Over 4,000 Recaps!

Mister Greco

Battle rap enthusiast living in Timbuktu

Tay Roc defeats Brizz Rawsteen

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Recap: It’s just too much Roc in this one, as despite Brizz Rawsteen bringing his entire arsenal of deft performance bars, (“Two hands on a .9, that’s real nigga time!”) loud/aggressive and hitting punchlines, pronounced delivery and witty polemics/personals to the match, Tay Roc’s steady ability to floss with rich gun lines, spitfire punchlines, kindred vet (“Nigga’s always talking about what they woulda did, till they the one’s that it happen to you!”) speak, fiery wordplay, ‘random’ (“I said, Summer Madness coming, Calicoe, stop running, Conceited, how you 4-foot 5 and still ducking?, John John still talking shit, he gonna make me steal something…”) shiners and braggadocio haymakers (all of which particularity shined and got him rounds 1 & 2, before a debatable 3rd) prove to be too much for the Dark Side up-n-comer, who while getting better as the battle proceeded, not only had too many dry spots, for the most part just couldn’t match his opponent’s consistency and versatility.

Verdict: Tay Roc (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Tay Roc – “Hey, to all them nigga’s claiming Gun Bar King, them nigga’s not me, I used to carry 1, now I pair it [parrot], they trying to mock me!”

Big T defeats Dizaster

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Recap: Gotta admit  throughout his 3 rounds Dizaster killed (“I’d give this guy a hundred bucks just to see him try to double-dutch”; “You being overweight is starting to fuck with your ability to be a G cousin…you’re limited to drive-bys only!”) with the jokes and personals here against Big T–however, that one angle of comedy amounted to like 75% of his lines. On the other hand, after struggling a bit with his delivery in round 1, Big T got his groove back in the latter rounds, using a steady mix of nasty personals, crowd-pleasing punchlines, amiable (“This steel can get out of hand like a Logan sequel”) wordplay and fleeting (“I’m like damn Diz, y’all already controlling the gas”) jokes to come from behind and take the win.

Verdict: Big T (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Big T – “Fuck fairness, nigga I’m coming to kill your parents, off Terrence, I’ll grab a butcher knife, tear it, rib in your chest, Breast Cancer Awareness!”

Hitman Holla defeats Math Hoffa

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Recap: “It’s 8 o’clock”. Smh. With all the unprofessional interruptions, bad mics and b/w footage, I guess there are plenty of good reasons why King Juce Battle League got out of the battle rap business pretty quickly. Small battle league problems aside, Hitman Holla and Math Hoffa still put on a pretty good show with plenty of witty barbs, fiery personals, showmanship (esp. on Hitman’s part, what with the ‘gun ), some hot punchlines, fierce braggadocio lines and even a couple of nice rebuttals (esp. Math’s shot at ‘Big Gerald’ in the final round). Tied going into the 3rd, the edge here goes to Hitman, but not so much for what he did do in what was a essentially a solid turn, but for what Math did, which is go on too long with too many pedestrian bars in an elongated turn that would’ve been winnable if it was just more condensed with less filler.

Verdict: Hitman Holla (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Hitman Holla – “It’s a known fact that if you strapped, it’ll never ring, [but] if you see me with a hammer, I’m coming to fix everything!”

Don Ladyii and Casey Jay [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: From QOTR, impressive lyrical performance, filled to the tee with a gang piercing punchlines, real street talk and witty (“Ya head so fucking big, it probably don’t fit in a fitted cap!”) barbs, from Don Ladyii earns the Queens, NY, emcee a draw with a versatile, punch/multi’s and personal-lit Casey Jay. Indeed, after the two battlers opened things up in round 1 with a punchfest for a tie, a slightly more consistently spicy Casey would edge round 2 before Don returned the favor in round 3 of what was overall a dope battle.

Verdict: Debatable

Favorite line: Casey Jay – “Blame whoever set up my last two battles ‘cuz they giving me Fetti the Trap Queen, I’m back out swinging, how you thought I was gonna sleep on you, I’ll blow ya brain through your head to help you think thinsg through!”

Chilla Jones defeats Prep

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Recap: In front of a raucous Smack/URL crowd, “The Kingpen” uses lofty name flips, spirited personals, some witty schemes, wicked wordplay and rapid punchlines to score a 30 on Prep. Indeed, while the well-dressed spitter from Maryland got better with his punches as the battle proceeded, Prep’s angles were too often ubiquitous and that’s when he wasn’t dishing standard heaters that just weren’t as nice as he might’ve thought when he first wrote them up. Add to that, a Chilla Jones with excellent stage presence and a more condensed package suited squarely for the big stage, even if he wasn’t dressed as nice for the fight, Jones’ return to Smack is still a memorable one.

Verdict: Chilla Jones (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Chilla Jones – “This a fucking mismatch, them even putting me against you, I’m nice with the grammar see [Gramercy], that’s why they booked me for the venue!”

Zig Zag defeats Bill Collector

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Recap: In what was a close and gritty punchfest from both battlers, a cleaner-flowing and more consistently spicy Zig Zag gets the win over Bill Collector in this 1-rounder from Body Bag Battle League.

Verdict: Zig Zag (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Zig Zag – “Where the money Bill?, and I’m a need the answer soon, or you gonna see these animals on ya head…think Daniel Boone!”

Hitman Holla defeats Byron Blake

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Recap: Top tier battle rappers get paid to battle no-names all the time, it’s just part of the business. But a dude with battle rap experience, but fresh out of prison from an 8-year bid putting $10K on the line to battle Hitman Holla?!? Well, while that certainly doesn’t happen every day, it definitely speaks to Hitman’s immense popularity and you’d think it’d at least be competitive. The problem for Hitman is, of course, that his verbal acumen doesn’t always match his mass appeal and against a dude with plenty of times to write bars, that could be risky. In this case, after two rounds of dishing aggressive and performance-heavy, but mostly basic bars, Hitman’s lucky that his opponent, Byron Blake, while dipped with plenty of bravado and aggression, really didn’t really put points on the scoreboard till the 3rd round. In other words, a battle with a lotta dough on the line fails to impress and Hitman does just enough to sneak out of there with a win.

