Recap: Pretty lit (for his first two rounds anyway), gritty and punch-heavy showing by C Moneii gets beat back hard by 3 superb, versatile, punchline-spazzing, Cave Gang-repping and personal-heavy rounds from Young Kannon in this mostly competitive matchup from Bullpen Battle League.
Verdict: Young Kannon (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Young Kannon – “I call up the cuzzo’s, heaters get gripped, whatever car you came in, we Swiss-cheesing the shit, I’m Mexican right?, that mean the whole family squeeze in [squeezing] the whip!”
Recap: Put aside the requisite stinging rebuttals and glistening gun bars for a second and spotlight an exquisite punch game from Chef Trez here against a pretty solid and hard-fought effort from ShowStoppa in this 1-rounder from No Coast Raps. Indeed, with the ability to also mix in some fire name flips and head-ringing set-ups, for the Chef this versatile and flexing round would turn out to be just another day at the office.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “I wanted smoke with Killer B, I feel it’s about time, and now it’s ShowStoppa I gotta out shine, but a known fact, when you beat up on the little bro it always makes the big brother come outside!”
Recap: Leaving your card in the ATM slot, failing to take any money out and leaving it in to let your man use it too? Hmmm, hope they remember to take out the camera’s before they bounce. That said, in this 1-round Social Distance battle from RBE, both Jai 400 Block and Bankhead bring the heat with Jai leaning on some stifling name flips and a host of gritty punches. And while Bankhead failed to deliver any Coronavirus-related lines, his frenzied (“I’ll give J the smith [Jada Smith] all it takes is some Will power!”) wordplay and steely narratives came with enough smoke to warrant a tie.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Jai 400 Block – “Catch up [ketchup], you in hindsight [Heinz], I know you must heard [mustard] about me!”
Recap: Premiere Rap Battle League 1-rounder sees the cold, old-school and unintentionally witty at times flow of GS get back back by a not so clean, but still more potent, spirited, mayhem-drenched, scheme-friendly and name-flip spazzing Holmzie da God.
Verdict: Holmzie Da God (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Holmzie Da God – “Bitch I ain’t like your ass since preschool, I couldn’t recite my ABC’s without saying ‘F’ G!”
Recap: Raucous 1-rounder between Piranha and Reck goes the Detroit battler’s way as Piranha’s prolific punch game, littered with gritty name flips, stunted gun bars and some jaunty wordplay combines to beat back a solid, but not as formidable showing by Reck.
Verdict: Piranha (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Piranha – “You ain’t even the man in Toledo, but wanna talk like you God tier, bitch we don’t allow fear, nigger’s pay cash only at the barber shop so what make you think your credit gonna cut it around here?!”
Recap: If you’re going to resort to mayhem, you might as well as stick with it as after a lukewarm, but still pretty raucous 1st round, Jai 400 Block ups the ante on his bar efficiency in the latter two rounds, mixing in a boatload of more perfunctory heat along with wily personals and stinging punchlines/wordplay to edge a brazen Lu Castro who started off well, but in rounds 2 and 3 was a little all over the place when it came to angles, all the while resorting to hit-n-miss gun bars when he couldn’t keep his themes more in sync.
Verdict: Jai 400 Block (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Jai 400 Block – “You from the Bronx, but who found you?, the Bronx is where Hip-Hop started from the ground too, you a clown Lu, but [???] nobody’s heard or foreseen you before, so I’m guessing you ain’t from Soundview!”
Recap: Pretty close Quarantine battle as Bill Collector’s punches were more spicy than not. However, some dated bars from Bill along with an always-on-go Rum Nitty squeezing out a consistent barrage of fiery gun bars. fierce name flips and gritty punchlines/wordplay, gave the Phoenix, AZ capo the win.
Verdict: Rum Nitty (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Rum Nitty – “Chopper blaze, this shit take care of Bill as soon as it hit…I got Auto Pay!”
Recap: Highly competitive and fiery battle between Nu Jerzey Twork and Bad Newz contains a festive load of head-ringing gun bars, gripping street narratives, some wily personals and a boatload of stinging punchlines/name flips from both battlers. Tied going into the deciding 3rd round and even in light of yet another stifling turn by Newz, a more intricate with the punches and condensed Twork edges it in the end.
Verdict: Nu Jerzey Twork (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Nu Jerzey Twork – “I blow the weapon, you try to play me fool then a heckler pop, y’all know I recycle…so I’m a put Newz in a special box!”
