my fault bro ‘cuz I inspire you!”
Recap: For the record, anyone who’s followed 40 B.A.R.R.S battle rap career knows full well what a huge fanbase she has. And that’s all and good as she’s earned that. But just to show how ridiculous Comment sections can be, skim through almost any one of 40 battle’s that doesn’t include her Jaz battle and you’d swear that 40 has never lost a round in her life. Yeah, they’re pretty insane. That said, a personal-lit and more condensed PC manages to edge round 1 of this Bullpen battle before 40 comes through with a snapping, haymaker/wordplay-lit round 2 (i.e. classic) to even things up. 3rd round was another punch-fest, but shortened on each side. Yet, while PC made the case for writing shortened turn’s with his opening round, a dope rebuttal to start off her 3rd and a slightly punch-heavier turn by 40 anyway, helps the Boston emcee offset almost choking away her final round and gaining the win..
Verdict: 40 B.A.R.R.S. (W) 2-1
Favorite line: 40 B.A.R.R.S. – “I ain’t even come with 3 rounds, I figured I’d hit him with two by four and that would make this a bar, bitch!”
Recap: Holding it down for the opening rounds with a gang of visceral punchlines, drawn-out mayhem and sporty name flips/wordplay/set-ups, a more condensed Swamp puts in enough work to beat back a thrill-seeking, gritty and punch-lit, but also elongated D Nice in what was a competitive 3-rounder from No Ransom Battle League.
Verdict: Swamp (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Swamp – “I made all the funeral arrangements for your ass nigger, I even paid for the plot, the casket was expensive as fuck, but shit even U-haul make you pay for the box!”
Recap: Wack move by Arsonal, knocking Iron Solomon’s cap off at the end of the battle, is a bit ironic when you consider that this KOTD battle between two ‘legends’ was ‘ok’ at best what with Arsonal’s penchant for filler and uneven angles and Iron, who when he wasn’t dishing a load of subpar bars, made some pretty lame attempt’s to mimic his opponent’s ‘disrespectful’ palette. That said, in what was easily his best round, Arsonal uses a nice variety of flexing punchlines to take the 1st before Solomon dishes a load of witty/pointed personals and astute angles/punches/wordplay to even things and take the 2nd. Last round saw Arsonal deliver a load of disrespectful race lines and other real life struggle bars with his usual flair. But starting out with a fire rebuttal, Iron’s 3rd round, consistently nice with a mix of fire personals, nice self-deprecation bars and aggressive shiners were more than enough to take the round and the win.
Verdict: Iron Solomon (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Iron Solomon – “You see, Ars’s pen is average, that’s why everything you say is mean, you’re not nice!”
Recap: Honestly, in a consistently spitfire, both battlers on their A-game and super competitive battle like this one, there really are no losers. But after a slightly more versatile, gun bar swinging and (“I’m with the shit, Gotti known to keep a pistol, you dyin’ today…why you think they sent the Reaper [Reeper] with you?!”) haymaker-dropping Geechi Gotti slipped past a killer, punch-terrific turn by Glueazy to edge the 1st round, a wittier, adeptly (“Yeah, say somethin’, I’ll break somethin’, don’t bring your freak around me, or I’ll pistol whip her, yeah, crack her in the head like she thinkin’ ’bout me!”) braggadocios and (“Go ‘head, call up jake if y’all racist, but don’t sleep around white boys, we draw on faces!”) set-up/scheme-heavy Glu beats a solid, street-savvy Gotti to even things out. As to be expected, the deciding 3rd round was close with Glueazy continuing to spaz with a nice mix of lucid personals and more (“Chest shot, five will have him walkin’ like Red Foxx!”) salacious mayhem. But by taking on a (“You know how many nigga hit they mama’s phone like, ‘I’m on my way home’, but never made it?”) grimmer and darker tone with his bars to enhance that real street shit he’s become so noted for, Geechi Gotti’s unique ability to paint such an indelible atmosphere throughout his turn gives him the final round and the win here.
Verdict: Geechi Gotti (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Geechi Gotti – “What the hell wrong with all these white boys thinkin’ they can rap?, see, I gotta blame Marshall, the flame spark you, mini .40, get a small cap in the middle of ya dome like Hey Arnold!“
Recap: Daylyt and Bangz, two of battle rap’s best entertainers/rhyme schemers, go at it on the WeGoHard stage. And for two-and-a-half rounds it’s a spitfire show with Daylyt’s frenzied punches, witty performance lines and stinging (“He getting whipped, told you, you ain’t ready for the repo!”; “If I spot your top it’ll be wig stains, peep the start of the universe, I come with something Big Bang [Bangz]!”) wordplay going toe-to-toe with Bangz offhanded freestyles, spiffy rebuttals and roundhouse (“Nigga, the last time we seen a cold Light [Lyt] is when we opened up the fridge!”) haymakers. Debatable going into the final round, Daylyt’s want for struggle bars gets lethargic before he finds himself quitting a little early. However, it’s a different ballgame for Bangz, who turns up with a blazing turn of potent punchlines and exquisite (“Assault one, this nigga really got me aggravated…’cuz as soon as he walk through the door, I got two arms out like ‘I’m glad you made it!'”) set-ups to grab the win.