Verdict: Hitman Holla (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Hitman Holla – “I’m still warming up, this just a prefix nigger, Showout!, Hey yo Showout!…see, you ain’t even worth the remix, nigger!”

Hazey Williams defeats Bedaffi Green

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Recap: We’ve seen a better (“I know your name Christopher and you supposed to be the wildest in ya city dog, but every fat rapper with a lisp and lazy eye ain’t Biggie Smalls!”) Bedaffi Green and a better Hazey Williams. But despite a sometimes indistinguishable flow, it’s Hazey wild assortment of rich (“You be like Roddy Piper died, I be like ‘So?’…niggas still getting killed in the ring!”) punchlines and nice name flips that gets him the dub in the end.

Verdict: Hazey Williams (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Hazey Williams – “…and face a sentence over your head, are y’all feeling my meme?!”

Danny Myers defeats Danja Zone

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Recap: Despite overperforming at times, the recently on fire Danja Zone gave you three solid (“See the issue, he’s not the most elite of writers, but deserves an Oscar for acting, that’s bologna, what makes you think we need a Meyers [Myers]”) rounds here against Danny Myers, a plethora of nice (“You just mad ‘cuz you not Carter, the team hot, but you not…Ron Harper!”) punchlines and rich performance bars that probably would’ve beaten most rappers. But I don’t know if anyone is fucking with Myers these days as once again his (“I’ll pimp your bitch, but I don’t want her, nigga the whore is yours, I’m just trying to make her flip open the box like Storage Wars!”) haymakers have almost become perfunctory, his bar quotient exceptional, consistently dope (“I’ll blow off a nigga’s ear [points at Danja’s ears then mouth] and tongue over hearsay”) wordplay, flagrant schemes and his punchline (“And that bitch you with is a cum drinker, that ho be quick off the draws like a gunslinger!”) game just leaves you shaking your head begging for more. It’s always something special to see a battler put it all together and in 3-0’ing a hot and dope lyricist like Danja Zone, the dudes holding down that Top Tier room down may have to finally stand aside and let the Bar God in.

Verdict: Danny Myers (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Danny Myers – “Remember these young niggas can’t rap with me, ‘cuz I’m about to turn 36 Zone, that’s the key”

B. Magic defeats Just Juice

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Recap: With arguably one of the weakest (“holes in his body…look like he had a fight with a moose”) punch’s (after a righteous set-up) you’ve ever heard in battle rap, you just knew that Just Juice was in for a long night. And that it was as B. Magic’s consistent flossing and sturdy punchlines make mince meat of Juice’s mostly pedestrian bars to the point that with the battle already decided after two rounds, Juice’s 3rd being cut short (hence the asterisk) because he brought up a couple of Magic’s (who was already as emotional as one has ever seen on stage throughout the battle, perhaps due to battling a local St. Louis rival) dead homies, didn’t really matter.

Verdict: B. Magic (W) 2-0*

Favorite line: B. Magic – “I’ll point at you with the long cap like Uncle Sam!”

Glueazy defeats Killa B

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Recap: After getting obliterated by Glueazy’s rapidly hard (“I’m gang-banging, over them white lines, like you lane changing!”) punches in the opening round, Killa B uses his own assortment of steady gun lines and aggressive (“You got bars that stick, but nothing Super Glue!”) shiners to make things close in rounds 2 and 3. However, a more consistent with his flow, rebuttal-savvy and overall more punch crazy Glueazy still manages to edge each round here for the 3-0.

Verdict: Glueazy (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Glueazy – “You asked for this, see?, strapped with them guns I’m silly, Vivica Fox…it’s gonna hurt when I let go 50!”

Young Kannon defeats SammyWild 100’s

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Recap: In this fiery 3-rounder from Go-Rilla Warfare, SammyWild 100’s delivers the most memorable round, a well-angled and personal-lit 3rd that Young Kannon may’ve had to do some explaining for after the battle. But before that YK’s sublime schemes, persistent mayhem, piercing punchlines, fine wordplay and witty/mocking personals hit with enough consistent heat to take the earlier rounds for the win.

Verdict: Young Kannon (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Young Kannon – “How y’all want it? I could walk up….44 the nigger, or take the knifeand turn his other cheek like I ignored the nigger!”

Swave Sevah defeats Metta

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Recap: Prolific bully bars are the answer here as Swave Sevah looks past the old man/martial arts jokes and other noteworthy punches from a way-too-lengthy Metta and combined with the use of some ringing name flips, boastful darts and mocking personals, takes the latter two rounds of this 3-rounder from King Juce Battle League.

Verdict: Swave Sevah (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Swave Sevah – “Metta brave, but if Metta try to sever Swave, then Metta gonna need more than metaphors, he gonna need Medicaid!”

Jey The Nitewing defeats AKA

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Recap: Lyrical stunting is the m.o. here as the slick, poetic flow of AKA meets up with the raspy, but shrewd punches of Jey The Nitewing for a dope For MCs By MCs 3-rounder that featured a shitload of hitting wordplay throughout from both battlers. A close encounter that saw the two split the first couple of rounds, it’s a more condensed, boastful and quality efficient Nitewing who takes the deciding 3rd round for the win.

Verdict: Jey The Nitewing (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Jey The Nitewing – “Check the score, what Good Will this do if trash is all you get in store?!”

Casey Jay defeats Ms. Miami

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Recap: Damn, never seen anyone react the way Ms. Miami did at being called friendly here. Oh well and good thing too as a no-holds-barred Casey Jay was able to brush the brazen theatrics of her opponent aside,never get off her game, spout a gang of flashy gun bars, stifling punchlines, boastful barbs and piercing name flips in both of the opening rounds (Jay’s 3rd was dope too, but a slightly more condensed and punch-heavier Miami edged that one) on her way to a win in this competitive 3-rounder from QOTR.