Recap: A 1-round RBE Social Distance battle between J. Murda and Danny Myers sees both battlers wreck the shop with plenty of havoc and artful boasts. But Danny, a little more consistent with his bar potency as well as displaying better use at incorporating his opponent’s ism’s into his bars, edges this one.
Verdict: Danny Myers (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Danny Myers – “They never seen a nigga from the West spit so clever, listen J [Jay] I started my Dynasty with the greatest intro ever!”
Recap: Since he probably wouldn’t have to leave his crib to do one, I’m guessing that league owners may want to think about getting more ‘Quarantine’ battles out of Qleen ‘Mr. No Show’ Paper while they can. That said, dope 1-rounder here between Qleen and Swave Sevah, but a slightly more gritty, personal and Coronavirus-themed-with-the-punches Swave gets this one.
Verdict: Swave Sevah (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Swave Sevah – “We’ll do Qleen [clean] filthy, see my fam with the shit’s, we been masked and gloved up before this Pandemic hit!”
Recap: RBE 1-round Social Distance battle between Blve Cocaine and Yoshi G finds the versatile and performance-heavy Blve talking to Yoshi in a no-nonsense manner via a bunch of fiery punchlines, rich storytelling and salacious personals with creative visuals to match her swag/narrative. On the other hand, a Yoshi who while stunting with the personals and spitting a couple of hot lines, clearly wasn’t trying to get too much in her bag what with a lack of effort during a shortened and topsy-turvy turn.
Verdict: Blve Cocaine (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Blve Cocaine – “We not the same, you been a lame, giving all that head and still don’t use your brain!”
Recap: From URL, against a Shotgun Suge who for the most part kept it pretty condensed and ordinary for all three rounds, Jerry Wess uses a barrage of performance-stunting mayhem, fiery punchlines/wordplay and heated gun lines to easily take rounds 1 and 3 (call the 2nd debatable) for the win.
Verdict: Jerry Wess (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Jerry Wess – “Yeah, go ahead and tap my pockets, you ain’t getting shit without the pin number!”
Recap: My guess is that Ill Will had someplace he needed to be in a hurry as he ends this HanknationTV 1-rounder against a gritty, but a bit flow-challenged and topsy-turvy King Chi early in his round, using some mind-numbling name flips and gun bars to deliver the kill before settling back with more fiery punchlines, witty screeds and scattered boasts on his way to an easy win.
Verdict: Ill Will (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Ill Will – “Gimme my fee, it ain’t a nigger in battle rap realer than me, and I’m a jealous guy, I’m mad Corona out here acting like it’s iller than me!”
Recap: Dope, 1-round RBE Social Distance battle between Ooops and Rosenberg (“I’m a shooter, I stay with the Tek, put three O’s [holes] in ya body, P.S. I just put ya name in the flesh!”) Raw has them both kicking a load of hot punchlines with a nice mix of stirring wordplay, witty personals and hitting name flips. With about 2 minutes each and an equal amount of haymakers and very little filler, let’s not only call this one a draw, but hopefully when things start getting back to normal, bring ’em back for 3 rounds.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Ooops – “Just cause you look white and animated don’t make you King of the Hill!”
Recap: Real solid effort from Mark Anthony who came with a host of piercing punchlines and rich self-depreciating bars to stay competitive in the first two rounds before struggling with his flwo and having to shorten his 3rd. But Chef Trez being Chef Trez, with a host of sizzling gun bars, fire rebuttals and rapidly hitting punches still takes this one, pretty handily.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “But on the other hand, what I’m squeezing sick, it’s a big 9 like…what you been feeding it?!”
Recap: Forgive us for wishing the likes of Chef Trez versus 1st-timer-to-RBE Quantum Physics could happen on a big stage (and maybe one day it will) instead of a 1-round Social Distance battle. But in some abnormal times, you have to take whatever you can get. And both QP and the Chef still showed up with the latter dishing plenty of resident heat, some spitfire punches and fiery requisite name flips, while a wordplay-spazzing, pointed, punch-lit and performance-heavy QP made for a crazy dope debut. That said, with a little less filler in a battle that was pretty equal on haymakers, the edge here goes to QP.
Verdict: Quantum Physics (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Quantum Physics – “He got a extra round in the funeral home for trying to rebuttal in the casket!”
Recap: Houston Bar Code 1-rounder between Flatline vet Boogie and Big T sees the former spout a versatile array of solid punchlines, ringing mayhem and fiery 4-bar set-ups to easily beat back an opponent who seemed disinterested from the jump and eventually backed up his rather lethargic showing by cutting his round short.
Verdict: Boogie (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Boogie – “You bad as me? Quit acting T, Walmart wouldn’t make it this graphic T [tee]!”