Verdict: Bangz (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Bangz – “Nigga, this shot for you, no debate, you’ll fold and break, then put my foot so far up this nigga ass, the devil will not know which sole [soul] to take!”
Recap: When you admittedly refer to a battle as meaning ‘nuthin’ to you, you might not be as motivated to write your best bars. That seems to be the case here as Ty Law’s notorious punches are frequented by too many listless dyke jokes and ‘over-ya-head’ bars that bordered on reaching when he wasn’t scoring with definitive (“Chrome bitch spitting, I shoot till it’s hot as hell fire, give it to Q to cool in the mouth like a nail-biter!”) shiners here and there. On the other hand the always confident QB, seemingly (“He a faggot, his real name by law [bi Law], they can’t charge me with a crime, and that’s by Law!”) punching a little more these days than flexing with the personals, ably stood her ground in a one-round bout that on paper anyway, looked to be more competitive.
Verdict: QB (Black Diamond) (W) 1-0
Favorite line: QB (Black Diamond) – “That’s why real nigger’s don’t fuck with you and my presence got you feeling uncomfortable, I bust pistols, crazier than a Spanish bitch with trust issues!”
Recap: In this Spanish-tinged PG matchup, Profit’s performance and unorthodox stylings may prove to be noteworthy in the long run, but heads shouldn’t sleep on the spiffy bars and effort from Ralphy Gabbana either. Indeed, with Gabbana displaying more consistency and (“URL gonna monetize the views, but either way my hands is on Profit!”) potency with his punches/schemes in the 1st round, the DMV rapper was able to take the lead, before a more enriched-with-the-bars Profit came back to edge the 2nd. In the deciding 3rd, Gabbana, despite reaching a little bit with the name flips, makes for a solid enough turn to match what was also a solid and versatile turn from Profit, who might’ve edged the round and won the battle if he had come cleaner.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Profit – “Plus I heard your bitch can’t cook, you should make her disappear, her rice and beans is trash, I’m chasing it, it’s weird!”
Recap: Dope, competitive KOTD battle between Bigg K and Pat Stay ironically comes down to K, a battler rarely known for rapping longer than his opponent, getting edged in the 3rd round for doing just that. Indeed, while K’s punchline/wordplay game was rousing at times and his personals often hit with amusing narratives, rapping almost twice as longer as Pat in the 1st round with lesser overall bar efficiency would hurt him there and one too many redundant heaters and as well as some surprising shots at KOTD (tho they were mean) would cost him in the deciding 3rd. For the performance-heavy Pat Stay, who for the most part impressed throughout the battle with stinging breakdowns of Bigg K’s style of rap, a couple of spicy rebuttals (as well as a spitfire, mid-round rebut in the 1st), witty anecdotes/punches and a host of boastful barbs, an ability to dish 3 condensed turn against an opponent who’s long noted for doing the same, would end up in his favor.
Verdict: Pat Stay (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Pat Stay – “[Bigg K kicks imaginary garbage after a line from Pat] You okay there, bro?, what are you, a fucking angry baseball coach?, well, I got that Slugger for next time you interrupt me, and I’ll let that Louie see K if this ginger thinks he’s funny!”
Recap: It’s a literal punch-fest in this dope 3-round battle between (“The type to rock socks and sandals outside when the snow’s deep, that’s why you ducked me in Chicago, you really had cold feet!”) E. Farrell and the vet (“Never go personal, I just kill nigger’s, I’m a kill you and you die…we got a deal nigger!”) B. Magic. With both hitting their marks more often then not, it’s a slightly more consistently strong, less predictable and more flow-efficient B. Magic that ends up winning it by handily taking rounds 1 and 3.
Verdict: B. Magic (W) 2-1
Favorite line: B. Magic – “Suicide, kill yourself, do or die, see these, a buck on the corner like the movie guy!”
Recap: Impressive, mayhem-dishing and boastful-ringing showing by J. Murda gets edged by an even more consistent, wordplay-spazzing, punchline-crazy and raucous turn by J-Krooger in what was a pretty competitive and fiery 1-round battle from Step Your Ink Game Up.
Verdict: J-Krooger (W) 1-0
Favorite line: J-Krooger – “A squad of killers, so if he raise a finger I need not to, Dre and Floss done Nike checked you, I’m just coming to re-box [Reebok] you!”
Recap: More a battle with a host of showmanship, rigid gun lines and “moments” (R. Streetz dropping the water bottle by Mack Mel to accentuate his ‘distracting’ 2nd round gun bar, being the best one) rather than a clean and fiery barfest, a surprising choke by Mel in the 2nd prevents this battle from being a classic. However, the PG battle’s competitive nature, sterling punches on both sides, a debatable 1st round and Mel coming back in the 3rd with a (“But I seen you came here in a new J’s, UCLA, nice chain, Norbes, I see you like the nice things, [swish!!!] buck-50 aside, I gave Streetz a bike lane!”) too-fiery turn that easily beat back a pretty standard round from Streetz, while normally making this one a draw, instead, thanks to the choke, gives it to R. Streetz.