Verdict: Casey Jay (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Casey Jay – “I’m the illest at this shit, that’s why they keep calling my jack, they wouldn’t keep flying me from Texas if these bitches could rap!”

Ah Di Boom defeats Dre Dennis

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Recap: A couple of ‘big boned’ guys from Jersey with similar styles of rap…it was only a matter of time before Ah Di Boom and Dre Dennis met up. And result was pretty close what with Boom and Dennis dishing an almost equal amount of fiery gun lines, piercing performance bars, fierce personals and boastful punchlines. But after a more condensed Dre takes round 1 before Boom even things up with a crisper round 2, less filler from Boom coupled with some mediocre personals from Dre allows Ah Di to take the deciding final round for the win.

Verdict: Ah Di Boom (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Ah Di Boom – “This a mean ratchet, it’s fairly odd ‘cuz it’s in [???] mode…[BOOM!!!], the nigger back got the Ricky hole!”

Tnk Tha Demon defeats Gamble

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Recap: Neither Tink Tha Demon or Gamble do much to set the world on fire during this matchup from Cabin Fever 2. But after going toe-to-toe with a lot of righteous filler and aggressive bully bars, it’s Tink who after a slow start uses better punchlines and more fiery lines to sneak ahead in round 2 and easily hold on for the win in the 3rd.

Verdict: Tink Tha Demon (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Tink Tha Demon – “I heard you was a smoker on the low, is it true?, ‘cuz shit I’ll make you spend a bill, then whistle for that white like Emmett Till!”

Lotta Zay defeats Sin City

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Recap: Despite the fact KRS-One told MC Shan (not Busy Bee) that the ‘Bridge Is Over’, thanks in part to a short 3rd round from (“I’m from Brooklyn, where nigga’s will beat your ass with a long branch…and yell ‘Brooklyn!'”) Brooklyn’s Sin City, Lotta Zay spits enough fierce (“My clout higher, but man it’s getting old, so when that .4 getcha, it ain’t Alzheimer’s”) punchlines and dope schemes in rounds 2 and 3 to edge this spirited battle from RBE.

Verdict:  Lotta Zay (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Lotta Zay – “But if he come deep, I squeeze mac, he lean back…like he riding around with the side bitch in the front seat!”

Robb Marley defeats Swamp

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Recap: Even the out-of-nowhere phone convo in the 3rd round doesn’t do much to help Swamp as besides a debatable 2nd round, opponent Robb Marley more condensed lines, lofty personals, witty jokes and ‘shit’-laced punches in the opening and closing rounds prove to be no match for Swamp’s less potent bars and often erratic showing.

Verdict: Robb Marley (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Robb Marley – “I thought you was gay in school, bitch your lip gloss was popping!”

MyVerse defeats Star Smilez

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Recap: Well, after watching this battle, at least we learned a few new things about Star Smilez: she has a Best Buy job to back up her battle rap career, wardrobe-wise she can definitely change it up and dress for the occasion and when she puts forth the effort, like she did during a Dot Mobb-lit and punch-heavy 3rd round, she can certainly rap with some of the best of her fellow Queens. Too bad for Star tho, this battle versus MyVerse was 3 rounds instead of one as Mrs. Smilez would get a handily beat in the previous rounds by the Sandra Bullock lookalike, who while not quite on her A-game and a bit elongated at times, still spouted enough boastful spinners, extra witty personals and heavy-handed punchlines to get the win.

Verdict: MyVerse (W) 2-1

Favorite line: MyVerse – “I don’t believe guts are going up to you and you’re rejecting them, against C3 you wore a skirt so we could decipher who’s the lesbian!”

Geechi Gotti defeats Jay Pan the Future

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Recap: First of all, RIP Young B the Future. That said, no contest in this one as for 3 rounds Geechi Gotti’s wickedly disrespectful barbs (all of which would certainly make Arsonal proud), stunted personals and gang of fiery punchlines easily dismantles the flow-challenged, sometimes witty, but mostly feeble raps of Jay Pan The Future.

Verdict: Geechi Gotti (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Geechi Gotti – “You a steady cornball, steady living a life you not living, straight phony, probably only good with the mic [Mike]…you Scott Pippen!”

JC defeats Psycoses

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Recap: Those who state that JC takes too many battles could point to this one as major proof here as against a barely known (outside of KOTD anyway), but versatile speed rapper in Psycoses, JC’s pen game had barely enough fire in it to beat what were mostly standard (“My best verse now is like Em’s first album, that Infinite”) bars wrapped around some nice (“Orange [aren’t] you glad I didn’t say banana?”) jokes and nifty punchlines. Indeed, except for his back to basics (“And the shit this bitch spitting is fictitious, that’s why nuthin’ believe in you, Unbelievable, BIG difference!”) round two, at times JC bars were just listless and tired. Yeah, thanks in part to some weak angles/nursery rhymes from his opponent and a better bar quotient in round 3, JC edged this one at the end. But this battle still goes to show you why even the best players need to sit out a minute or two out every now and again to get their wind back.

Verdict: JC (W) 2-1

Favorite line: JC – “Metals in his mouth, embrace the glock”

Shotgun Suge defeats Ooops

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Recap: His opponent being well-known for elongated rounds, I’m guessing that Shotgun Suge knew what he was doing when he allegedly requested 90 second rounds here against Ooops. And while Ooops came through with another enlightening (“You telling niggas that you riding around with like 8 burners, and then you tell everybody like you beat like 8 murders, we don’t condone that Suge, I mean that don’t make you a real nigga, that’s real filler, you ain’t beat 8 murders, they just found the real killers”) 3rd round, that wasn’t enough to make up for a couple of slip-ups, but moreso Shotgun Suge’s copacetic (“40. hit him with a combination like a gym lock!”) gun bars, gripping personals and animated shit-talking in the first 2 rounds. In other words, looks like Suge played his cards just right.