Recap: Some fierce name flips, a gang of hard-hitting punchlines, spicy current event bars and a bunch of stinging set-ups/gun bars/braggadocios lines gives JC the win over a gritty, but overall less substantive Drugz in this Quarantined 1-rounder from URL.
Verdict: JC (W) 1-0
Favorite line: JC – “This ain’t comp, this a case, that’s gonna be easier to get out of than grade school!”
Recap: A credit to Street Hymns’ creativity and dual pen game here as the ‘fake’ Charron he’d incorporate into his raps had me fooled at first when he first showed up at the door. Then too, Street’s Bible-laced wordplay and nifty/mocking personals were also on point. And while Charron’s just-waking-up, from-the-basement-peeking visuals doesn’t come close to competing with his opponent’s more neighborhood-friendly optics, bar-wise ‘Billy Pistols’ was all-in, using some ridiculous name flips and an ever-strong (“After this quarantine you know that I’ll rap harder, ‘cuz the game needs me more than I need a black barber!”) punch game to earn a draw in what turned to be a pretty dope 1-rounder from RBE.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Street Hymns – “Man I got Quads, Quintuples, Sextuples, I done built a 4th wall more than Ted Pool!”
Recap: Sure, one could argue that Ah Di Boom got mentioned a little too much in this battle. But with both Bigg K and Floss da Boss uttering Boom’s name, in this 1-round Social Distance battle from RBE, sparing a mulligan for all the Boom talk doesn’t get in the way of Bigg K’s more consistently flexing punchlines, lofty name flips and witty jargon earning him the win.
Verdict: Bigg K (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Bigg K – “How is a worker with no teeth named Floss da Boss…get lost!”
Recap: 1-round URL Quarantined battle between Geechi Gotti and Jerry Wess sees them both wreck havoc with plenty of gun bars-a-blazing to go with loads of spiteful mayhem. But with Gotti also equipped with a gang of gritty name flips, a creative and stifling cameo from his girlfriend, a steadier flow and more spicy punchlines, call this one another vic for Geechi.
Verdict: Geechi Gotti (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Geechi Gotti – “All my enemies in they grave turning over…now that’s a plot twist!”
Recap: Getting downright mean, disrespectful and personal with a host of fiery gun bars to back him up, a menacing and more versatile Ill Will beats back what was essentially another gun-heavy, mixtape verse from T-Rex in this 1-round Social Distance match from RBE.
Verdict: Ill Will (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Ill Will – “Nigga, I seen all things, from triple to all beams, dog fiends, coke so white it’s the captain of the lacrosse team!”
Recap: Delivering as much as a talking too as he was piercing punchlines/personals throughout the battle, a more condensed (and blase) Ave spouts enough versatility with his bars as well as steadier heat with his lines to take the first two rounds and beat back a pretty solid throughout and gun-heavy, but too one-dimensional Dre Dennis in this 3-rounder from Gates of the Garden.
Verdict: Ave (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Ave – “We not the same, you think I came to spit you my best?, y’all expect a classic Jersey….try Mitchell & Ness!”
Recap: Plenty of head-ringing/adept punchlines from both sides in this close and competitive 1-round battle between Riggz and Cipha Da Lyrical. Still Riggz, slightly more innovative with the wordplay while showcasing a steadier flow than his opponent, ends up with the win here.
Verdict: Riggz (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Riggz – “Two hecklers, I’ll put you on the Ground King like Bun B or get you leaned to death like Pimp C…pick a group member!”
Recap: Another one of those ‘Can’t believe these two never battled already’ bouts pits longtime vets DNA and John John Da Don finally getting together for a 1-round Quarantine matchup on IG live. Both JJDD and DNA sprung together some punch-worthy turns with some dope schemes, fire wit and grandiose personals mixed in. But with an equal amount of haymakers from each battler, DNA’s ability to kick a wicked freestyle in the midst of his writtens and go extra hard on the personals, gives him the edge here.
Verdict: DNA (W) 1-0
Favorite line: DNA – “He shaking his head, I see a lot of ‘nahs’ [Nas] here, but that’s a Thief’s Theme!”
Recap: Granted, he was helped by a shitload of Presidential Dubz dry spots in the latter two rounds. But after getting served by his opponent’s more consistent and visceral shiners throughout the 1st round, the normally name-flip swinging and rapid-punching Ru Bando would make a workmanlike effort in mounting his comeback. The Bed-Stuy, BK, rapper mixing in some astute personals and rigid wordplay to his noted repertoire to edge a 2nd round he didn’t seem to have much chance of winning going in. Bando would then take advantage of another solid, but oft-redundant turn by Dubz in the deciding 3rd round with a more versatile, consistent and slightly more condensed turn that would edge him the win.