Verdict: R. Streetz (W) 2-1
Favorite line: R. Streetz – “.22 in the boot, done rubbed on my Achilles so much, the skin don’t grow there!”
Recap: Doesn’t matter how much gwap they got, two legends you’ve never battled before, like Hollow da Don and Dizaster, shouldn’t be doing one-round promo battles. And then to make matters worse, after he goes first with a sterling and uninterrupted 5-minute round, Hollow starts openly gesturing and complaining about Dizaster going past past his allotted time limit. But if you’re confident enough in your bars (esp. after hearing most of your opponent’s already), why spoil a good matchup by whining and even leaving the stage because your ego can’t handle the possibility of Dizaster upstaging you with a longer round? Granted, KOTD could’ve done a better job with keeping track of the time. But Hollow’s been in this game too long to be putting his ego before the fans. All that said, when it comes to the battle, killer lines (and dope rebuttals) aplenty by both dudes certainly enlightened the crowd and did enough to warrant a 3-round battle in the near future. But da Don’s over-the-top versatility and Diz’s penchant for filler (esp. at the start of his turn) ends up giving Hollow the win…despite his antics at the end.
Verdict: Hollow da Don (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Hollow da Don – “Sike I lied, nigga I got bars, I’m mad charming, make him feel at home with a desert [dessert] that’ll sand storm him!”
Verdict: Eazy The Block Captain (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Eazy The Block Captain – “Nigga, you ever been through it?, theer was times when I was dead pop, I mean ya man shot, bullets glaze, leg shot, don’t gotta put no tattoo on my face to remember the body ‘cuz a real nigga already left the tear drops!”
Recap: A ‘Napolean Dynamite’ reference highlights a versatile performance here by Skates, who versus a solid and (“The .4 will straighten him up, y’all better get Skates in line!”) gun-centric Bars the Animal, uses a plethora of bully bars, lofty (“When this .22 feel like a .9, what’s wind chill factor?”) gun lines, fire set-ups, fiery punchlines and even some rare wit to outshine his opponent for 3 rounds and take what, despite the final score, was still a pretty competitive battle.
Verdict: Skates (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Skates – “It don’t matter of it’s 30 years later, you’ll still get got nigga, ‘cuz I’ll give my own son the contract, I’m Doc Rivers!”
Recap: Jerry Wess’ rambunctious name flips and fiery gun bars prove to be too much for a slip-up prone Milk Da General.
Verdict: Jerry Wess (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Jerry Wess – “They call you Da Gneeral, get hit with the Bill Russell, that’s plenty rings, these bullets will go in General…like this could be about anything!”
Recap: After dishing a pretty pedestrian 1st round that easily got beat back by a fire, OG-savvy turn by Moon, Diesel steps it up with steady aggression, backed by fiery name flips, some nice schemes and roundhouse punchlines to take rounds 2 and 3 for the win over a still solid, but not as potent opponent in this PG match from Smack/URL.
Verdict: Diesel (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Diesel – “I’ll have Moon staring at the .50 like his birthday coming!”
Recap: Dishing stinging name flips, righteous schemes and hard-hitting personals in rounds 1 and 3 with extra flair and confidence, Charlies Clips easily sets back an erratic Danja Zone in this 3-rounder from Black Ice Cartel.
Verdict: Charlie Clips (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Charlie Clips – “…and this nigga a snitch, running with State Farm, what that mean he pop up with the wrong Jake!”
Recap: Who doesn’t love an aggressive, hard-fought fight? That’s what happens here with Times and Dre Dennis on the KOTD stage, what with both spitting hardbody lines, frenetic gun bars and in the case of mostly Dennis, spirited name flips. That said, a couple of too-close-to-call rounds leaves this one decided in the first, where a more potent, wordplay-heavy and consistent with the mayhem, Dre Dennis won pretty handily.
Verdict: Dre Dennis (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Dre Dennis – “You try to jump me ‘cuz my goons ain’t with me?, nigga the tool ain’t friendly, I’ll be squeezing from the back like the toothpaste empty!”
Recap: A fire one-rounder between Bedaffi Green and Lexx Luthor has them both flexing their mettle. With Luthor spitting jovial personals along with a plethora of witty and hefty (“You wanna use science, fair, after your battle with Glu, stick to the projects!”) one-liners and Green, at his boastful (“Fuck a penny for your thoughts [click, click] you’ll get a nickel for your action!”) best, dishing multi-faceted shiners with steady aggression. Yet, as hard as it is to knock anything here, it’s Green, with slightly more consistent heaters and less dry spots, that earns the win here.
Verdict: Bedaffi Green (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Bedaffi Green – “I’m ready to make a movie the moment you act foolish, casting for it, retarded clip, nigga I want you to act stupid!”