Verdict: Shotgun Suge (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Shotgun Suge – “What your life like nigga? Ferguson? Protesting? Marching, you the show setter, I’m from Newark nigga, the cops? Know better”

Born defeats Gjonaj

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Recap: Versatility is the name of the game here as Born’s variety of winning personals, soaring (“Dumping off 9’s for practice out the van like soccer mom’s!”) punchlines, feelgood snaps and wicked wordplay overcomes Gjonaj’s aggressive (“I’ll snap his neck and have him looking over his shoulder like it ain’t happened yet”) dalliances and heated performance bars in both rounds 1 and 2 to take the win.

Verdict: Born (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Born – “The real Dizaster is him not using his own style!”

Jakkboy Maine defeats Peedy Westro

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Recap: Clearly, from the direction a wide percentage of his bars was headed, this battle was a lot more personal for Peedy Westro than it was for Jakkboy Maine. Still, even with Peedy efficiently (and loudly) getting a lot off chest regarding Jakk’s alleged shenanigans outside the ring, Jakk’s more steady and intricate punches, lofty gun bars and fanatical wordplay wins the day in what was overall a pretty dope 1-rounder from Bars Bendas Rap Battle League.

Verdict: Jakkboy Maine (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Jakkboy Maine – “Look, a redneck in tobacco, you asking him, I’ll jaw crack him, a bulldog, K-9, Paris Hilton, I’m a dog catcher!”

B. Dot defeats Stricc

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Recap: B. Dot versus Stricc, the infamous race wars battle that made World Star and thanks in part to a classic and perfectly executed 3rd round from Dot, put everyone’s favorite Black activist/battle rapper on the map. A credit to LA Battle Groundz for putting on this battle, but for all the fame B. Dot got from this stellar performance, what easily gets lost in this matchup is just how dope Stricc was. The Texas battler with an almost perfect poker face, dishing 3 hot rounds of spicy (“Pay homage pimpin’, I’m droppin’ wisdom, if Lux taught him anything it should’ve been to bring that coffin with him!”) personals, pointed poor white man semantics, tailored rebuts on white supremacy and piercing punchlines that added up to a gang of haymakers throughout the match and kept things competitive. But with rich epilogues on Black history, systematic breakdowns on the benefits of white privilege, flexing (“Look Stricc, don’t bore me with the fuck shit, all that, “Oh you sound like Lux shit”, look the compliment is enormous, but it’s really not that important, they even told Kobe he play like Jordan but that ain’t stop him for scorin’!”) punchlines, mocking name flips and fiery schemes/punchlines that showcased both a scholarly and street degree for militant abolitionism, outside of a debatable 2nd round that was equal when it came to the ratio of haymakers, it’s B. Dot who takes the 1st and 3rd rounds for the win here.

Verdict: B. Dot (W) 2-1

Favorite line: B. Dot – “So what make you think you a part of this? Who gave you some “How to be black” starter kit?, I mean they whitewashed black history, it’s only right that I blackout and wash this white boy to re-author it!”

JC and Xcel (DEBATABLE)

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Recap: As expected, a barfest between Xcel and JC. It’s Xcel who edges first round with slightly better wordplay and (“You came up punching on bums, like the Knock Out game!”) personals than the name-flip heavy and always robust (“You throw punches, but the hands is missing, this is Man 1 to vandalism”) JC. Round two is another tight round, but JC edges this one with more consistency, rich (“I don’t dig up on niggas, even tho yours is everywhere!”) personals and fiery anecdotes in lieu of Xcel rapid punchlines that almost got usurped by the easy choice to once gain go after JC’s noted dance move video. Again, things stayed close in the 3rd round with both JC and Xcel dropping (JC: “I still got something in store for your dogs like Petco, but brought the kick back for sales [Cel] like Retro’s”; Xcel: “I’ll let it ring and hit everyone…like open marriage!”) some gems and nice schemes, but neither battler, after splitting the first couple of rounds, did that much to stand out or differentiate themselves….so call it even.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: Xcel – “License to kill? Nigga you still get carded for spliffs”

Big Hann defeats Bonus

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Recap: Proving to have more gas left in his tank than his less potent opponent, Big Hann’s more formidable 3rd round, an unremitting and solid turn of aggressive bully bars, wit, street semantics and mean punchlines, is the difference maker in this fiery 3-rounder versus Bonus.

Verdict: Big Hann (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Big Hann – “You got bars, but no gift, that’s Christmas in prison!”

K-Shine defeats J Dose

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Recap: Maybe he’s just been inspired by all the new guys around him…DNA, Big T, etc., all the dope lyricists in the NWX. Maybe he’s just remembering to eat his Wheaties every morning…ahhh, the heck with it. Whatever the reason, this 2015 version of K-Shine, whether battling solo and in 2-on-2’s, is on a killing spree, commanding the stage and dropping haymakers on a whim, spouting too-rich (“I’ll let that bitch fly for cheap, that’s rainbows, he could conversate from a box, let’s Tango!”) performance bars at a drop of a dime and rapidly delivering fiery bar after bar with little room to breath. As a lukewarm J. Dose found out here…zip him up, no debating.

Verdict: K-Shine (W) 1-0

Favorite line: K-Shine – “Stomach shot, head shot, niggas is moonwalking!”

Aye Verb defeats Cortez

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Recap: Snapping with a boatload of earnest punchlines, unloading some fierce/witty personals, smooth and boastful with the barbs, dishing some dope ‘Showtimes’, and kind enough to offer up some rigid battle rap tutorials, a performance-lit Aye Verb takes advantage of a mostly mediocre Cortez for 3 rounds to handily get the hometown win in this battle brought to you from King Juce Battle League.

Verdict: Aye Verb (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Aye Verb – “Where you write from, it’s lemon scent, mine’s limitless!”