Verdict: Ru Bando (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Ru Bando – “I’m mad humble, but truthfully, Prezzy what the fuck was you thinking you was gonna do with me?, Ruger squeeze, off his top when I shoot the piece, they won’t recognize the 3rd for nuthin’…Martin Luther King!”
Recap: In a true sign of the times, in lieu of the worldwide Coronavirus pandemic going on that’s keep us all on house arrest, Smack/URL gets innovative with its first ‘Quarantined’ matchup featuring Mike P. versus Tay Roc. And with no stage or crowd and instead, each battler delivering their bars on video from the comfort of their homes, the battle certainly offers a different feel and dynamic. That said, it’s still a goodie with Roc and Mike competitively going at it for about 5 minutes apiece and Roc, slightly more effective when it came to infusing current-day events into his raps, more consistent on a whole and delivering a steadier stream of dizzying boasts/personals/mayhem on top, taking the round and the win.
Verdict: Tay Roc (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Tay Roc – “I’ll catch Mike and his bitch at a restaurant, beautiful setting, then fuck Mike up in that booth, it’s a studio session!”
Recap: Exquisite name flips, stifling punchlines, gritty trap talk, fiery schemes and sizzling braggadocio bars, in this GOTG 1-rounder versus a pretty solid and at times punch-heavy Drop 30, for a hyperbolic T-Top the steady ensemble of heat is all there, allowing Top Bizzy to handily beat back his less potent opponent.
Verdict: T-Top (W) 1-0
Favorite line: T-Top – “But I’ve been spraying with the arm, fuck it, I’m a shoot him first, I came to split 30 in half like I ain’t used to perks!”
Recap: No, they’re not battling in a church (after viewing what looked to be two crosses stationed at the top of the stairs, had to scan the Comments to verify that this battle actually takes place in a Houston club). That said, in this 1-round battle between T-Top and hometown fave Scotty, the latter’s penchant for wit and dishing entertaining narratives/personals remain indisputable. However, when it comes to Scotty’s weakness: lack of potency/intricacy with his punchlines, well, that’s another story and more importantly here, the difference-maker, even against a slip-up owning, B-grade T-Top who’s redundant themes was still gritty, personal and consistent enough to help supply him with the win.
Verdict: T-Top (W) 1-0
Favorite line: T-Top – “I really tried to lose wight, but I’m a hustla dog, so every pound you see me with, I tried dumping it off!”
Recap: Ah Di Boom’s return to battle rap is a bizarre and inconsistent one as the South Jersey rapper first has to deal with a gang of allegations from opponent Bigg K of being a snitch (a serious claim, that included K handing out paperwork to the crowd, yet didn’t seem to bother Boom nearly as much as it did K), before spitting a spitfire, punch and performance-heavy 2nd round that reminded everyone of Boom’s hey days. And despite the usually punchline-crazy K not being on his A-game throughout this battle (perhaps because he was too hellbent on the personals), thanks to Boom spitting a gang of reaches, mediocre punches and righteous filler, a more consistent K is able to do just enough to edge both the 1st and 3rd rounds for the win.
Verdict: Bigg K (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Bigg K – “I been popped tags, how could you ever hate on me, first staff you ever grabbed came from ARP, y’all battle rappers never trapping like they say y’all be, so if you ever pumping gas you putting 8 on 3!”
Recap: Both Craig Lamar and Goddie Lumenati work hard to spare no one when it comes to dishing the mayhem in this 1-round battle from Gates of the Garden. But the more savagely bent on destruction Lumenati, visceral with the heat, lit with the set-ups and consistently spicy with the punchlines gets the edge here.
Verdict: Goddie Lumenati (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Goddie Lumenati – “Dog slacking and it’s a Passion of Christ if they God acting!”
Recap: No huge upset here as Hollow Da Don’s consistent usage of fervent wit and fiery punchlines easily dispatches his mostly subpar punching opponent CJ Pimp in this 2-round, Coronavirus/video battle brought to you by IG_Battle_League.
Verdict: Hollow Da Don (W) 2-0
Favorite line: Hollow Da Don – “This what a real man should never look like, you feminine ill, it’s sad, your parents still ain’t did your gender reveal!”