Recap: Witty anecdotes, storytelling raps and stinging (“If I Smack you, everybody gonna know [no] me and I never bought tickets to N.O.M.E.!”) wordplay from Floss Da Boss. Aggressive gun (“Fuck that [Bang!!!], I’ll let it kick off wherever you feel welcome at, ‘cuz I’m right at home!”) lines and rich (“It’s the same old church song, I’m done with him [hymn]!”) set-ups from J. Murda (who’s flow was consistently nice, despite all flags for unsportsmanlike conduct throughout the battle). Altogether make for a close, competitive battle on the RBE stage. However, it’s the personals, especially when it came to mocking his opponent’s (“Hey Murda, you been screaming ‘Fuck the World’ forever, what did it do?”) repertoire, that gives Floss the deciding round 3 and a win.
Verdict: Floss Da Boss (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Floss Da Boss -“Nigga, I dare you come to my crib, I’ll show you I ain’t the one to creep on, I’ll be sitting there with the arm in the chair like I’m holding somebody seat for ’em!”
Recap: Here we find a couple of old Grind Time vets, Young Kannon and Money Bagz, finally meeting up to go at it on the URL/Smack stage. 1st round is the only decisive round with YK’s usual emotive assortment of killer (“Make a Stone Cold entrance, yunno, the glass break when a bald head rush through the door?, I’m dancing with the sweeper, that’s Turbo in front of the store!”) punches and fierce wordplay easily beating back a staid turn from Money Bagz that featured way too many outdated bars. The middle round saw things get more competitive as Bagz lifted up his energy and delivered with some rich (“Oh, you got a gun up on your waist?, well that’s how you get your dome split, reverse psychology, I’ll take it from you and hit you with your own shit!”) set-ups and aggressive punchlines. However, coming off resoundingly consistent throughout this battle, YK hits right back with a potent mix of witty (“Your girl pussy taste like Starburst…the PINK one!”) bars, heated haymakers and piercing (“Do him dirty, then leave clean, that’s how I’m laundering Money!”) name flips. Behind 0-2 going into the final round, Money Bagz hangs in there with arguably his best (“How you in the field, but left your Shield like Roman Reigns?”) lines. However, a couple of slip-ups resort in the Team Homi member choking at the end, thus giving the round away to what was a pretty standard turn by YK.
Verdict: Young Kannon (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Young Kannon – “Catch him rolling up in his vehicle, throw 10 in a car, have half the body hanging out the whip like Kendrick Lamar!”
Recap: The activist bars of Oops versus the God-complex rituals and acute wordplay of Xcel makes for a fierce and close battle on the KOTD stage. A match that was almost a debatable, if not for the Oops struggling with his flow a few times during the decisive 3rd round after taking tying things up with a magnificent 2nd round after Xcel edged the 1st. Granted, this is the best (“I remember needing capital for an office, now my office is in a capital!”) Oops we’ve seen in awhile, but the decision here is a slightly more consistnet Xcel by a nose at the end.
Verdict: Xcel (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Xcel – “I was never rushing [Russian] to be in the stars, I ain’t a cosmonaut, I’m a rapper than been in the field since Rock ‘N Jock!”
Recap: Hey rules are rules, so seeing a veteran like Mr. Mills in a PG might be suspect to some, but he still made the most of it. Indeed, displaying consistent focus with steely raps and sanguine punches that kept in this matchup versus a rapid R Streetz. An equal amount of bullish raps makes for a debatable first round, before Streetz edges a fire-on-both-sides 2nd with a slightly more consistent flow, better performance and one more (“I load the clip like easy on the salt, a couple of tips for Mills [meals]!”) a haymaker. However, going into the 3rd behind by a round, Mills continues to score with some stifling (“Don’t look now but the ratchet got your back, that’s loyalty!”) punches and dope punchlines/personals that increase his chances of getting a tie…except when almost halfway through his round, out of nowhere R Streetz chokes. Unfortunately, the ultimate screw-up doesn’t just make for a loss of the round, but with a technical added to the foul, the battle as well.
Verdict: Mr Mills (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Mr Mills – “But in this telegraph, I figured I’d use murder to start the letter off, so when I put the nina to whom it may concern, think [points at R Streetz] ‘To Whom It May Concern’ when I start the letter off!”
Recap: Sporting a plethora of fire punchlines from each battler throughout, Born and Nunn Nunn go tit-for-tat on the KOTD stage. That’s a harbinger for a close and competitive battle, that with some ample accessories (i.e. Nunn Nunn kicking a couple of dope rebuttals to edge the 2nd round after a solid freestyle garners a debatable first) and Born’s ability to still dispense a barrage of spitfire (“I was sleeping, but still coming [cumming] for a bitch like a wet dream!”) punchlines in the final 3rd round to beat back Nunn Nunn’s more pedestrian turn, makes for a draw at the end.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Nunn Nunn – “If I’m a white bitch, then Nuborn [new born] I’m Casey Anthony!”
Verdict: Dre Dennis (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Dre Dennis – “Shot his bitch twice with the toast that I’m squeezing, spell it out ‘Boom, two O’s in ya BM!”