Cortez defeats J. Murda

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Recap: In a long-awaited matchup, Cortez deftly uses his ring experience, rich performance bars and sizzling (“The Blueprint, yeah I’m a Renegade, I’mma end {Em] J [Jay]”) wordplay to easily take out an overmatched and seemingly (till his 3rd round anyway) uninspired J. Murda.

Verdict: Cortez (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Cortez – “I’m respected in every hood and project on Murder Ave, and I be supplying who be supplying Murda’s Ave”

Marv Won and Super Black [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: Overall, Marvwon had the better (“It’s crazy how being Lost is going to put you on the map with a Legend!”) lines. But a handful of surprising stumbles from the Detroit emcee along with Super Black’s ability to hold his own with a cohesive and versatile flow as well as a nice performance that was capped by his girl jumping in for a spitfire ‘Gun So Big’ bar, adds up to, in this base, a debatable.

Verdict: TIE

Favorite line: Marvwon – “Nigga, you loyal to ya gang?, Nigga I’ll put you in a box reppin’ COTS forever!”

E-Hart defeats C3

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Recap: Landing (“You lucky bitch, this should have been on a different card, it’s like you moved up on the donor’s list, is how you was given Hart [heart]”) haymakers without conscious, dropping hard (“They said shit I could expose but why bother, you’ll turn Clips and scream you was raised by your mama, salute that, she taught you morals, how to stand up with honor, but all that ass, they say you got it from your father!”) personals that literally had her opponent get caught up in her emotions and spitting a higher (“School’s in, recess over, who’s next in line?, everybody gotta learn, it’s no child left behind!”) bar quotient throughout with a flourescent flow and agile delivery, E-Hart delivers the goods with enough fire in rounds 1 and 2 to take out a highly (“‘Cuz I came to bomb on you, in this letter I wrote, every page grenades, strapped with razor blades, to cut Hart like we playing spades”!) competitive, but not as consistent C3. Obviously still thinking she could take the match, a more aggressive C3 saved her strongest (“…’cuz I wanna know, how you make it so far E, when you never been charged up enough to go Back to Back?”) round for the 3rd, but despite some (“But keep up with me, because MC squared, that’s a two, but what happens when you give that emcee 3?, she getting cubed”; “If y’all thought she was gonna school me like Joe Clark, I guess everybody on E side [Eastside] high”) shiners and crazy wordplay here and there, a little too much filler, elongated set-ups, schemes that failed to land and Hart’s dazzling performance cost her early.

Verdict: E-Hart (W) 2-1

Favorite line: E-Hart – “I’m laughing at how these hoes be acting, I’m twice as real, if I ain’t got it, I’ll reach for your gun, like I like to steal, y’all like that ignorant shit, but I’m righteous still, the left keep the peace, but nigga I got a right to kill!”)

Chef Trez defeats Dre Dennis

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Recap: Less filler, more potent (“The kid strapped over all [overall], but I don’t see the menace in Dennis”) rhymes, sanguine angles/set-ups and a few (“”You a bitch, so stay in ya place like a ho should, I use the toast good and I’ll raise and let it go like ‘Welcome to Adulthood’!”) haymakers mixed in gets Spit Dat Heat’s Chef Trez the first two rounds and a win over the ever aggressive and (“The kick back done left my wrist damaged, so like I’m using tally marks, I can’t help but draw the fifth slanted!”) bar-heavy, but this time around less consistent Dre Dennis.

Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Chef Trez -“This left [holds up left fist]? Chinese porn, it get nasty with the chin!”

Jakkboy Maine defeats Cae Krueger

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Recap: Hip to pointing out how many ways (“But what it do, right left, pick a direction, hang your life right in front of you, give a different perspective!”) he can destroy his opponent, a confident and assertive Jakkboy Maine makes quick work of a competitive, but not-quite-ready-for-the-main-stage Cae Krueger.

Verdict: JakkboyMaine (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Jakkboy Maine – “I’ll bust his wig and like Dad’s seeing they kids, I’ll throw it up in the air…Yeah!, that’s a nice visit!”

Shotgun Suge defeats T-Top

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Recap: When it comes to Shotgun Suge, it’s never really been a question about his performance or his ability to ‘talk that shit’ that the so-called real street dudes love so much. Hell, independent of his renowned shock value bars, Suge can even hit the occasional haymaker or two. Instead with Suge his won-loss record has almost always relied on a combination of his motivation, delivery and consistency and too often he’s failed to deliver the three with any efficiency. Well, T-Top must’ve awoken to the real Gooch in Suge because after watching this battle I dare anyone to find a more sublime Shotgun. From jump, in what was expected to be a slugfest just on name alone, both Top and Suge came to kill. First round sees Top rip the stage with wild gun bars and fiending (“….leave a pudding cup and a note that say Cosby did it”) anecdotes. Only when he tried to personal, rehashing Suge’s Detroit adventures, did Top not hit quite as hard. For Suge, who usually does his best work in the first round anyway, the gameplan was about the bars matching the aggression/performance and on this night they (“I got the D, but I give him the Cal, headshot [points gun at Top’s head], make him sit Indian style”; “Bandana on the barrel, shit built like a Swiffer mop!”) certainly did…for all 3 rounds. Still, Suge’s overall showing doesn’t take away from Top’s at times fiery lyrical (“I’ll smack the shit out your bitch with a boat starter!”) aggression and potent punchlines, which edged him the 2nd round over a still persistently (“You’ze a fraud nigga, say that, the streets? we don’t know you, like the bitch that scream ‘Maybach’!”) nice Suge, who only got edged for keeping his round a little too short. Last round saw both battlers stay high off that dope shit. And while Top’s continual street (“I like to play laser tag, but with a gun clip”) tales and storytelling bars kept the crowd on edge, Suge did him one better stalking the stage with a highly (“Put needles in her body, but I ain’t a voodoo doctor!”) entertaining and versatile performance that not only kept the crowd open, but more importantly got him the win.