Recap: In this highly anticipated (and much promoted, considering they got their own billboard) matchup from URL’s Genesis card, Geechi Gotti hits on all cylinders, using a consistent barrage of boastful barbs, witty/gritty name flips, gripping O.G. talk, mocking personals, some syrupy wordplay, real street shit and piercing punchlines over the course of 3 rounds to beat back a pretty solid, gun bar-lit and at times cunning with the punches, but too often tentative and pedestrian Nu Jerzey Twork.
Verdict: Geechi Gotti (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Geechi Gotti – “Aye, you beat up Norbes?, I really don’t care, I’m just tryin’ to figure out what that mean to a nigga that really clap things, shoot him, his body shut down, blood stream fucked up worser than Caffeine!”
Recap: “I used to sell wet Timbaland’s!” LOL!!! I know that line was just part of the set-up, but the way Hollaluyah Jones crafted it and left it in the air before finishing the punch was just brilliant. Still, a close and competitive 1-rounder here between Jones and Henny #3, while showcasing the former’s piercing wit and skill for dope name flips/performance-rich punches, also featured an overall strong, gun bar-heavy, mayhem-friendly and gritty punchline showing from the latter, leading to the more haymaker-lit Henny to earn the win.
Verdict: Henny #3 (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Henny #3 – “We gonna ride on him, hide on him, one round to wash this boy, put the Tide on him, code word ‘waterpark’…slide on him!”
Recap: Will we see more of this Drugz in the future now that he’s a part of NWX? As even with a loss here, this is one of the best, consistently punch-heavy and (“You with wifey?, I’ll put the chrome to her chest, and let the hammer blast, bucks in breast, like grandma’s stash!”) gun’s-a-blazing versions of Drugz we’ve seen of late. That said (undoubtedly to his opponent’s chagrin) DNA happened to be on his shit too, the battle vet delivering a steady stream of fire name flips, fierce personals, rigid battle rap tutorials and a host of lyrical (“Wolf of Wall Street, Drugz [drugs] gonna make the stock drop!”) shiners to take rounds 1 and 3 for the win.
Verdict: DNA (W) 2-1
Favorite line: DNA – “Beam, I’m a buck it tonight, Ray Charles, I’m a shoot Drugz [drugs] with nothing in sight!”
Recap: Incredibly persistent when it comes to hard name flips, flagrant wordplay, aggressive bluster and piercing punchlines, Jey The Nitewing does more than enough to make easy work of a solid overall, but a bit filler-prone turn by Shockwave during this 1-rounder from a Purpz G, Rise of the Phoenix card in Arizona.
Verdict: Jey The Nitewing (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Jey The Nitewing – “Nigga thought this was his window of opportunity, nah nigga…this is curtains!”
Recap: On point throughout with a rampant and fiery punch game that dished out some exquisite name flips, head-swinging mayhem and piercing 4-bar set-ups, G Lowe easily beats back a solid, but oft-pedestrian bar spouting Will Major in this 1-rounder from Bayou Battle League.
Verdict: G Lowe (W) 1-0
Favorite line: G Lowe – “You better write write, cuz for the right price, you get hit with a nice right, go night night, chopper lift Will [wheel] in the air…bike life!”
Recap: Game effort from Big Kannon, what with all the crowd interruptions, etc., to make it through his 3 rounds in this Anybody Can Die Battle League matchup versus Stack Almighty. The veteran BK keeping it competitive with a solid bunch of spicy freestyles and rebuttals when he wasn’t flexing throughout the battle with piercing punchlines and fiery wordplay. Still, outside of a debatable 1st round, the consistently righteous punches, fierce street ethos, stinging name flips and raw heat from Stack would be too much for even BK in the end, the Michigan battler edging both of the latter rounds for the win.
Verdict: Stack Almighty (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Stack Almighty – “You getting all my best punches tonight, it’s like my greatest hits!”
Recap: Even during a pandemic, the Chef be out here cooking. This time using prolific gun bars, stunted vet talk, a couple of flexing rebuts and some fierce wordplay/punchlines to beat a pretty solid punching, but not as consistent with his handle Cosmo Kessler in this 3-rounder from 15 Minutes of Fame.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “I blaze guns, Trae Young, I’ll shoot as soon as I cross the line!”
Recap: Scoring left and right with boastful punchlines, righteous gun lines, stunted schemes/name flips and a boatload of pointed personals, in this 3-rounder from SupaNova Rap Battles, Ryda keeps the heat on a gripping and punch-heavy at times, but also flow-challenged Ooops to easily take the first two rounds before a debatable 3rd allows his opponent to put one up on the scoreboard.