Recap: Maybe if RI 28Grams had stuck to what he seems to do best at: rich jokes/personals, he would’ve foregone the mostly pedestrian bars and stood a chance against the indistinguishable heat from Dre Dennis in this 3-round battle from Trap NY.
Verdict: Dre Dennis (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Dre Dennis -“I’m in a zone, I’m right with the chrome, the .9 to ya dome…oh yeah I’m treating Grams worse than retirement homes!”
Recap: A gang of scurrilous allegations on her personal life by Tetsho Vintage doesn’t stop a punchline-heavy, witty/nasty at times and mayhem-dishing Yoshi G (who also had a dope, mid-turn rebuttal during the 2nd round) from taking the first couple of rounds for the win in this 3-rounder from ABR.
Verdict: Yoshi G (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Yoshi G – “I had to convince my sister you wasn’t a stud, nigger!”
Recap: Offering up a barrage of doo-rag jokes along with plenty of freestyles and some able rebuttals, the ever-witty and wordplay-heavy Bangz pushes back the aggressive, but inconsstent stylings of Bubba Forde.
Verdict: Bangz (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Bangz – “I don’t know what the fuck is worse, the way your cape hang all day or the fact that you graduated with your do-rag on, with your dumb ass!”
Recap: Jai 400 Block impresses once again on the URL/Smack stage. This time using eerie name flips, flexing (“You a Jakkboy Maine [jack boy, man], well I’m a Ryda [rider] at the right time!”) wordplay and some elite guns bars to take out a (“I’m looking for him in his grandmom crib, screaming ‘You bastard, you soft!’, I let it ring in the house, now his granny dead in the living room, the plastic went off, [blows finger like gun] I left a stain in the house!”) hard-hitting at times, but overall flow-challenged Dougy on this Ascension card.
Verdict: Jai 400 Block (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Jai 400 Block – “Ace Ventura, have them animals raiding your house, got him tripping like Ray Finkle, guess the laces was out!”
Recap: If there’s one minor critique against Real Deal, it might be that he’s too smart for his own good. The Pittsburgh rapper sometimes getting a little too aberrant with his cultural references and similes in a battle rap world where while non-conformists are accepted, self-identity is not often varying. That said, here against West-coast battler Afta, after losing round 1 to his swift-rapping, witty and heavier-punching opponent, the ever reliable Deal ups his wordplay, personal vigor, wit and bar efficiency to edge both of the latter round for the win in this 3-rounder from PnR Battles.
Verdict: Real Deal (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Real Deal – “I talk different like when little kids pretend to be Beavis!”
Recap: From iBattleTV, after deadlocking with Chris Mills in round 1, Kyd Slade’s blistering trap talk, gritty storytelling, ill street bars and crispy punchlines offers up a sturdier turn in rounds 2 and 3 to give the CT up-n-comer the win over a competitive and oft-punch/wordplay solid, but not as efficient Mills.
Verdict: Kyd Slade (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Kyd Slade – “My little nigga had an old ass Mac for sale, was kind of rusty but I had to get it, like that’s your bitch?, I’ll place the hit and put a bag on her head like she was ugly but I had to hit it!”
Recap: Considering his growing popularity, Nu Jerzey Twork’s struggles with remembering his bars may get the headlines here, but a versatile showing from Mike P, what with dope (“You barely popping and that’s because you lazy Twork [twerk]!”) punchlines, bombastic schemes, witty personals, consistent showmanship and some finessed wordplay deserves all the praises, doing enough too with a cleaner flow to take rounds 1 and 3 (in which Twork cut short due to nearly choking) over an NJT who while edging the middle round with more (“I was on Chuck E. Cheese and I was a little nigga when that was open and I say that to say I never rat, the only thing I got from a rat was a bag of tokens!”) potent bars and some dizzying haymakers, needs to work on his preparation more if he wants to keep standing in with the big dogs.
Verdict: Mike P (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Mike P -“Blade weapon, you’re privileged to get it, it’s like your birth right, put a butterfly into your cocoon, i could reverse life!”
Recap: Dope 3-rounder from RBE between Swave Sevah and Heavy Half with the less experienced Heavy displaying a wide load of greasy gun bars, rugged street shit and some gripping storytelling with a spicy mix of piercing punchlines dipped in. Good thing for Swave he was all the ready for whatever his opponent brought him, the Harlem vet sporting a more versatile mix of witty personals, flexing boss talk, stinging punches/wordplay and wily name flips to edge the 1st and 3rd rounds for the win.
Verdict: Swave Sevah (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Swave Sevah – “I’m nice, hate it or love it I rap my way, name your price and I’ll slash in Half like it’s Black Friday!”
Recap: Two of Southern battle rap’s finest, Ness Lee and Chef Trez, get together on ABR for a competitive 3-rounder that except for Lee’s mostly futile attenpt to match Chef’s rebuttal/freestyle game, stayed close with a gang of hardbody punchlines/name flips, witty barbs, gritty personals, dialed-up machismo fiery gun bars and stifling wordplay from both battlers. Still, helped by the aforementioned off-the-dome theatrics and a little more subdued 3rd round by his opponent, it’s a more punch-lit Trez who takes the deciding final round for the win.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “I hope you brought your best shit and some of the craziest Chef flips, but most of the shit you put on display plate been seen before…word to Netflix!”