Verdict: Shotgun Suge (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Shotgun Suge – “She call me for the bricks, I pull up on her like a Uber driver, and tell her what to do with the work, like a supervisor”

DNA defeats Serius Jones

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Recap: Serius Jones’ return to the URL stage is a topsy-turvy one as after laying down and pretty much giving up the first round with a load of lackluster (“Take half your head off like Casio, and after that plastic around your face, I bet your G shock”) bars/schemes versus DNA’s steady (“You are one of the worse, word to Eric you in for a long Sermon, be smart, or see hawks [Seahawks] as soon as I call Sherman”) wordplay, fiery personals and aggressive bars, it looked like Mr. GTFOH was on his way to an easy 3-0. But out of nowhere Jones made things competitive in round two, although DNA shined with both his rebuttal (“Yo Serius Jones you fucking up a bad rhyme, nigga stop talking while I rap, you seen what happened last time!”) and punchline (“Your career should’ve been took a hike, Roethlisberger”) game, Jones edged the round with some righteous (“How could call me a hypocrite or front me ‘cuz I’m living lux and I never even act religious, but I prayed over every bag I sold, yeah I’m sacrilegious!”) haymakers and punchlines that finally hit. However, with a chance to win things in the 3rd round, Jones came apart again with mostly lame bars, name flips that fell totally flat thanks in part to getting his opponent’s government name (that’s ‘Eric St John’ NOT ‘Eric Wright’) wrong and spits a Queens scheme that came off hard, but lacked the linguistics to back it up. And while DNA’s 3rd wasn’t resounding either, at the end of the day he had much cleaner, (“Now Smack called me, I was getting some head, he said I got a battle for you and it might involve you getting some bread, I jumped up, grabbed my tooth out the water, pushed the bitch off the bed…”) funnier and consistent round.

Verdict: DNA (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Serius Jones – “I’mma tell y’all what GTFOH could stand for in your case…ok, it could be ‘Got The Face Of Hurt!'”

Ill Will defeats Jay Rell

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Recap: Along with a couple of fly rebuttals, Jay Rell’s witty barbs are perfunctory enough to edge round 3. But before that, assisted by an opponent that was ill on wit, but mostly pedestrian when it came to punchlines, Ill Will’s piercing bully bars, stinging set-ups and raucous personals/gun bars are easily formidable enough to take the opening rounds for the win in this 3-rounder from Michigan’s Alpha League Rap Battles league.

Verdict: Ill Will (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Ill Will – “This bitch [holds up hand like a gun] ain’t got no bodies, but Jay’s mom could be the first one on it like The Black Album!”

Math Hoffa defeats Crome

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Recap: Surely, O-Zone Battles could’ve found a better opponent for the ‘American rapper’ Math Hoffa than Crome, who overplayed his angles, reached hard on too many bars and for the most part fell (“Just like you not paying child support, Math doesn’t add up”) flat with his personals–all of which even made Math wonder out loud how he ended up battling this guy. Math, who was a little lazy at times with the pen, still brought enough of a B-game floor (“[holds hands like long gun] Say everything you gotta say to me in front of this shotty, then ‘BOOM!!!’ I open Crome like I don’t fuck with Safari”) Crome with the wordplay, tickle the crowd’s funny bones with the jokes and overwhelmed his opponent with the fierce personals to score an easy 3-0.

Verdict: Math Hoffa (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Math Hoffa – “How the fuck could you not heat up?, you the biggest hole in the O-Zone!”

Rum Nitty defeats Quill

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Recap: A gun bar-heavy and altogether rousing round one from Rum Nitty sets the tone early in this Don’t Flop match against Quill, leading to an almost-as-solid and more versatile second round that gives the Phoenix battler the bout, before Quill (who struggled with his flow in the first two rounds) salvages the 3rd with what would be his best round: a steady diet of nice, self-deprecating raps and witty barbs.

Verdict: Rum Nitty (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Rum Nitty – “I’m in the spot with a pocket rocket, it sound little but it ain’t, remind you of Shallow Hal ‘cuz this bitch is bigger than you think!”

Reepah Rell defeats Teewhy

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Recap: What with Beasley co-hosting, one could garner a pretty good guess as to what contributed to Teewhy and Reepah Rell both making it to the URL stage. That’s how fire and competitive this matchup was, with punches galore from both battlers, the required split of the first two rounds and a pretty fire and tight deciding 3rd–that’s usually the prerequisite for dope battle. A more condensed, performance/wordplay strutting and a bit harder (“Rocket, long as hell, you’d think that I pack Yao!”; “Everybody want to be a hero till they find out how much the Subway [sub weigh]!”) hitting overall Reepah takes the first, before Teewhy comes back in the later half of his 2nd round with some rapid heat and loud (“You giving a shot?, how generous, I want you to keep it!”; “I wet God…he Poseidon!”) haymakers that got him the edge there. 3rd round, as a whole, was yet another punchfest. But with Rell offering up not only some hard shiners, but more steely name flips and personals that deftly landed, his versatility over a solid, but a bit elongated turn by Teewhy gives the former the win.

Verdict: Reepah Rell (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Reepah Rell – “You could tell a nigger that never shot a gun round just happy making up gun sounds!”

Snake Eyez defeats Pirelli

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Recap: Despite both needing some work on their delivery, Snake Eyez and Pirelli put aside the small talk, jokes and personals for mostly straight punches and braggadocio bars in this aggressive one-rounder from BattleCity TV. Going second after a solid round from his opponent, Pirelli spits a dope South Park scheme and does just (“You died before I wrote to you, do y’all recall Stan?”) enough to make it close, but it’s Snake Eyez who gets the win in the end for delivering more consistently fiery and colorful (“Find out where you live and swerve through, give it time?, fuck it, I’m in the crib by 9, like I got that curfew!”) content.

Verdict: Snake Eyez (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Snake Eyez – “So don’t stand there with the sad face, I’ll make your girl get low like the start of a track race!”