Verdict: Ryda (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Ryda – “Something just wasn’t sitting right, I could just tell you wasn’t living right, had the nerve to call your movie the ‘St. Louis Superman’ and the whole time the green was your kryptonite!”
Recap: Regardless of the verdict here that has Ill Will winning this battle, theoretically there’s really no losers here. And that speaks to how nice 40 Cal. was. Making his decade-plus long return to battle rap, the Harlem “industry” rapper did what most of his peers before him couldn’t do: put on a quality and competitive show. Indeed, from the opening round, via some pretty solid (“You playing pretend and don’t know my story truth, when on the back of every Henny Yak bottle say 40 proof!”) punchlines, gritty boasts and greasy personals (that esp. came together in a witty 3rd round that 40 edged), all the while using a slower and pronounced flow that stayed steady throughout the battle, for the most part, not only did 40 Cal. do really well here, but he made Ill Will earn the victory. And utilizing a steadier trope of stinging punches, raucous (“But I burn shit, learn shit, closed casket or urn shit, it’s apparent [a parent] I’m Dwyane Wade, soon as I raise the tre [3] I knew he’ll turn bitch!”) heat, biting personals and flexing performance bars, a more consistently fire and versatile Ill Will does more than enough to take both of the opening rounds and attain the win.
Verdict: Ill Will (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Ill Will – “I’ll show up where ya people be, iron on me got me feeling wrinkle free!”
Recap: That “Pillow on the barrel, just to keep the baby quiet!” line by Ghostt was extra mean and the confident up-n-comer also impressed here with a boatload fly rebuttals, dope punchlines, an ability to freestyle, a gang of daunting gun bars and quality personals (against Trez as well as battlers within his home league). That said, another element of being a top tier vet is never taking your opponent for granted. And the Chef makes sure not to do so here, taking away any chance of an upset with his own barrage of spitfire rebuttals, fierce name flips, some fine wordplay, an armory of head-swinging gun bars and enough hard-hitting punchlines to take rounds 1 and 2 before his less punch-heavy, but more versatile opponent earned a debatable 3rd.
Verdict: Chef Trez (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Chef Trez – “My dog’s say you got a thousand flips for the nigger’s name, I said shit I would have zero if his dumb ass ain’t pick the name!”
Recap: Well ummm…that was bad. Really bad. Yet, to Serius Jones’ credit, an alright freestyle game allowed him to complete his 2nd and 3rd rounds (after he choked in the 1st) and avoid what would’ve been a pretty embarrassing bodybag.–to think, this is a guy who was not only a former Fight Klub champ, but has wins over the likes of Charlie Clips, Dizaster and Arsonal under his belt. As for opponent Tony D.? Nothing too spectacular here (not that he needed much considering his opponent’s many failings), but still a spiffy barrage of witty barns, feelgood personals, jaunty boasts and some abstract punchlines more than did their job.
Verdict: Tony D (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Tony D – “You talking battle rapping in its prime?, I led a champion’s life, anyone could be a veteran, ‘cuz that shit’s just a matter of time!”
Recap: Taking advantage of a Lu Castro who while dialing up a gang of brazen punchlines and gangly street missives throughout the battle, but also struggled a bit with his flow as the battle proceeded, the slightly more skittish, but still punch-heavy, solid with the wordplay and educational/personal-lit when needed Spade edges round 2 (after losing the opener) and also the deciding 3rd round of this 3BLSC Hostile Takeover 3 to gain the win.
Verdict: Spade (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Spade – “I don’t wanna hear shit about how you lining up the beam, ‘cuz all these rappers be talking sideways and he Conway the Machine!”
Recap: A close 1st round, but afterwards not much of a contest. That’s the summary on Rum Nitty versus O’fficial from the URL/QOTR Royalty card as while O’fficial proved to be a worthy puncher and mayhem-dishing spitter that could give Rum some comp, overall Nitty’s much slicker wordplay/name flips, elite gun bars, performance-enhanced punchlines and witty personals along with redundant name flips and too much filler (esp. in the latter rounds) from O would do her in despite a mostly solid effort.
Verdict: Rum Nitty (W) 3-0
Favorite line: Rum Nitty – “You the one dying, you poking ya chest out…with nuthin’ to back it up, come try it, and it’s gonna be an Offcial body…one-sided!”
Recap: Dope, scintillating and punchline-heavy 1-rounder from Loewkey Battle League between Stuey Newton and Brixx Belvy features a gang of flexing personals, righteous wordplay, hard-hitting street missives, piercing name flips and slicing gun bars. However, with nary a dry spot from both battlers, the edge on haymakers goes Stuey’s way for the win.