Recap: An aggressive (on both sides), tight and competitive Proving Grounds match between Mack Mel and Quban comes down to the 3rd round, where after a solid turn by Quban, a slightly more versatile and performance-driven Mel literally hoists a couple of righteous shots/personals at Cuban and his entourage that not only gets the crowd hyped, but prove to be the difference-maker.
Verdict: Mack Mel (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Mack Mel – “The ruger shoot, you Crip and you Crip right?, well [points hand like a gun] this can will turn C&C to Juicy Juice!”
Recap: In a battle that was 15 to 20 minutes longer than it should’ve been and was suddenly interrupted by Tink Da Demon literally throwing up backstage midway through his round 1, a mercurial Th3 Saga uses a boatload of God-fearing raps, stealth punchlines/wordplay and some shiny haymakers to beat back an opponent fanatically rich on diabolic behavior and witty barbs, but mostly underwhelming on angles that hit on Th3 Saga’s spirituality. For Th3 Saga, oft-elongated and unnecessarily combative at times with a crowd that went ham on his more eminent raps, coming off a raucous Chess battle that saw him stay competitive but humbly lose, a 3-0 here makes for the perfect bounce back.
Verdict: Th3 Saga (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Th3 Saga – “I get the call in, bodies disappear, I’m trying to leave the Matrix!”
Recap: Drawing out the mayhem like he enjoys the kill, in this pretty solid 1-rounder from Body Bag Battle League, a loudly visceral Tink Tha Demon serves up a slicing of consistent and utter pandemonium on Kid Chaos to take it in the end. The rapid flowing, sound-effects slinging and at times punch-heavy Chaos put on a quality and competitive show overall, but besides his opponent’s comeuppance, he was also hurt by one too many predictable fat jokes and some pedestrian bars here and there.
Verdict: Tink Da Demon (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Tink Da Demon – “You know what happened to a nigger that get hit with a ghost pellet?, full body Tourette’s to let you know that the ghost felt it!”
Recap: If there’s one chink in T Top’s armor (and the same goes for his bro Brizz Rawsteen) it’s that too often he just raps too long, thus diluting rounds with unnecessary bars that while more often not still lean on being fire, don’t quite meet the standard of haymakers and in turn risk lowering his ratio of haymakers per round. But surprisingly, here against the always stylish, talkish and confident Goodz, besides a substantive time differential between the two battlers in round 1, in the latter two rounds, they spit for around the same amount of time. That said, with a more condensed and shit-talking Goodz edging the 1st round before a boisterous, punch-spazzing and (“Dog, I would’ve battled Yung Ill twice on the corner and then sold him what he needed, got him right on the corner!”) personal-heavy Top drops just enough more haymakers to take round 2 and tie things up. With the match on the line in the 3rd, T Top’s elongated turn still makes for a solid effort with a gang of spicy name flips, personals and punchlines. However, Top’s final round proves to be no sweat off the back for Goodz, who with the reliable cup of Henny in hand, unloads an extra witty, (“You sound like Jadakiss with cancer!”) personal-themed, punch-heavy and swagger-licious turn to beat back any chance of his opponent taking the bout.
Verdict: Goodz (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Goodz – “You ready T?, ‘cuz we don’t talk much, if it’s personal we park the car and do walk-ups!”
Recap: Surely, in lieu of his notorious ‘choke rep’, one could understand the thought of Tone Montana shortening his rounds so much here versus Snake Eyez in order to lessen the risk of choking. But other than a solid and gritty 1st round that while he still lost, displayed some competition, Montana’s condensed turns in the 2nd and 3rd, mixed with few fire punchlines here and there, but also questionable angles and random personals, stood zero chance against a Snake Eyez who consistently came hard throughout his 3 rounds with fierce struggle bars, fiery punches, heated gun bars and potent schemes. But hey, for what it’s worth, at least Tone gave you 3 straight rounds.
Verdict: Snake Eyez (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Snake Eyez – “100 in a drum, trying to leave 50 of ’em in you, and leave your body with a smell like Gwitty in the venue!”
Recap: Rambunctious with the grimy set-ups, segueing nicely between punches and fanatical with the gritty flow, Gwitty easily earns his paper with a dominating, one-round performance over a sputtering and eventually choking Rad B.
Verdict: Gwitty (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Gwitty – “He the type to snitch, call the cops after work, caught him nice and jewelry, he got picked on the cover, like the Madden curse!”
Recap: From Michigan’s BBG Battles, M. Ciddy’s astute wordplay, shrewd personals and piercing punchlines, enhanced by persistent aggression with nary a dry spot, creates enough havoc to beat back a pretty solid and name flip/punch-heavy at times, but not always hitting (and a bit delivery-challenged) effort from Bonnie Godiva.
Verdict: M. Ciddy (W) 3-0
Favorite line: M. Ciddy – “How is you Godiva?, you don’t manufacture your own bars!”