C3 defeats Bonnie Godiva

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Recap: Besides delivering a gritty (and witty at times) talking too on Bonnie Godiva’s alleged personal life, battle rap drama, wayward aggression and even her looks, C3 also holds nothing back on her opponent when it comes to salacious darts, righteous punches, clever set-ups, flexing wordplay and piercing name flips in this 3-rounder from QOTR. And while Bonnie too came hard throughout this battle (esp. during a dope 3rd that saw a spitfire rebuttal) with a versatile punch-game that once again proved how much her pen has improved over time, one too many shots at heads that weren’t her opponent, in addition to a slight lack of consistency with the heat, allows C3 to handily take both of the opening rounds for the win before a debatable 3rd.

Verdict: C3 (W) 2-1

Favorite line: C3 – “You ain’t gonna understand these rounds I’m giving you till later, I teach like Mr. Miyagi Bonnie!’

Chilla Jones defeats Dizaster

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Recap: Chilla Jones does a better impression of Dizaster than Diz does on Chilla. That said, in yet another 2-round battle for Dizaster, while neither battler was really on their A-game, a more condensed, personal and direct with the punches Chilla manages to take each round for a victory that was also helped in part by Diz’s emotional harangues, indirect shots and overuse of filler.

Verdict: Chilla Jones (W) 2-0

Favorite line: Chilla Jones – “Keep it a hundred, you got a problem with drugs, you need to pass the pipe, could tell by how this male function, he ain’t acting right, [so] please react to everything he rap tonight, ‘cuz if y’all are silent when this Buster Rhyme, that’s When Disaster Strike!”

D Money defeats True Indeed

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Recap: Putting aside the vet vs. new era chatter that only a true We Go Hard stan could really embrace, for 3 rounds True Indeed and D Money engage in a gritty, fiery and competitive battle that was littered with hardbody street missives, mocking/witty personals, stinging gun bars and solid punchlines. A clash that also featured plenty of boastful barbs, Steams mention’s (from Money) and your to-be-expected name flips on both sides, it’s a slightly more pronounced, bar efficient and rich storytelling Money who gets the win, edging both the 1st and 2nd rounds before a slightly more punch-heavier True took the 3rd.

Verdict: D Money (W) 2-1

Favorite line: D Money – “I would say fuck your entire race…but my connect Spanish!”

Danny Myers defeats Xcel

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Recap: It takes a lot of chutzpa to call yourself “Bar God”, but with performances like this one Danny Myers just might be onto something. Here he not only spits fiery, wide-eyed (“Your white fans love you, they amazed you can spit this well, ironic it’s only the blacks that getting sick of ‘Cel [sickle cell]”) punchlines with relative ease, but outduels fellow wordsmith Xcel with an arsenal of pointed name flips and effervescent (“If there RZA [is a] weakest nigga in your crew it’d be U-God [you, God]”) haymakers for all three rounds. Credit Xcel, despite continuing to struggle a bit with his delivery, for coming back from surprising round 1 choke to make things (“And bro’ my intention ain’t fucked up, this an intervention because Danny the Bar God is punch drunk!”; “I’ll take a 6 inch blade and connect your freckles!”) competitive in the latter rounds. But altogether Myers resilience and (“Bitch I’ll drown your child, I’mma sick type, around midnight, you’ll see me holding your baby under water like a midwife!”) fortitude was just too much to handle.

Verdict: Danny Myers (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Danny Myers – “Nigga I went postal, I’m fucking up his name like when parents be using their kids social!”

Aye Verb and Grizz Guru [DEBATABLE]

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Recap: The ‘Showtime’ was a little ‘meh’, but some witty barbs (esp. the shot at the look-a-like Smack host) and head-ringing punches from Aye Verb allows him to thwart an upset from the righteous set-ups/schemes and rigid wordplay of Grizz Guru and force a debatable in this 1-rounder from Iron Mouth Battles.

Verdict: Debatable

Favorite line: Grizz Guru – “You shoulda chose a name like Malcolm X, I mean you both two nigga’s famous for dying on a Harlem stage!”

Jerry Wess defeats Kyd Slade

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Recap: Hard aggressive bars throughout from both (“Give a fuck if you with your man’s, nigga fuck your troops, you asking for war?, I’m like ‘nawm–umm‘ yeah I’m good like I ain’t got much to do, [points at dudes behind Jerry] cuz’ you could get it, you can get it, you can get it and you can get it, nigga I’m talking more rounds than the first Lux and Mook!”) Kyd Slade and (“Head shot, give him a nasty attitude, rolled eyes, I only send the Mac’s [Cinemax] like I can’t afford Showtime!”) Jerry Slade in this 3-round battle from iBattle League. But a too short round 2 and a case of stumbles in round 1 by Slade along with consistently fiery lines and relentless (“And he front on me bully style, liek he got the grip? watch how fast I support your clothing line…[flexes hand like punch] and rock your shit!”) punches/schemes across the board from Jerry gives Wess a well-earned 3-0.

Verdict: Jerry Wess (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Jerry Wess – “I’ll walk up right up to your whip, like you asked directions, and beat the bricks off this nigga…he won’t pass inspection!”

Big Hann defeats P.G. Skillet

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Recap: Dishing mean and descriptive gun bars with willful abandon, when he wasn’t flexing on his opponent with aggressive braggadocio lines, after a debatable 1st round, Big Hann gets the drop on an inconsistent P.G. Skillet in the latter rounds to score a win.

Verdict: Big Hann (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Big Hann – “You came in here with nothing to lose, thinking what you spit shine, you just here to buff up my shoes!”

Prep defeats Billy Bars

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Recap: Billy Bars actually spits a pretty (“I’ll let a Furious 7 hit you after 6, that’s Fast 5!”) decent 2nd round, but it’s still not enough to survive Prep’s more flexing wordplay, sparky rebuttals and witty freestyles.

Verdict: Prep (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Prep – “There’s only one thing you feel from seeing Bill…bored, why advertise him?!”