Verdict: Stuey Newton (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Stuey Newton – “Be calm, act smart then let’s play stupid, Tek’s spray ruthless…steel… drum…banging…reggae music!”
Recap: As pointed out here in the past, battlers need to be more careful about what names they pick. Because not only does your name say a lot about you, but names flips an important tool to have in battle rap and as dope as a movie American Gangster was, its main character Frank Lucas’ reputation for being a snitch is pretty well documented. Thus, even a low tier battle rapper would be dumb if he didn’t take advantage of an easy name flip. Kid Chaos not only using his opponent’s moniker for some exquisite wordplay, but also dishing some fiery schemes, righteous mayhem and witty personals to get the win over his inconsistent and questionably-named adversary in this 1-rounder from Zoo Battle League.
Verdict: Kid Chaos (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Kid Chaos – “I should grip the blade and split ya face, since you wanna steal a snitch’s name…knot ya shit!”
Recap: Not sure why a mostly mayhem-dishing, fiery and name flip-spazzing Holmzie Da God would also go after Chef Trez’s rebuttal game as it takes a special skill to rebuttal and the Chef is one of the best at it. But other than one questionable angle and a slow start to both his 1st round (which he lost) and his 3rd (which he won), it’s a flexing and top-notch showing by Holmzie, who takes advantage of a bit of a lazy pen/flow from the usually more consistent Trez to out-punch and out-perform his opponent in the latter rounds for the win.
Verdict: Holmzie Da God (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Holmzie Da God – “I pull it out, the mag clap, you better duck, Aflac, a small cap will leave this brim bit like a dad hat!”
Recap: Big Kannon and UK battler Matter get together for a pretty underwhelming 3 rounds that outside of your usual boastful battle bars and witty barbs, saw a whole lot of predictable fat jokes from Matter and a whole lot of whining from BK about lack of promotion for the bout amongst other things. That said, a nice 1st round rebuttal from a more versatile BK helps him edge the first before the Chicago rapper also takes the 2nd (and gets the win) thanks to a more condensed turn there. A mostly unprepared and argumentative turn from BK allows a far more steadier Matter to take the 3rd.
Verdict: Big Kannon (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Big Kannon – “…and I’ve had this discussion with chicks, you look like something that doesn’t exist!”
Recap: Outside of yet another elongated, but this time subpar 3rd round, in this 3-rounder from URL’s Genesis card, a versatile T-Top uses a gang of hard-hitting personals, witty barbs, fire set-ups, rich storytelling, fierce punchlines and hardcore street rhymes to get another win off of Arsonal who Top had just upped in a 1-roudner the year prior. This rematch, while entertaining at times with Arsonal nearly causing a melee in round 1 as one of T-Top’s boys didn’t seem to take kindly to some of Ars’ more disrespectful bars at Top, often lacked substance on both sides (which can probably be due to them battling again so quickly). But while Arsonal was solid throughout lyrically, disrespectfully and aggressively, way too many pedestrian bars by the Jersey capo would also hurt in the end.
Verdict: T-Top (W) 2-1
Favorite line: T-Top – “Grab a cig and put the loosie over the Grape like Ricky Ricardo wife!”
Recap: In this dope West-coast 1-rounder, during the first half of his turn Da Kid Clutch makes quite an impression, dishing gritty punchlines/personals and hardbody gun bars with an aggressive performance to stay competitive. However, the 2nd half of Clutch’s turn, while still spent on flexing a load of heat, would see him falter a bit in terms of bar potency. And in light of a turned up Geechi Gotti consistently delivering a plethora of boastful punches, witty personals, formidable name flips and fiery gun lines/schemes that all but made their point, Clutch’s more erratic showing ends up not standing a chance to beat back yet another stellar showing by his opponent.
Verdict: Geechi Gotti (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Geechi Gotti – “Imagine that, the shit you call highlights is below my average, nigga, this your championship game, bitch, this my practice!”
Recap: A confident, punchline/set up-lit and gun bar spazzing Boze The Bambino makes quick and easy work of a hitting at times (mostly in round 3), but too abbreviated and oft-passive with the heat Nick G in this PG matchup from URL, Boze handily taking both of the opening rounds before his Illinois opponent stepped his bar game up to edge the finale.
Verdict: Boze The Gambino (W) 2-1
Favorite like: Boze The Gambino – “For this big bitch [raises arm like a gun], extension on the waist like maternity pants!”