Recap: Old school and the new generation intertwine for a fire battle between Chess and Tay Roc on the URL/Smack stage. And here we see the two battlers give the fan’s their money’s worth starting with an aggressive Chess spitting a lyrically mammoth 1st round (i.e. classic) that shined throughout with its consistent bent for over-the-top punch (“This nigga’s pussy and he’s a frail ho, talking like he’s gonna creep up with his heater, hell no, we ain’t seen Roc put an arm on Chess [chest] since the People’s Elbow!”) acumen, grittiness and stinging wordplay, before Roc (who himself had a pretty solid 1st round) would come right back, after losing the opening round, with a sometimes witty, but brazen with the personals, (“You can’t handle that old Roc that was a teenager, I’ll put ya face in front of a MAC, that’s a screensaver!”) punchline-savvy and gun bar heavy 2nd round to beat a solid but not as potent turn by Chess and make it a draw going into the 3rd. The last round would feature yet another hard-bodied, mayhem-drenched, street endorsed, sometimes personal, braggadocios and rigid turn by both battlers. But with an equal amount of haymakers on both sides along with Roc dishing a more condensed turn with less dry spots, the edge here goes to the B-more vet.
Verdict: Tay Roc (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Tay Roc – “My block? you would never dare pass, .38 and it hold dum dums, this a special ed class, aye they ain’t tell you my style type gutter?, give you a buck 50, now you and Steams can smile like brothers!”
Recap: Solid battle between a sporadically (“You done ‘fo, [blhhlhhlt] give him a drum roll, first round, I’m a split up Ten, it’s 1-0!”) potent Nunn Nuun and an aggressively (“Ayo Nunn Nunn, I don’t rock with you, because nigga you rep wrong, ain’t you get killed by Ave?, so why would I fuck with White that’s already been stepped on?”) nice at times Top Ten, sees them split the first two rounds before Nunn Nuun outshines his opponent in the decisive 3rd with more steady heat along with less predictable themes.
Verdict: Nunn Nunn (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Nunn Nunn – “These bucks will send him to God like collection plates, I’ll bring that shit to ya yard like septic tanks!”
Recap: A few scattered shiners for YaBoyClip, but an inconsistent round filled with some lazy punches/set-ups stood little chance against Ru Bando’s delicious gun lines, witty barbs and repeatedly heated punchlines.
Verdict: Ru Bando (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Ru Bando – “He in the window?, that’s cool, now the beam pop, I’ll lock on his home…then I squeeze, he’ll get a screenshot!”
Recap: One would think a vet like QP wouldn’t be feening for crowd reaction as much as he does here throughout this RBE battle against 40 B.A.R.R.S. Of course, it could be that he’s just not used to battling in front of the laidback RBE crowd or he just doesn’t trust that, despite his notorious troubles off the stage, he still has one of the best pen’s in the dame (something you can tell even 40 acknowledged plenty of times during this battle). And yeah, Quantum was pretty nice here, dishing fierce schemes, witty barbs and loads of spicy linguistics with sometimes rapid abandon, that is when he wasn’t letting Qleen Paper tag-in to drop a couple of gritty haymakers in round 3. But when it comes to the pen, we all know 40’s no slouch either and the Boston spitter proved that once again via a gang of spicy wordplay mixed in with slick personals and righteous schemes with enough bite to edge rounds 1 and 3 for the win.
Verdict: 40 B.A.R.R.S. (W) 2-1
Favorite line: 40 B.A.R.R.S. – “Niggas seen me lose to Jaz and they was mad, but they ain’t see my stock drop, ‘cuz 40 still cooking on the low for a minute like crock pot!”
Recap: A strong 3 rounds laced with nice (“I told him from the gate, I’ll do a number on him like a Holocaust tat!”) punches/angles and witty (“You worried about the next opponent, the next card, trying to create some views, homie, this custody battle is the real deal and it’s judged, you’re right, maybe I’ll pray for you!”) personals from Real Deal gets taken out by a stronger two rounds from Reepah Rell, who even without the face paint, displays (before slipping up immensely in the 3rd) a versatile barfest that featured fiery name flips, crazy (“There’s a reason I ain’t wear the paint, y’all thinking Deal could change the game, cool, I brought the poker face!”) wordplay, potent old head bars and seismic (“See, I ain’t gonna knock you for being a teacher, honestly that’s big for you, but now it’s teacher lounge, I brought the cig for you!”) punchlines to hold on for the win.
Verdict: Reepah Rell (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Reepah Rell – “You not fucking with my gunplay, ways of dying?, here’s one way, I toss a round in his cap…you playing music on the subway!”
Recap: Competitive 1-round West-coast Elites battle between Coffee Brown and King Malcolm Jamal sees the two trade a boatload of nifty punchlines, when not spouting rigid name flips and other sport/braggadocios bars. But thanks in part to a slwo start by her opponent, but mostly due to her own ability to dish fire personals and a couple of nice rebuttals mixed in, it’s Coffee who edges this one.
Verdict: Coffee Brown (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Coffee Brown – “I will blow on this nigga, where your body gonna be the riddle, I’ll bury you 3 feet deep, that’s now I put Malcolm in the Middle!”