Mack Mel defeats Rosenberg Raw

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Recap: Stunting with mostly fiery gun bars that was backed by an ill performance, Mack Mel knocks off a pretty ordinary and inconsistent Rosenberg Raw in this rare 2-rounder from Spittaz League.

Verdict: Mack Mel (W) 2-0

Favorite line: Mack Mel – “Keep gun-butting his forehead until he remember the serial number!”

Bill Collector defeats ZitroTheGreat

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Recap: If not for a close first round a Bill Collector totally on his A-game would’ve caught a body here against a grade-E for effort, but nowhere near bar-heavy ZitroTheGreat. Sure, Zitro had a couple of pointed (“But I’m a league owner, so I’m tired of bending over backwards for rappers who only show up when they stats hurt”) moments, but too many exquisite gun bars, nice storytelling schemes, dope (“Success the sweetest flavor, I only wanted a taste, if God wanted us perfect, the pencil wouldn’t erase”) soliloquies and animated punchlines from BC put this one away quick after the opening round.

Verdict: Bill Collector (W) 3-0

Favorite line: Bill Collector – “That chopper spit a different language bitch, Pootie Tang!”

K-Shine defeats Dirtbag Dan

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Recap: K-Shine slips a little bit towards the end, but thanks in part to Big T’s out of nowhere animated gun racket’s and a couple of quality (“I got two guns, I’m using both then shits, Ash Kash, Cortez, they both got Clipped”) freestyles that may’ve saved him from possibly choking, Shine’s round of mostly fiery performance bars easily outpoints what was a pretty inconsistent round from Dirtbag (“I’m in Holyoke, Mass. for the weekend like a college kid on a heroin binge!”) Dan. Indeed, despite the presence of the guy in front of him, with possibly only one day to prepare Dan didn’t seem able to come up with enough lines for DNA’s replacement.

Verdict: K-Shine (W) 1-0

Favorite line: K-Shine – “Go ahead and start somethin’, I got this red light just to alarm somethin’, large button, have your whole family dressed like they job hunting!”

Nunn Nunn defeats D. Flamez

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Recap: Nunn Nunn edges round 1 here against the ever intense and aggressive D Flamez with more versatility in the bars as well as better creativity with his (“Style on me, if I believe he flex, I’m at his babymom crib, big-ass Tek, Dave Mirra shit, get you b m x, or your cracked head [crackhead] turn to God…DMX!”) haymakers, before dominating round two with outrageous wordplay and schemes that had the crowd shook. Flamez, displaying some nice resiliency, comes back with an (“His main bitch keep the rock hard just like the caine jumping, anytime I battle I bring fire to the ring, like when Kane coming!”) effervescent round 3 to avoid a 3-0 in this Proving Grounds matchup from URL.

Verdict: Nunn Nunn (W) 2-1

Favorite line: Nunn Nunn – “If ya bitch say she faithful, that slut’s a liar, she ain’t shit without the John, I call her Syah!”

Goodz defeats Rone

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Recap: Rone versus Goodz makes for an odd matchup on paper, but the two battle rap vets still put on a highly entertaining battle nonetheless in this one-rounder from KOTD. Going first, Rone does Rone: plenty of white-boy swag with an oft-frenzied mix of potent (“You have the body type of an overstuffed teddy bear, all that extra flesh God and you couldn’t stick a neck in there?”) jokes, rapid schemes, animated name flips and robust (“Paper or plastic, man I got a bag for the goods, I will put you in the news, like Noah the story could, we’ll tune into Good Morning America to see America mourning Goodz!”) punchlines. But it’s Goodz (despite making it clear how much he was only doing this battle for the bread), who’s always the favorite when it comes to one-rounders, that uses a more versatile and condensed mix of splendid wordplay, fresh out the box puns, witty (“I’m battling a real good kid, this don’t even seem right, the toughest thing you ever did probably was cross the street on a green light”) personals and real rap (“Slow down Goodz you using them, when times get hard for me I go to selling drugs, they get hard for you, you go to using them!”) talk to take this one in the end.

Verdict: Goodz (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Goodz – “I don’t care about this battle so much…nigga, I’m rooting for YOU!”

Skates defeats TGO

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Recap: Plenty of fire punchlines and mayhem dished from sides in this one-round battle between (“These battle nigga’s make a little change and they spit some garbage shit, my nigga, Birdman couldn’t pay me to drop the bar to 6!”) Skates and (“Nigga, I’m in monster mode, shooting crazy guns, nigga’s think I got a Contra code!”0 TGO. However Skates, with a little less on the filler and darts on the pedestrian side, gets the edge here.

Verdict: Skates (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Skates – “No borders, when it’s beef with pill poppers and coke snorters, deuce-five in his face..close quarters!”

Charron defeats Dotz

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Recap: Rare written’s (over beats) and freestyle battle between Charron and Dotz from Don’t Flop easily goes Charron’s way as the Canadian battler’s stable flips, sturdy punchlines and oft-ringing name flips/personals were more than enough to win a majority of both the written rounds and the freestyle’s.

Verdict: Charron (W) 15-8

Favorite line: Charron – “You look like a metrosexual baseball player!”

Glueazy defeats Billie Dutches

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Recap: In this one-rounder from Body Bag Battle League, Glueazy spits a nice assortment of braggadocio/bully bars, a dope performance  and fiery schemes to get a victory over a sporadic and basic bar prone Billie Dutches.

Verdict: Glueazy (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Glueazy -“Billie?!, Billie?!, this is who y’all was speaking about?, huh?!, well fuck it, I’ll move the bucket like [there’s] a leak in the house!”

Born defeats Kaboom

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Recap: Kaboom says he took this QuietRoom Battle on 3 days notice and it shows what with too many repetitive bars/themes, something even a lackadaisical, but punch-drenched Born can take advantage of in a one-rounder that shouldn’t have been as close.

Verdict: Born (W) 1-0

Favorite line: Born – “Raise the gauge like being raised by gay’s, you’ll get a couple pop’s!”