Recap: From Bayou Battle League, credit to 4Kus who in this 1-rounder abandoned the usual assortment of ghostwriting allegations and Math Hoffa references we normally see against Bonnie Godiva and instead went the persistent mayhem, boastful barbs an hard-hitting punches route to make for a solid effort. Too bad for 4kus Bonnie wasn’t about to change her m.o. up, the veteran rapper putting it all together with a resounding turn that featured a gang of flippant personals, steely punches, fiery gun bars and stinging name flips/wordplay to win this one hands down.
Verdict: Bonnie Godiva (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Bonnie Godiva – “Besides your bum-ass resume, you know the first thing about you I can’t stand? battling a no-name nigger with man fans!”
Recap: In this 1-rounder from Gates of the Garden, Kyd Slade uses a gang of fiery gun bars, boastful barbs, some hitting wordplay and piercing, street-themed punches to handily beat back opponent SG, who got off to a solid and gritty start before succumbing to a couple of unforced errors with his flow and stopping midway through his round.
Verdict: Kyd Slade (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Kyd Slade – “I got issues, I paint a picture in my mind I’m dumbing, sending nigga’s to God for nothing, I gotta get it, Jiminy Cricket, my conscious buggin'”
Recap: Madflex’s unorthodox stylings, pointed personals, witty (“Fat Thor!”) anecdotes and often clever wordplay make for a debatable 1st round and a close 2nd and 3rd. But in this aggressive, competitive and fiery bout from KOTD, Bigg K’s gritty name flips, flexing punchlines. fierce braggadocios darts and stinging metaphors/personals combine with more consistency/potency to edge the latter rounds and earn the win.
Verdict: Bigg K (W) 2-1
Favorite line: Bigg K – “I ain’t no fucking battle rapper, where you know me from, your O.G. my little homie and he owe me one!”
Recap: Sometimes it’s not about the opponent not showing up, but rather showing up without a plan. That description pretty much describes O-Red to a tee here in this rematch against JC on a URL Genesis card. Whether it was attempting to get off on a slower, pronounced flow in round 1 that went nowhere what with mostly pedestrian bars or trying to mano-a-mano with JC in regard to who could dish better sport bars or resident name flips that were mostly ho-hum or even a Translation utterance that fell flat, when it came to angles and executions, Red just seemed to be going in circles. And that’s not a good look especially in light of an top tier adversary who was clearly more motivated to win this battle. Indeed for 3 rounds, JC nuanced with the set-ups and coming down hard on the punches, flexing with the gun bars/name flips, spouting some piercing personals and ever bullish with the wordplay, had an easy time of it here against an opponent who at times looked like he couldn’t wait to leave the stage.
Verdict: JC (W) 3-0
Favorite line: JC – “Six years ago I would of left this bitch as the best to write, I punched with Tyson Fury and I don’t expect you to be any Wilder in the 2nd fight!”
Recap: In this raucous, punch-heavy, name flip-spazzing, gun bar-slinging and competitive 1-round battle from L.O.E.W.key Battle League, a more steady with the heat Young Kannon beats back the aggressive, but overall less potent stylings of LL Coogi.
Verdict: Young Kannon (W) 1-0
Favorite line: Young Kannon – “Your casket waiting, I brought the cig [sig] for the paper like an affidavit, your dome I’ll push it to the side…I’m a procrastinator!”
Recap: One of the best anglers in the game and the 1st battle rapper to call out (even tho he’d do it himself later) dudes who use ‘chest’ instead of ‘Chess’ when using name flips against his opponent, a super confident John John Da Don does his research and uses a superbly-executed mix of gripping/witty personals, fiery set-ups/schemes, nifty wordplay and righteous punchlines for 3 rounds to beat back a solid and gun-lit throughout, but sometimes flow-challenged, pedestrian and seemingly even overwhelmed at times Chess in this Genesis battle from URL.
Verdict: John John Da Don (W) 3-0
Favorite line: John John Da Don – “Be honest fam, Steams or Tay Roc, who’s your true leader?, look at him, having flashbacks, forced to make a bold decision because he couldn’t eat without those 2 liters [leaders]!”
Recap: Fire, competitive battle between Don Marino and B. Magic features a variety of slick punchlines and fierce set-ups throughout the battle. And while Marino was able to dip in some pointed personals here and there, a more condensed Magic, after losing round 1, would score with enough (“Act tough and uh, Tek’s gonna hit y’all, it’ll calm that shit down like Pepto Bismol!”) haymakers to edge round 2, before hanging in there versus a robust turn from his opponent in the deciding 3rd round and force a draw.
Verdict: TIE
Favorite line: Don Marino – “You only got one or two moves in the ring…Mankind!”