Recap: Brizz Rawsteen takes a break from the big stage to literally school up-n-comer Gritzzz on the experience and form required to become a professional battle rapper. And after conducting a stifling lesson on delivery, performance, haymakers, stage presence and jaunty name flips, Brizz approves the yung’uns mostly meager effort, before departing the stage with yet another easy vic.
Verdict: Brizz Rawsteen (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Brizz Rawsteen – “We get off the chain with bro, all you seen was nigga’s killing everything in the house…it’s a slave revolt!”
Recap: The always aggressive and gritty with the urban (“Nigga, I got two guns [puts out each hand on the sides of Kannon], if I shoot, it’ll death on both ya sides like gang violence!”) grumblings Big Hann manages to pull off a mild upset as the usually on-point Big Kannon waits till the middle of the second round to get his A-game going (that’s proven even moreso by a [“But respect is what I better see from dude, if not I’m a see his group, I’ll make them all leak blood on the ground, and the leader, I’ll leak a leader too, but people, just know that the eagle, I’m ready to let the eagle loose…but I’ll open up Hann [hand] right in front of ya eyes, nigga ‘PEEK_A_BOO!’“] superlative 3rd by Kannon). But by then the more overall consistent Big Hann had already edged the match with a thunderous opening round that easily beat a feeble 1st from his opponent, while edging the middle round with more fiery bars.
Verdict: Big Hann (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Big Hann – “I pack tools, the snub, you’ll get a wide nose in ya face like Papoose!”
Recap: Punchline feen versus puncher sees a more rapidly consistent and a little more versatile K-Shine take this spirited one-rounder from an up-n-down and a bit filler-prone Ty Law.
Verdict: K-Shine (W) 1-0
Favorite line: K-Shine – “With the .40 I’m like a proud new dad…ready to Pop!”
Recap: In this 3-round matchup from Trap NY, it’s a showcase of typical insular, braggadocio, anti-social gun bars spouted by both (“Like when you’re done watching porn online…Qleen [clean] your history!”) Dre Dennis and (“When I get the chrome, he Chilla Jones, all that scheming for nothing!”) Qleen Paper that keeps the drama interesting throughout the battle. However, after a more condensed and spitfire QP edges the 2nd round (after a debatable first) to take the lead going into the final round, his penchant for Earl visitations along a very resilient Dennis, combines for a draw at the end.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Dre Dennis – “Your stock drop because you take gwap and you darting, dropping tiers because you fake son like ‘Sorry I lied to you Martin!’“
Recap: In between struggling with his flow at times, former Proving Grounds denizen Haixian displays a bit of the (“You know the type of shit that you in stupid?, I got a dog [points hand like a gun]…but when you inside my yard, the fence [defense] useless!”) talent that warranted him getting a PG. But after Haixian pretty much choked away his shot an upset over DNA, the Queens, NYC emcee goes ham, dispensing fiery gun bars, wicked (“Y’all named this event ‘All Eyes On Me’?, well I could relate to that, ‘cuz after taking out Law’s crew, we getting Haixian [Haitian] jacked!”) punchlines and righteous name flips with relentless abandon to easily take this one-rounder from Do Or Die Battle League.
Verdict: DNA (W) 1-0
Favorite line: DNA – “Y’all all got to see what I did to Danja, his streak couldn’t make it last, I mean I hate to brag, but didn’t you just see your partner cooked in a suit?, that’s Breaking Bad!”
Recap: Mixing up fiery street (“I was taught better, I’m old-school, the cloth leather!”) themes with sporadic drug talk, erstwhile sports bars and some dry wit that won the crowd over while flexing his versatility, Dougy earns a win over a pretty (“I don’t wanna hear that you on SMACK, that’s irrelevant, fuck I look like being on Smack, I like selling it!”) solid throughout, but mostly one-themed Pakistan in this 3-rounder from CGBL.
Verdict: Dougy (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Dougy – “Since a yung’un I been playing with guns, I just like when it spark, put nigga’s on the floor when I draw…I was nice with the chalk!”
Recap: When it ends up thisclose, the slightest mistake can cost you a battle. Such is the case here as an aggressively punch and extremely witty Shotti P takes the first round before just getting edged to a more versatile and aggressively potent Swave Sevah in round 2. Split going into the 3rd, both battlers keep it competitive with solid turns that were sparked by feelgood braggadocio bars and some dope punchlines. However, thanks to a Shotti P slip-up towards the end of his round, it’s a more steady with the flow Swave who manages to hold on and eke this one out.
Verdict: Swave Sevah (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Swave Sevah – “And yeah, I’m a Black belt, but people don’t fight with their fists now, so get down, when this Grandmaster flash…nigger get down!”
Recap: This 1-rounder from DfwBattleLeague sees Krucial Ken use fire punchlines, a few fiery personals and frequent gun-speak to out-punch a competitive, but too hot-n-cold Prestige.
Verdict: Krucial Ken (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Krucial Ken – “These bitches get to popping out of nowhere…fake friend request!”
